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View Full Version : Newbie..HA is ruining my life



MOLLYMO
19-05-13, 08:06
Hi there,
I found this excellent site while googling more of my symptoms.
So far I have thought I had MS which actually turned out to be Vit B12 deficiency, then I thought I had skin cancer which turned out to be mild eczema.
Two weeks ago I noticed my tummy was bloated, had alternate constipation / diarrhoea, and pains in my back. I googled the symptoms and ovarian cancer came up, which scared the life out of me. Went to see my GP who examined me, told me it was most likely to be IBS but as a precaution he sent me for a whole load of blood tests - these thankfully all came back normal. I was still worried though and went to see a different GP who tried to reassure me. She tested my urine and an infection showed up with traces of blood in my pee. She gave me a course of strong antibiotics which I finish today, and I have to have my pee checked again tomorrow.
I have been to A&E with my back pain as on thursday I thought I was having a heart attack- I had awful stabbing burning pains in my back and round to my chest and couldnt't breathe- I had an ECG, heart trace , more blood tests, and a chest Xray- all of which were completely normal. The dr said the pains in my back are probably just due to a muscular tear / strain and that my symptoms were down to a severe panic attack.

Even after all this reassurance, I still worry that I have cancer or some other severe terminal illness, that the doctors have missed it and that I will die early- I'm 38 with a wonderful husband and great kids, my youngest is only 4. I was hysterical the other day as I'm convinced I'm going to die and that the kids won't remember me.

Can anyone identify with what I'm going through. I really hate these horrible feelings. Thank you xx

Mipsy
19-05-13, 08:26
Hi there,
I can totally relate to your story.
I have had 2 years of CBT which has helped. Through this therapy I have discovered the reason behind my anxiety. It's mainly the fear of leaving my children motherless. This stemmed back from witnessing my own mother having a heart attack when I was only 9 years old.
Perhaps you have a similar fear, being a mum of young children.
Chat to your GP about being referred for some CBT. It has really helped me. I still have moments where my HA is high, like now, and I usually put it down to general stresses in my life.
Good luck and let us know how you get on.
X x

Ats666
19-05-13, 09:44
I can relate exactly to how you are feeling and it is such a horrible feeling. I often sit there and cry hysterically as I think my children are going to be left with no mother. Luckily I start my CBT on Thursday so I am hoping that this helps me deal with my feelings. This site is great for someone to speak to though. Hope you feel better soon :hugs:

flori
19-05-13, 12:05
Hi and :welcome:
I am certain you will find this site really helpful.

MOLLYMO
19-05-13, 19:51
Thank you all for the helpful replies, I am on Citalopram 20mg daily which helps sometimes but most of the time I feel so anxious. My husband is older than me (he's 52) and I don't think he'd cope with being left with the kids if I died, I'm rambling now sorry but its good to know that I'm not alone in this horrible condition. I will ask the GP about CBT this week.

Thank you all and big hugs xxx

flori
19-05-13, 19:53
Mollymo
Here is a link if you are interested.
http://www.getselfhelp.co.uk/mindfulness.htm

almamatters
19-05-13, 20:11
Hi :welcome: to the site, I'm sure you will find loads of help and support on here.

sparkle_1979
19-05-13, 20:18
Sending hugs I'm 33 married with two toddlers and I'm in the same boat as you lovely, you're not alone in feeling this way

panicperson
21-05-13, 23:00
I am the same: 27, 5 yr old and 9month old. Spent 9months with bad health anxiety after a cancer scare. I am horrendous now. I don't have more than a few days without a new symptom or worry. Draining, tiring and upsetting.
I fear the GP has misdiagnosed me.
Horrid problem.

EmilyK83
21-05-13, 23:21
I'm going to agree with everyone who's mentioned CBT - definitely helped me to think about my anxiety in a different way. I won't claim that I'm fully "cured" but this forum's amazing for putting your mind at ease - it seems that you'll always find someone who's been in the same boat as you and can help you to see that anxiety works in all sorts of mysterious ways! x

panicperson
22-05-13, 06:50
Can I ask: how often did u all have CBT? Weekly, monthly? And how long for?x