Tired of being scared

[jamie1125]

Hi everyone. I am 34 years old. Have a great husband and 2 great kids. I used to go out and do a lot of things but the past 5 years my life has stopped. I am afraid of having a heart attack. It is all I think about. My dad died at the very young age of 37 of a heart attack. My boyfriend died a few years later at the age of 30 of a blood clot that went to his heart. Sooo...needless to say...I am a little bit of a hypochondriac.
I have had numerous tests - including ekg's, sonograms on my heart, and have worn a monitor twice and it all comes back ok. My bp is a little high at times but it is normally anxiety causing it. Also, my cholestoral is good. I have damaged muscles in my left shoulder that causes a lot of pain and numbness on my left side and into my face. That doesn't help with my fears. I am afraid to run, ride a bike, go on a roller coaster or do anything else that may get my heart beating fast because I am afraid I will die. I have muscle spasms in my back and chest and I am convinced these are mini heart attacks. I am on anxiety meds and bp meds. I have preeclampsia with my youngest child and caused me to have high bp. I am better than I was - believe it or not. For about a year I couldn't drive and I barely left my house. going out to eat or to a school function for my kids was out of the question because I was afraid of dying there. I just want to stop being afraid. I want my life back. I know that the chances of me having a heart attack at a young age are slim - yet I still live in constant fear. Also I should tell you that my dad is the ONLY person in my very large family that died of a heart attack. His parents and siblings and my mom's family have never had heart problems of any kind. Still - I worry constantly. sorry this is so long. Thank you for reading.

[CharlieM]

Jamie,

I could have written this. I am absolutely convinced I am going to have a heart attack all day every day. Like you, my family history is the same. Only 1 member of my family died of a heart attack, my father aged 40. I am now 43, so I suspect some of my fear is related to my Dad.

I get left sided pain as well, and when it is at it worst, I am paralysed with fear. I can no longer drive and rarely go out in case I drop dead in public.

I know I have anxiety with occasional panic attacks. I also know that my physical symptoms can be caused by anxiety. But when they are happening, I cannot think rationally.

I try and tell myself that I would have had a heart attack by now because this has been going on for over 8 months.

We both need to try and accept the symptoms for what they are, and allow them to wash over us without fearing death.

Hope you are feeling better today.

Charlie

[jaynehal]

Hi there

Sorry your feeling like this and I know the feeling completely although my dad didn't die of a heart attach he died of cancer and now I have constant fears about that nearly everyday infact the last two years I have suffered bad with my health anxiety and have had numerous Cbt sessions which do help a little. I think when we go through the traumatic time of losing someone close it is normal to feel worried but I have been told to control my worrying thoughts and get on with life as I'm missing out on so much when I'm miserable.

I hope you get through this bad time soon x