Well that was easier than I thought

[venusbluejeans]

I have never driven on a motorway even before my anx and panic, mainly because I did not have to go on one to get to anywhere I needed to go….

During my last spell of anx and Panic I stopped driving, I did not feel safe driving at all due to big problems with depersonalisation/derealisation and driving became a major source of my anxiety.

I came to realise though that that wasn’t going to get better unless I pushed myself more, NOTHING works better against anx and panic like your determination to get better, your determination to make things happen….

Doing things in little steps not in huge leaps will get you where you want to be and it is really quite hard work to make your brain believe that.
I started driving again quite a long time back now and got so I am just about anx free when I am driving… J

Joining NMP I made a few very special friends, that I wanted to meet up with. The main one being the Lovely Nic (nomorepanic). Nic and I have met several times before BUT there is one thing between us that can still bring me to my knees in panic….

Meet my nemesis the A1m….4 lanes of motorway that sits between Nic and I’s house.



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A couple of times before I had arranged to go to Nic's house but had to end up pulling out due to long nights awake panicking about the prospect of driving on that bit of road. Every time we have met before we meet before the A1m so I did not have to drive on ‘that’ road. (Apart from once when I was not driving)

So anyway on Thursday I was feeling good so again arranged to drive down to Nic’s on the Friday and down the A1m *gulp*

I was expecting the sleepless night awake with anxiety, but that never happened hmmm how strange no anxiety when I wanted to push myself more.

I was expecting to wake up anxious too, but that never happened either Hmmm really strange.

Ok so let’s get in the car with my mum and start to drive….ummm where has my anx gone???

drive along the A1 and onto the A1M in the pouring rain…..hey this is good I can pass all of these slow things that are normally in my way on these 4 lanes….a bit busy though *gulp* but still where has my anx gone??

Spent a few hours in the company of Nic and Alex (thank you for everything Ms Pinney and Mr G xx) and get ready to drive home again, at least it has stopped raining now though.

*sigh* even busier now….spent 3 miles driving at an average of just 5mph….not even a hint of anxiety in the really heavy traffic. Back along the A1m, even getting frustrated at the slower drivers and wanting to pass them, ooohhh I am liking these 4 lanes now :yesyes:

Shattered when I get home, but that is the driving for 3 hours that has done that…..Wow, really what was I worried about before? There is nothing to this driving on motorways thing really.

REALLY proves to me though that it is definitely the thinking about things rather than the doing things….. Your brain tells you that you cannot do things when really you can…. You just need to try and maybe you will start to believe you can!

This may not seem a big thing to others and others may have a totally different obstacle in the way stopping them doing what they want to do, but hopefully it proves that obstacles can be overcome, you need to take little steps forward and good things will come to you……..Standing still is NOT an option!!


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All a bit wet and slippy Buy I did it :yesyes:


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Hmmm a little bit of traffic in front!!


Emmz :flowers::flowers:

[flori]

:yesyes::bighug1:

Very well done Venus, you must be really proud of yourself.

That is one of my fears too -- driving.

I will only drive locally about my small town.

Before I see therapist in 2 weeks, I have to drive a wee bit further, but definitely not a motorway.

Well done again.

[Speranza]

Well done! You must feel so proud of yourself! :yahoo::yesyes::flowers::yahoo:

[venusbluejeans]

Thank you, you two :hugs: :yahoo:

[Tessar]

Waaaah this is amazing, it's a huge achievement, really it is. I admire the strength if character you have shown to do this.
It doesn't matter whether this is a big deal to anyone else. It's what it means to you that counts. And that's why it's so good what you did.

And in terms of "standing still not being an option" ..... You are so right!

Do you know what? I was driving back from holiday today.... Quite a long way, my partner and I shared the driving. I enjoy driving but sometimes get edgy if I am driving my partners car (she makes me feel self conscious & sometimes is critical which makes me worse)... But today I relaxed and enjoyed it. I am fed up with feeling self-conscious, nervous etc and am doing all i can to put that right.

Funnily enough though, while I was on the motorway I was thinking about people here at NMP who don't like motorway driving or driving generally. Probably about the same time you would have been having your motorway experience, Emmz! You did so well, I am impressed!

Oh I meant to say... Isn't it amazing how quite often when we do something e think is too scary or difficult to achieve, it turns out to be ok!!

[AuntieMoosie]

Wow!!! Emmz I'm sooooooo proud of you :yesyes:

I think you did fantastic, that's a very big task to undertake which takes one hell of a lot of courage and bravery, and you did it, and defeated your anxiety/panic, you confronted it head on Emmz and I know just how hard that is to do :yesyes:

Big congrats to you, now soak in all that success hun :D


Wooooohoooooo you go Emmz! this nutty Moosie Moo is very proud of you :yahoo: :hugs: :yesyes: xxx

[nomorepanic]

Emmz

http://zanyimages.com/Sports%20Lovers/Well%20Done%20%21.jpg


Thank You for coming to see us yesterday and GO YOU!

You did fantastic as I know how much that A1 has been a nemesis for you.

It is interesting how we all perceive a threat in different ways. The A1 (m) with 4 lanes is my ideal road - loads of room and a hard shoulder too. Yet for me the A1 where Emmz went and sat in traffic for a long time would have freaked me out big time as there was no escape.

It was lovely to see you again and I am sure we will meet up again soon and now you have conquered the A1 you have gained so much confidence as well.

Well done my friend xxxxx

[bluesparkle]

oh my god !!!! well done you :yesyes::yesyes::yesyes:
how brilliant ....
it is odd how we all have very different things but they scare us all just as much.
I love reading success stories.
there will be no stopping you now
well done emz
x

[ricardo]

Well done Emmz ,in fact fantastic. I would suggest you now go and buy a new hat.:winks:

So many of us suffered our first panic attack whilst driving (I think Nic did herself) and to conquer that fear and also being held up in traffic would absolutely freak me out, even as a passenger.

I can only admire you :hugs::hugs:

[jefferina]

Really inspiring message. Thanks for writing it. Im at the beginning of cbt therapy at the min and just starting to take them little steps. This has encouraged me to keep trying...
Thanks x

[venusbluejeans]

Oh Wow just catching up with my thread and found all of these replies!

A Big Big thank you to all of you for taking the time to reply :hugs:

Hopefully it will be a help to people too.

Nic... I will be over for Sunday Dinner haha :D

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Emmz xxxxxxx :flowers::flowers::hugs: