Psychosis/Schizophrenia - In China and extremely worked up

[ben_jamzin]

Hello,

I suffer from health anxiety but over the years my obsessions have moved towards developing a severe mental illness (namely schizophrenia).

I have spent far too much time reading up on the illness (much like how many people research heart diseases etc...). I am currently working in China and am at the receiving end of extreme anxiety today, particularly surrounding the prospect of developing a serious issue. Whilst I am fully aware that I am not currently experiencing a state of psychosis I am concerned that I am going through the prodromal or beginning phase of the illness - a number of times today I have been convinced of this.

My main symptom is constantly checking my surroundings and on occasion believing I am seeing people I live with through the corner of my eye, only to turn and look at that person and finding they are not there. I am utterly terrified and convinced I need to seek help but I am currently living in a small city in China where the state of mental health care and counselling is practically non existent.

Can anybody help me? Please share your experiences, have you felt anything like this? I am also consistently worried that I will develop paranoid thoughts and put myself under intense self analysis to try and diagnose myself. If there is anybody here who has a good knowledge or even a medical background in dealing with serious mental illness, would you please be able to shed some light on my situation?

I have seen a counsellor at home numerous times who has reassured me that I am not going to develop a serious disorder and that I do not present any signs of the illness, but I cannot stop being frightened at the shapes and people I appear to be seeing out of the corner of my eye.

Many thanks,

[joelhall]

I certainly don't think you have schizophrenia if that helps at all?

[venusbluejeans]

To be honest if you are asking if you have Schizophrenia then you don't

People with Schizophrenia, wouldn't ask if they have it, because to them it is 'normal'

If that makes any sense lol

[ben_jamzin]

Hi guys many thanks for your replies,

As I mentioned in the post I do realise I do not currently have schizophrenia - I am more concerned that I am developing it and experiencing minor versions of the symptoms which will develop into something larger...

[Freaked]

Before I came down with severe post-viral issues in February (and subsequent HA), I was a final year psychology student doing my research thesis on schizophrenia, and I have also spoken with a number of recovering schizophrenics lately. Schizophrenia and anxiety disorders do not tend to share ground for some reason. Schizophrenia and depression yes, but in a way health anxiety is the opposite of schizophrenia psychologically speaking.

Anxiety disorders are like being too in touch with reality. In a distorted way maybe, but people's concerns tend to be real ones about their health or being in public or whatever, just blown way out of proportion. Psychosis involves jumping to conclusions that could never be logical, and basically completely inventing your own reality lacking in normal laws. Psychosis can involve paranoia, but rarely anxiety in the way people here have it. If you were in the prodromal phase, then it's certainly not the same as the first-hand accounts I've heard and read. To me, it sounds way more like you've just developed severe HA about a mental illness of all things. I can't say for certain of course, and if you start having actual and for real hallucinations (and believe me you'd know) don't ignore them, but anxiety disorders don't just 'develop' into psychosis and you seem way too in touch with reality for it.