Elle-Kay
23-06-04, 17:47
Hi all,
I know I only joined yesterday, so I hope no-one minds me posting my niggles already :)
I've been unemployed since I graduated from university, last July (2003), and have been signing on since September of that year. I made the conscious decision not to have a job during uni', so that it didn't interrupt my studies, and I never had to have a part-time job while I was at school. The other day, I was called and offered a full-time job (to tide me over until I start teacher training college next September). This will be my first EVER job, and I'm worried that I'm going to A) not be able to do it, or B) screw it up by having panic attacks (it's a reception position at a traditional Chinese medicine therapy clinic, so I'm always going to be around people).
I keep trying to tell myself that I'm really lucky, because the job is in my local area - barely 10 minutes walk from my home in fact! - and most people only manage to find work in the city (only 4 miles away, but still a milestone for me). Despite this though, I'm still getting all wound up that I'll not be able to start it and get into all sorts of legal trouble (contractual etc.), or that I'll start it and look a complete fool by having panic attacks, and have to embarrass myself (and risk not getting a job in future because of a bad reference) by resigning after a short period of time :( I keep having awful visions of having to walk out part way through a day without any warning or something, and it's making me procrastinate about phoning back to accept the job (I feel that if I accept it, that's it, I've sealed my fate).
I really don't know what to do, and time is running out :( I don't think I can tell my future boss about my condition(s), because he would (understandably) want to employ someone else...
I know I only joined yesterday, so I hope no-one minds me posting my niggles already :)
I've been unemployed since I graduated from university, last July (2003), and have been signing on since September of that year. I made the conscious decision not to have a job during uni', so that it didn't interrupt my studies, and I never had to have a part-time job while I was at school. The other day, I was called and offered a full-time job (to tide me over until I start teacher training college next September). This will be my first EVER job, and I'm worried that I'm going to A) not be able to do it, or B) screw it up by having panic attacks (it's a reception position at a traditional Chinese medicine therapy clinic, so I'm always going to be around people).
I keep trying to tell myself that I'm really lucky, because the job is in my local area - barely 10 minutes walk from my home in fact! - and most people only manage to find work in the city (only 4 miles away, but still a milestone for me). Despite this though, I'm still getting all wound up that I'll not be able to start it and get into all sorts of legal trouble (contractual etc.), or that I'll start it and look a complete fool by having panic attacks, and have to embarrass myself (and risk not getting a job in future because of a bad reference) by resigning after a short period of time :( I keep having awful visions of having to walk out part way through a day without any warning or something, and it's making me procrastinate about phoning back to accept the job (I feel that if I accept it, that's it, I've sealed my fate).
I really don't know what to do, and time is running out :( I don't think I can tell my future boss about my condition(s), because he would (understandably) want to employ someone else...