severe worried about my health

[unsure_about_this]

My HA is getting worst each day. from reading symptoms it seems like I get them. It is becoming now a joke going to the doctors even though my parents says you just been this week.

Being 29 I should have not many worries.

Nobody in the family is like this (from what I know) we don't have no family history of anything major like the big c word (My Dad and his brother's have got blood pressure problems mainly because their smoke and drink booze, plus their age) my dad's pressure is getting back to normal.

I feel I must go each day to the doctors it seems just to be reassurance there is nothing wrong with me (and more likely be asked to leave the practice) with reading about every cancer possible and disease. I cannot stop feeling my bones, having a good old prod and check for lumps, bumps etc.

The cancer phobia has not gone away. I cannot stop feeling my abdominal area whether I can feel anything which should not be there, I know we all got guts, muscles etc. in that area. Also checking my poop size shape etc. It always brown.

I am not going more often than I usually do.

Main concerned is still bowel cancer, no blood whilst wiping or on poo, no mucus etc.

I been told if I have IBS and it could be down to my diet and what I drink or reading too much google and health websites, stress as well.

I had two different scans of abdominal (CT, ultrasound) results all fine, would have liked a full scan because I am concerned about everything which could be wrong with my body. a blood test etc. six times abdominal been felt, three rectal exams. and other examinations. blood tested for blood clotting, liver problems, kidney, thyroid, inflammation and probably more these blood test were fine.

It making my body feel tense (also worried about my heart even though my blood pressure is fine (surprising watching the football team I support it has not gone up) weight fine a little bit underweight.

I concerned every ache, pain and spot could be cancer, even though the doctor, dentist, eye doctor have seen no signs, including specialist.

Hopefully be next month with CBT, I can get rid some of this tension. and get back to normal even though it could take months or years.

[nomorepanic]

I think the first step is to STOP going to the doctors every day and do NOT google anything.

Do you work at all?

You need some distraction in your life to take the focus away from cancer and all this self checking.

[unsure_about_this]

Hi

Many thanks for your reply.

I am currently unemployed, but searching hard each day. like you said I got to find ways to drive myself away from Google (i.e watching classic Disney films instead.)

I hoping the CBT can find the route of the problem what started it all off, whether it was the bowel cancer advert, someone having an fit which I saw, my Dad doing his bowel screening sample because of his age or my Dad's brother going into hospital hitting his head a few years ago. It might even have been Kylie Minogue cancer in 2005.

It might have also my Granddad heart attack (not blood related) he is fine, my Granddad (my dad's father) who died in 1998 sudden of a heart attack a few days before Christmas (but had a bad cold) it might be because I am worried about something else.

[eastofeden]

I can totally relate. some days im so depressed that i just can't look forward to anything because im so convinced i have some terminal disease. i found that when i was unemployed my health anxiety was extra bad because i had wayyy too much time to think, especially about myself. when im busy it's like i forget about the twinges and aches.

i know how annoying it is to be nagged at to get a job but I've found the happiest people i know also work hardest, and it is that way they don't have time to worry about every little thing they feel.

i think things like cancer produce quite marked and severe symptoms and it is this reason that most cancers are diagnosed because the symptoms are just too unusual and noticeable to ignore even in very anxiety free people.

plus you are so young. it would be so unusual to have cancer at your age. everyone with HA is unique in their worries so you might find talking to a counsellor about your fears will help you find some peace.

i also know the feeling about constantly seeking reassurance from the doctor. i went to the dr 3 times last week and they are so sick of me that i get the feeling they won't ever take me seriously again, and might even fire me from their patient list.
i know how hemmed in and alone HA can make you feel.
this forum is a great place and you will find a lot of support here. good luck.