RichardWilliams
04-07-13, 01:21
Hello there. I used to take Citolopram for basically anxiety (and depression which came from the anxiety because I couldn't get on with my life despite trying so hard for so long). Anyway, the citolopram really did work for me and I felt motivated and awake and I wanted to learn things, and my mind didn't dwell on negative things at all, I was upbeat and positive and happy (some may say a little too happy, but I was just so thrilled to be able to live my life as I should have done all along).
The only problem for me with citolopram was that it killed my libido, so when I wanted to get a girlfriend I inevitably either couldn't have sex at all, or couldn't experience orgasm or ejaculation, and I didn't actually have any interest in sex at all, except to build human intimate connections, but I didn't crave it as such - I had no libido.
So I would stop taking it so that my sex drive returned, until my mental state would deteriorate to the point of me being a complete and utter mess, then I would take more pills to get my mind back in gear, which would get rid of my sex drive again. I continued doing this for a few years.
I tried many ways to overcome my problem, such as trying out many different sexual enhancement pills, but these would only work when I didn't take the citolopram so it was pretty pointless.
I tried to lower my dose and eat ultra-healthy and exercise everyday whilst taking the pills everyday. I also completely abstrained from any alcohol. Doing this I felt pretty happy and well rounded and my body was pretty good and in shape, and I felt good. I was hoping the healthy eating and working out would bring back my sex drive but it didn't. The best I could hope for was a weak erection and perhaps a weak orgasm once a week - clearly no good for a sexual relationship.
I then decided it was best to wean off them altogether and get back to 'normal'. I tried all sorts of therapies like hypnotherapy and alternative therapy and counselling etc to get my mind right so I could cope with coming off the pills, but nothing really worked; the negative impact of the withdrawal would overide any possible positive gains these therapies might've brought.
Anyway, I met a great woman just over a couple of years ago, and she was with me as I weaned off these pills very slowly. I had a diary and would write down exactly how much I should take and on what days until I was free.
I did finally get free of the pills, and felt alright for a while. But then anxiety and panic would creep back in. This anxiety wasn't the result of the withdrawalm, It was just me, so I concluded I must be completely fu**ed and this is how I am. I didn't want to live like that and I researched alternatives on the internet called 'Nootropics'. Don't know if anyone's ever heard of them but they're drugs for the brain, to enhance it. I won't name them here, but I used one which relaxed me and it was brilliant for a while. For about 6 months I felt great, was on top form and could have great sex as well! Perfect.
But the effects wore off, as it's well known that you build tolerance to it and then it stops working.
I still tried others, each with some degree of success, but basically, I began to deteriorate and become a mess again. Now I'm pretty much not myself anymore and feel shy and inhibited all the time.
So I've booked in with the doctors after a couple of episodes of being a complete and utter mess.
So what do I do now? Do I go back to square one and be beck on an SSRI which kills the sex drive and have to go through all this all over again? Is there an SSRI which doesn't kill the sex drive or at least would work in conjunction with sex pills? In America you can get one called Wellbutin which is like a dopamine re-uptake inhibitor, and that one is well known to actually increase libido. But they don't give it out here in England. Although there is a websiteI've seen which can supply it, I messaged them and nobody got back to me. Or do I keep trying these Nootropics and hop I find one that helps?
One other problem I'be got BTW, is my wife doesn't want me to go back on medication, let alone sex pills (as she'd think I don't find her attractive) so I'm trying to get this sorted on my own. Once I can think straight properly and my personality comes back I'll be able to chat about it, until then it's too hard to explain to people.
The only problem for me with citolopram was that it killed my libido, so when I wanted to get a girlfriend I inevitably either couldn't have sex at all, or couldn't experience orgasm or ejaculation, and I didn't actually have any interest in sex at all, except to build human intimate connections, but I didn't crave it as such - I had no libido.
So I would stop taking it so that my sex drive returned, until my mental state would deteriorate to the point of me being a complete and utter mess, then I would take more pills to get my mind back in gear, which would get rid of my sex drive again. I continued doing this for a few years.
I tried many ways to overcome my problem, such as trying out many different sexual enhancement pills, but these would only work when I didn't take the citolopram so it was pretty pointless.
I tried to lower my dose and eat ultra-healthy and exercise everyday whilst taking the pills everyday. I also completely abstrained from any alcohol. Doing this I felt pretty happy and well rounded and my body was pretty good and in shape, and I felt good. I was hoping the healthy eating and working out would bring back my sex drive but it didn't. The best I could hope for was a weak erection and perhaps a weak orgasm once a week - clearly no good for a sexual relationship.
I then decided it was best to wean off them altogether and get back to 'normal'. I tried all sorts of therapies like hypnotherapy and alternative therapy and counselling etc to get my mind right so I could cope with coming off the pills, but nothing really worked; the negative impact of the withdrawal would overide any possible positive gains these therapies might've brought.
Anyway, I met a great woman just over a couple of years ago, and she was with me as I weaned off these pills very slowly. I had a diary and would write down exactly how much I should take and on what days until I was free.
I did finally get free of the pills, and felt alright for a while. But then anxiety and panic would creep back in. This anxiety wasn't the result of the withdrawalm, It was just me, so I concluded I must be completely fu**ed and this is how I am. I didn't want to live like that and I researched alternatives on the internet called 'Nootropics'. Don't know if anyone's ever heard of them but they're drugs for the brain, to enhance it. I won't name them here, but I used one which relaxed me and it was brilliant for a while. For about 6 months I felt great, was on top form and could have great sex as well! Perfect.
But the effects wore off, as it's well known that you build tolerance to it and then it stops working.
I still tried others, each with some degree of success, but basically, I began to deteriorate and become a mess again. Now I'm pretty much not myself anymore and feel shy and inhibited all the time.
So I've booked in with the doctors after a couple of episodes of being a complete and utter mess.
So what do I do now? Do I go back to square one and be beck on an SSRI which kills the sex drive and have to go through all this all over again? Is there an SSRI which doesn't kill the sex drive or at least would work in conjunction with sex pills? In America you can get one called Wellbutin which is like a dopamine re-uptake inhibitor, and that one is well known to actually increase libido. But they don't give it out here in England. Although there is a websiteI've seen which can supply it, I messaged them and nobody got back to me. Or do I keep trying these Nootropics and hop I find one that helps?
One other problem I'be got BTW, is my wife doesn't want me to go back on medication, let alone sex pills (as she'd think I don't find her attractive) so I'm trying to get this sorted on my own. Once I can think straight properly and my personality comes back I'll be able to chat about it, until then it's too hard to explain to people.