Yet another intrusive sexual thoughts thread.

[chalky500]

Right, here goes. My intrusive sexual thoughts have become so convincing that when looking at someone i legitimately believe i feel something for them. IS THIS POSSIBLE NOT TO BE REAL? I bloody hope so, i feel like a sick human and am scared that it'll be real and i'll be kicked out on the street and everyone who loves me will abandon me. I know this isn't true but i can't seem to convince myself that the thoughts aren't real. I can't tell the difference, i think, between finding someone attractive and understanding, from a neutral point of view, that they look good. Opinions greatly appreciated. By the way I'm 15 and suffer from incest and some extent of pedo thoughts.

[Col]

Hi chalky, can tell this is really getting to you!
I've had intrusive thoughts But, not of this nature, but what I can tell u is, the more you think about them and how sick & out of character these thoughts are........ The more you think about /analyse the thoughts , questioning & punishing yourself.

Vicious circle - comes to mind!

Distraction was key for me & time was a factor, sometimes as quick,as these thoughts start they're suddenly gone!

I would advise though if you think you are going mad & may take action - please seek professional help.

[Connor_cbt]

Don't take this at all in a patronising way but this could also be part of the changes your body goes through as you are becoming an adult. Most men will relate to strong feelings that come from nowhere when they were around your age. The world is a very different place now even compared to when I grew up, young people are much more exposed to sex in the news, tv shows and film and of course the Internet. The other thing to remember is that thoughts are not crimes, the mind sometimes can be our worst enemy!

There is the classic scenario of a very serious church assembly where a person gets the sudden urge to burst out laughing and the stronger they fight the urge the stronger it becomes until they can barely stifle it! I myself had an awkward moment at my grandfathers funeral, it was a very somber, sad time. I loved may gramps dearly but as the vicar was reading a very touching poem a young infant in the assembly let out a funny squeaky noise it cut through the sad atmosphere in a flash and I tried desperately to stifle a laugh until someone else cracked and a few of us laughed with relief.

My point being that sometimes when you think of something inappropriate the more you try to stifle and suppress it the stronger the thought becomes. There have been a number of high profile cases of child abuse and paedophilia in the news and incestuous thoughts have been a social taboo just about forever! Could it be that your strong libido/sex drive is causing you to have sexual fantasies and some of those fantasies have been inappropriate. Then the fact that you've had these thoughts bother you and in spite of trying to stifle them or ignore them they return.

If this sounds familiar, the next time you have these thoughts I want you to try something. When you have the thought, instead of tensing up and trying to suppress them (along with all the negative thoughts like I'm a terrible person for thinking that, I must be weird, e.t.c.)and just think to yourself "this is normal and will pass and I am still the good kind person I've always been." Then let the thoughts pass and see how you feel. Try to notice the difference between trying to suppress the thought and the tightening around it to the relaxation of allowing it to pass just like the millions of other thoughts myth have through the day.

If this doesn't work for you try talking to someone, you can google to find free youth counselling or mental health services in your area. Also take a look on the forum, there are tons of people that have similar intrusive thoughts and maybe it will give you some comfort to know that it is a fairly common problem.

All the best,

[chalky500]

Thank you Connor for taking the time to write all that. After consulting my therapist ( who I see infrequently hence the forum) I feel this is just an age thing where I've started noticing things a little more like you say. What bothered me was that I kept staring at them to prove I felt nothing. Of course, it didn't work. Again thanks for your help that was great. Aspergers and OCD is not a great combo as you can imagine. :)