help! agrophobia/anxiety -travel

[wiz1]

hi,i wonder if anyone can help. i have chronic anxiety and agrophobia when about 1 mile from home-my mum is very ill,i am in sheffield she is near bournemouth. but i havent being out of sheffield for 8yrs-my doc has prescribed 15mg diazepam one off dose to help me travel-but these dont have effect long enough for journey,there are no flights from doncaster/sheffield to bournemouth or southampton. please can anyone help or suggest anything? thanks wiz

[Daisy Sue]

How will you be travelling? If you're going to be a passenger in a car, or train/coach, then take things with you that give you comfort at home.. like a favourite cushion to cuddle, or something scented like lavender/olbas oil.. and some sugary sweets to chew on.. also have a look at the route and plan when you can have stops for a walk about. If you just take the journey in sections, it will be easier than doing it in one straight run.

I hate long car journeys, and I find it helps if I follow a roadmap so I can see how far till we stop - and I take my little laptop with me & play mindless games (lol) - that's if I'm a passenger. I never really get nervous if I'm driving myself.

[wiz1]

thanx for that.but i really an't cope with-need something to knock me out completely-am terrified-wish could beam me up as on star trek! thanx

[lollypopgirl1981]

i do feel for you...but the biggest thing to keep telling yourself is...you can do this and its not going to hurt or harm you in anyway and you never know once you have done it...it might make you less worried about going out abit further when u get home...im at present trying to prevent myself from becoming like that...as was and am getting to a stage where i dont want to go out to shops and funcations...and i dont want that to happen...i keep saying i have to talk myself out of this...i know things are easyier said than done trust me...but you can do this for your mum...big huge hugs xxx

[Tufty]

You can and will do this, focus on the end result and that is supporting your mum, do it for her.

10 years ago I was agoraphobic and highly anxious even when at home. I found a doctor in Harley Street who specialised in womans health because at the time I was suffering with hormone problems and my doctors couldn't decide what was wrong and put me on steroids - which led to depression. Anyway, I decided the way forward was to go to London to see him, 200 miles away. For days before the trip I didn't sleep or eat and felt there was no way I was going to make it. On the day I took some Diazepam before leaving, another one about 70 miles away from home when we got stuck in traffic but I made it there in one piece, a little dazed but overjoyed. I was OK the whole day we were there and all the way home too, no Diazepam, I think the euphoria of getting there overrode my anxiety.

How much do you want to see your mum? If it is important to you and you want to do it, you can and will. Make a plan of when to take the Diazepam, where you will be stopping. I took food, blankets, books and had planned to lie down in the back of the car if it got too bad, but it didn't I daydreamed out of the window for most of the journey.

Agoraphobia is awful but it can be overcome, I returned to work, I have had foreign holidays, been on spa weekends with the girls and travelled up and down the country both as a driver and passenger. 8 years is a long time to be stuck in one city and this is the turning point for you to get your life back. Are you taking any other medication or having any therapy?

Sam x

[Col]

hi,i wonder if anyone can help. i have chronic anxiety and agrophobia when about 1 mile from home-my mum is very ill,i am in sheffield she is near bournemouth. but i havent being out of sheffield for 8yrs-my doc has prescribed 15mg diazepam one off dose to help me travel-but these dont have effect long enough for journey,there are no flights from doncaster/sheffield to bournemouth or southampton. please can anyone help or suggest anything? thanks wiz

IM in Sheffield too:yesyes:

Which area do you live in, if you don't mind me asking, we could get together coffee morning or something and try that slowly to get you out.

I was agrophobic for 6 months in 2011 the world the light just seemed weired - combined by random panic attacks induced by years of family trouble reduced me to an absolute wreck. I've got kids as well so just an awful situation.

Bless you I still don't think id Be able to travel that far, if I'm completely honest BUT if your mum is sooo unwell , that's a tough one?

I'm lucky my family all live in Sheffield. Ohhh bless you, I think though if one of my close relatives were very ill, my perspective would shift slightly and I'd have to go...... Maybe sedated or I'd force myself to sleep. Bachs herbal gum, sweets, tapping exercises, music.

Let us know how you get on:hugs:

[wiz1]

thank you so much for your replies. lollypop girl thanx 4 the hugs and xx's makes me feel less alone. col thanks mebbe when this situation is sorted could meet up-i'm in s5. sam-i felt like crying when i read yours as it gave me hope-tho am still terrified!
thank you so very much to all,i am lucky that i have brothers who live down south(mum was visiting when taken ill-shes from doncaster) who are willing to come and collect me and bring me back and cousins who arewilling to take me. but the terror is really badat the mo-but working out a plan after your advice!!

[Col]

thank you so much for your replies. lollypop girl thanx 4 the hugs and xx's makes me feel less alone. col thanks mebbe when this situation is sorted could meet up-i'm in s5. sam-i felt like crying when i read yours as it gave me hope-tho am still terrified!
thank you so very much to all,i am lucky that i have brothers who live down south(mum was visiting when taken ill-shes from doncaster) who are willing to come and collect me and bring me back and cousins who arewilling to take me. but the terror is really badat the mo-but working out a plan after your advice!!

Ahh my mums in S5 - let me know how u get on xx

[wiz1]

thanks for your support everyone.i decided my head rather than heart in the end-wasworriedi would haveanxiety whilst there and worry mum when she was very ill. on saturday 6th july i was able to talk to mum via skype and tell her how much i love her and that she was best mum in the world. on sunday i talked to her again,telling her how much i loved her-we also laughed together because her dog had eaten some sherry trifle my sister in law made for her from a recipe i sent her passed down to me via great gran,gran and mum. my mum went to sleep sunday evening and didn't wake,she died monday evening. it hasn't hit me yet,mainly i'm just glad that mum wasn't ill or in pain for long. her funeral is 8th august in doncaster-hopefully i will be able to travel there. thank you so much for your support/advice. liz

[kittikat]

So sorry to hear your sad news and thinking of you and your family at this time.

I am glad you had the opportunity to talk to your mum on Skype and tell her how you felt and make her laugh too. That must be of some comfort to you.

My sincere condolences to you. Kitti :hugs: xx

[Col]

thanks for your support everyone.i decided my head rather than heart in the end-wasworriedi would haveanxiety whilst there and worry mum when she was very ill. on saturday 6th july i was able to talk to mum via skype and tell her how much i love her and that she was best mum in the world. on sunday i talked to her again,telling her how much i loved her-we also laughed together because her dog had eaten some sherry trifle my sister in law made for her from a recipe i sent her passed down to me via great gran,gran and mum. my mum went to sleep sunday evening and didn't wake,she died monday evening. it hasn't hit me yet,mainly i'm just glad that mum wasn't ill or in pain for long. her funeral is 8th august in doncaster-hopefully i will be able to travel there. thank you so much for your support/advice. liz

Ahhhh heartbroken 4 you, gosh, I'm soo sorry.:flowers:

[wiz1]

thank you. bin a tough time. its not hit me yet-havent cried yet. i just want to get thru the memorial service and start grieving-assuming i can get there! my cousin has offered to pick me up next wk when my 2 brothers are coming up to sort mums flat out,so that i can join them-in doncaster-so this will be a practice run. she said i can smoke,booze,have a spliff-do what i want in her her car as long as it helps me get there! tempting to do all 3!!!(only kidding!) its going to be hard,but the journey is shorter-about 45 mins and i'm going to a place thats familiar-my home village-and my brothers and other relations will be there. so fingers crossed. thanks for your support. liz

[Daisy Sue]

I'm so sorry, Liz :(

Wishing you strength & courage to get through these sad days.. & thinking of you. x