asf259
16-07-13, 03:37
Dear all,
I have some important resit exams coming up at the end of September and I'm really struggling with staying focussed and my concentration seems at rock bottom. I'm struggling retaining and recalling info and am getting really anxious because this is my last attempt at staying on in this course. I had to wait a year for university appeals to go through and to get this one chance, so the stakes are really high...but I just can't shake off these feelings of helplessness and just hunker down to the books. I'm trying to get up and go to the library etc, but end up just feeling really drained and staying in bed.
I messed up my exams in June '12, which was my 7th month of restarting Fluoxetine 40mg. I spent the months leading to the exams oversleeping and being nocturnal. I'd spend upto 15hrs a day asleep, despite my best efforts, missed morning lectures and in the exam period I ended up studying through the night, going in for the exam, then coming back and sleeping. Because of this routine, I also ended up missing an exam.
Since then I was prescribed Citalopram 20mg which I took regularly till Sep '12, when I was informed that I would not be allowed to sit the resits. Then started a long appeal process against the Uni during which I got even more desperate and dejected. I stopped taking the meds out of frustration, but did start some CBT sessions. CBT helped me learn to stop catastrophising and understand how to try and stop the negative thought cycles, but I still struggle to put it to practise sometimes.
This is all on a background of a previous depressive episode that lasted a few years ('04-'07). I was then okay for a couple of years until my marriage collapsed at the end of '10.
Right now, I am getting really desperate. I'm wasting days not being productive and getting frustrated at how low I'm feeling. I keep being reminded of how high the stakes are, and if I fail these exams again I really don't know what I would do. I'm considering restarting Citalopram, but I am worried about the adverse effects it has on concentration and if my sleep issues just return just like last June.
I need something to just give me a boost, a kick-start so I can stop feeling sorry for myself and get proactive. No amount of coffee or cigarettes are helping. My biggest worry is that if I start something new, the number of weeks they tend to take for the full therapeutic levels to be reached will mean I won't have much time before the exams. I'm also worried about being told off by my GP for stopping the Citalopram.
I realise this has become quite a long post, but I would appreciate any advice or recommendations anyone can provide.
I have some important resit exams coming up at the end of September and I'm really struggling with staying focussed and my concentration seems at rock bottom. I'm struggling retaining and recalling info and am getting really anxious because this is my last attempt at staying on in this course. I had to wait a year for university appeals to go through and to get this one chance, so the stakes are really high...but I just can't shake off these feelings of helplessness and just hunker down to the books. I'm trying to get up and go to the library etc, but end up just feeling really drained and staying in bed.
I messed up my exams in June '12, which was my 7th month of restarting Fluoxetine 40mg. I spent the months leading to the exams oversleeping and being nocturnal. I'd spend upto 15hrs a day asleep, despite my best efforts, missed morning lectures and in the exam period I ended up studying through the night, going in for the exam, then coming back and sleeping. Because of this routine, I also ended up missing an exam.
Since then I was prescribed Citalopram 20mg which I took regularly till Sep '12, when I was informed that I would not be allowed to sit the resits. Then started a long appeal process against the Uni during which I got even more desperate and dejected. I stopped taking the meds out of frustration, but did start some CBT sessions. CBT helped me learn to stop catastrophising and understand how to try and stop the negative thought cycles, but I still struggle to put it to practise sometimes.
This is all on a background of a previous depressive episode that lasted a few years ('04-'07). I was then okay for a couple of years until my marriage collapsed at the end of '10.
Right now, I am getting really desperate. I'm wasting days not being productive and getting frustrated at how low I'm feeling. I keep being reminded of how high the stakes are, and if I fail these exams again I really don't know what I would do. I'm considering restarting Citalopram, but I am worried about the adverse effects it has on concentration and if my sleep issues just return just like last June.
I need something to just give me a boost, a kick-start so I can stop feeling sorry for myself and get proactive. No amount of coffee or cigarettes are helping. My biggest worry is that if I start something new, the number of weeks they tend to take for the full therapeutic levels to be reached will mean I won't have much time before the exams. I'm also worried about being told off by my GP for stopping the Citalopram.
I realise this has become quite a long post, but I would appreciate any advice or recommendations anyone can provide.