girlrock
21-07-13, 07:05
Hi everyone! I'm going to apologize in advance as this might be a bit long-winded. I'm just turning into a ball of anxiety of as lately. I'd hightail it back to the GP and get back on my beloved Paxil if it weren't for the fact that my husband and I want to start a family soon. I've considered myself to have beaten HA around 2008 with mostly just habit changes (not allowing myself to Google, etc.). Then I considered myself to be completely rid of it while on Paxil for 2-3 years. Now I have been off of Paxil for exactly a year and my HA seems to be coming back with a vengeance. Basically, I have a wide array of symptoms (the biggest one being a breast lump that's extremely sore, probably from me poking at it) and basically just have myself convinced that I probably have Stage 4 cancer (since I have multiple symptoms) and I'm going to die.
Current nagging symptom of the day: For 2 days now, I am having this unpredictable stab in one part of my head (I'd say directly up from my temple but more on top of my head). It's not that debilitating ice pick type headache, although I would describe it as ice pick-like in nature. It comes at unexpected intervals but frequently. I do get migraines but they are usually whole head migraines. This is really freaking me out. It started yesterday afternoon and continued until around supper time which at that point I took a migraine pill. The stabs subsided for about 2 hours until we went to see a movie (a scary movie--anxiety??) then they picked up again. Then we went out for a few drinks afterwards and they completely stopped. However, I woke up again this morning and had the stabs, same unpredictable frequency, same exact spot on my head again all day.
Now part of me says, well dummy, you probably have a type of migraine and you just made it worse by drinking last night. Hopefully, tomorrow when I am completely normal again and not in any way hungover, I will be completely better. I just need some reassurance for tonight.
The thing I am MOST scared about is the fact that it is the SAME spot in my head EVERY time and for two days. What if I have a tumor? A hematoma? OMG!!!! What if it's all going back to the breast lump that must be cancerous and the cancer is spreading through my body?! My friends just laugh at me but I knew you guys would understand.
Oh some other background...I had a miscarriage with an unexpected pregnancy in March. I carry extreme guilt and blame from the miscarriage and fear that I'll never conceive again (not that we are trying). So maybe that's part of it? Miscarriage-->guilt, blame-->never have another chance--->I have cancer that's why I lost the baby and I'll never have another one. UGHHHH!! THIS SUCKS TO FEEL THIS WAY AND FEEL SO LOST!!!
Thanks in advance. I always credit this wonderful forum for helping me to (previously) cure my HA :)
Current nagging symptom of the day: For 2 days now, I am having this unpredictable stab in one part of my head (I'd say directly up from my temple but more on top of my head). It's not that debilitating ice pick type headache, although I would describe it as ice pick-like in nature. It comes at unexpected intervals but frequently. I do get migraines but they are usually whole head migraines. This is really freaking me out. It started yesterday afternoon and continued until around supper time which at that point I took a migraine pill. The stabs subsided for about 2 hours until we went to see a movie (a scary movie--anxiety??) then they picked up again. Then we went out for a few drinks afterwards and they completely stopped. However, I woke up again this morning and had the stabs, same unpredictable frequency, same exact spot on my head again all day.
Now part of me says, well dummy, you probably have a type of migraine and you just made it worse by drinking last night. Hopefully, tomorrow when I am completely normal again and not in any way hungover, I will be completely better. I just need some reassurance for tonight.
The thing I am MOST scared about is the fact that it is the SAME spot in my head EVERY time and for two days. What if I have a tumor? A hematoma? OMG!!!! What if it's all going back to the breast lump that must be cancerous and the cancer is spreading through my body?! My friends just laugh at me but I knew you guys would understand.
Oh some other background...I had a miscarriage with an unexpected pregnancy in March. I carry extreme guilt and blame from the miscarriage and fear that I'll never conceive again (not that we are trying). So maybe that's part of it? Miscarriage-->guilt, blame-->never have another chance--->I have cancer that's why I lost the baby and I'll never have another one. UGHHHH!! THIS SUCKS TO FEEL THIS WAY AND FEEL SO LOST!!!
Thanks in advance. I always credit this wonderful forum for helping me to (previously) cure my HA :)