Hanbr
15-05-13, 13:34
Hey I posted on here a few weeks back about my health anxiety..basically for the past six years I have felt constantly dizzy/weird and am convincing myself nothing is real and I'm going to collapse/die... The strange thing is the intensity of these symptoms just keep going worse which makes me believe its not anxiety..however I've had blood tests,ecgs, ultrasounds X-rays etc...but I'm still not convinced. Like they must have missed something because I shouldn't feel like this from the moment I wake up till I go to sleep.
I did have a good couple of weeks where I worked for a couple of hours (with my mum and boyfriend being there though)
But I've just taken a million steps back.. I don't even want to leave the house,I don't want my mum or boyfriend to leave the house.. My mum isn't working and I don't even like her popping down the road. This part is upsetting me most, fair enough I have to be burdened with this but I HATE putting my family through this, it's breaking us apart. I have been an emotional wreck.. Getting up crying so much I collapse because I just can't cope anymore, I don't even know who I am as I feel like anxiety is the only thing people see. I am only 18 and this is ruining my life.. I can't cope with it anymore,I just feel so helpless and such a burden on my family.. I just don't think they understand how terrified I am every second that I'm dying... Which is backed up with me feeling so rubbish . I see no way out and I can't do it anymore, I'm sick of crying and feeling sorry for myself but every time I seem to push myself I end up going backwards and the intensity of my dizziness is worsening making me give up hope and feeling emotionally drained. I just feel very alone even though I have amazing people around me.. It's got to the point where I just breakdown every day and I don't want to put myself or my family through it anymore.... Sorry just really needed to vent my emotions
Hannah xx
I did have a good couple of weeks where I worked for a couple of hours (with my mum and boyfriend being there though)
But I've just taken a million steps back.. I don't even want to leave the house,I don't want my mum or boyfriend to leave the house.. My mum isn't working and I don't even like her popping down the road. This part is upsetting me most, fair enough I have to be burdened with this but I HATE putting my family through this, it's breaking us apart. I have been an emotional wreck.. Getting up crying so much I collapse because I just can't cope anymore, I don't even know who I am as I feel like anxiety is the only thing people see. I am only 18 and this is ruining my life.. I can't cope with it anymore,I just feel so helpless and such a burden on my family.. I just don't think they understand how terrified I am every second that I'm dying... Which is backed up with me feeling so rubbish . I see no way out and I can't do it anymore, I'm sick of crying and feeling sorry for myself but every time I seem to push myself I end up going backwards and the intensity of my dizziness is worsening making me give up hope and feeling emotionally drained. I just feel very alone even though I have amazing people around me.. It's got to the point where I just breakdown every day and I don't want to put myself or my family through it anymore.... Sorry just really needed to vent my emotions
Hannah xx