Adam Thompson
04-06-13, 21:01
Ive suffered Anxiety/depression/ocd for many many years.
Last year or so hasnt been too bad ive learnt over many years avoidance tactics for my problems which is obsessions, i obsess over hobbys, when i get bored of that hobby i get a new one and obsess spending every minute thinking about my obsessions.
These past few months ive had some stark realisations, that im deeply deeply unhappy with my life, existence and lonliness
I work a dead end job 9-5 which is ok to be fair, but ok isnt doing it anymore
i have a girfriend and 3 kids which is great but i need more
i lost touch with all my friends over 10 yrs ago shortly after leaving school, ive had no one for years. ive joined loads of clubs, tried to make friends etc but social anx stops me.
At the moment i feel like jumping on a plane or jumping off a cliff (not suicidal btw) its like i NEED to do something, i just dont know what, i feel so deeply depressed about my existance, get up go to work, come home, sleep, no friends etc. Its torture i cry almost every day thinking what a waste of existance.
Just wanted to vent really, ive been thinking about quitting my job and trying to go self employed, even though i know financially this isnt a great thing to do and i may well fail, its come to the point where i need to focus on something and just do something with my life, i dont know if thats the answer but i cant go on like this, its tearing me apart. Im angry all the time, i have spells where i think im ok and try be positive then it all comes tuumbling down again.
Last year or so hasnt been too bad ive learnt over many years avoidance tactics for my problems which is obsessions, i obsess over hobbys, when i get bored of that hobby i get a new one and obsess spending every minute thinking about my obsessions.
These past few months ive had some stark realisations, that im deeply deeply unhappy with my life, existence and lonliness
I work a dead end job 9-5 which is ok to be fair, but ok isnt doing it anymore
i have a girfriend and 3 kids which is great but i need more
i lost touch with all my friends over 10 yrs ago shortly after leaving school, ive had no one for years. ive joined loads of clubs, tried to make friends etc but social anx stops me.
At the moment i feel like jumping on a plane or jumping off a cliff (not suicidal btw) its like i NEED to do something, i just dont know what, i feel so deeply depressed about my existance, get up go to work, come home, sleep, no friends etc. Its torture i cry almost every day thinking what a waste of existance.
Just wanted to vent really, ive been thinking about quitting my job and trying to go self employed, even though i know financially this isnt a great thing to do and i may well fail, its come to the point where i need to focus on something and just do something with my life, i dont know if thats the answer but i cant go on like this, its tearing me apart. Im angry all the time, i have spells where i think im ok and try be positive then it all comes tuumbling down again.