redbaron
04-10-06, 01:45
I am glad I found my way here, it made me realise that even if I am mad I am not alone and that revelation came at a time when I really felt I was.
However in recent times things have not been good and today was the final straw. I cannot stand by and watch my friends be hurt. I find it strange that some people feel they are able to rally round a wounded comrade and yet I am not.
I do not do threatening or violent and tonight I nearly lost it properly for the first time in over 20 years, this opens up a whole new can of worms which I did not think I was going to have to face just yet. I have enough problems being back at work for the first time in 4 months and the meds playing merry hell with my mental state to start going loco again.
I'm sorry if my behaviour offended anyone, suffice to say I had my reasons and they were good ones even if the implementation was crude. My only regret is that I was not able to step in early enough to save people I care about the inexorable hurt that has now been caused.
I can no longer go onto the chat and give myself unconditionally to new people and that is unfair and a dereliction of the purpose for which it is there. I am a communicative person and new people do not need jaded rhetoric and warnings they need help and compassion.
I wish everyone help, happiness and recovery, even those I have fought with. We are all part of life's rich tapestry and in a different place at a different time who knows what may have happened.
I would like to offer my heartfelt thanks to certain people who talked me down during times when the meds sent me up the crazy tree. You all know who you are, thank you. Anyone who wishes to stay in touch is welcome to send me a message and I'll share my msn/aim for when I come back on. I have not made this post as some draw attention to me attempt merely to explain to people not about why I am not around and to reassure them that I will be ok.
alles gute Leute, hiermit ist der rote baron verabschiedet.
Dom x
If what doesn't kill us makes us stronger it's a pretty fair bet it's going to hurt.
However in recent times things have not been good and today was the final straw. I cannot stand by and watch my friends be hurt. I find it strange that some people feel they are able to rally round a wounded comrade and yet I am not.
I do not do threatening or violent and tonight I nearly lost it properly for the first time in over 20 years, this opens up a whole new can of worms which I did not think I was going to have to face just yet. I have enough problems being back at work for the first time in 4 months and the meds playing merry hell with my mental state to start going loco again.
I'm sorry if my behaviour offended anyone, suffice to say I had my reasons and they were good ones even if the implementation was crude. My only regret is that I was not able to step in early enough to save people I care about the inexorable hurt that has now been caused.
I can no longer go onto the chat and give myself unconditionally to new people and that is unfair and a dereliction of the purpose for which it is there. I am a communicative person and new people do not need jaded rhetoric and warnings they need help and compassion.
I wish everyone help, happiness and recovery, even those I have fought with. We are all part of life's rich tapestry and in a different place at a different time who knows what may have happened.
I would like to offer my heartfelt thanks to certain people who talked me down during times when the meds sent me up the crazy tree. You all know who you are, thank you. Anyone who wishes to stay in touch is welcome to send me a message and I'll share my msn/aim for when I come back on. I have not made this post as some draw attention to me attempt merely to explain to people not about why I am not around and to reassure them that I will be ok.
alles gute Leute, hiermit ist der rote baron verabschiedet.
Dom x
If what doesn't kill us makes us stronger it's a pretty fair bet it's going to hurt.