Thought it had gone away...

[janine85]

Been almost a year since I even logged into this site, slowly feel anxiety creeping up on me. Have been of medication since September, life has changed so much since then.

I became single after 10 years. Amicable, we just seemed to have grown apart. He is my best friend and I miss him dearly. I moved out of our home and into the city. I love him and always will. He seems so happy and I'm not. Why?

I had a blow out after the split and drank and partied alot but at 28 years old I've slowed down and since then I've started feeling sad and unhappy and lonely. I don't have many friends, especially true friends. I guess I just mainly feel like I have nobody to talk to.

My job is ok but it's repetitive and easy so it gives me a lot of time to think. My anxiety stemmed from family dysfunction as a child and abruptly came to head when I lost a friend in 2009 and another childhood friend just 9 months later. I deal with the deaths in my own way and cope.

I have recently started dating a guy who is lovely and adores me - he really loves me but I'm insure how I feel. It's nice to have company and a cuddle.

I haven't suffered a real anxiety or panic attack in a while. I'm not expecting sympathy or even replies it just feels good to have told someone. Thank you.

[aggiecuttler]

hi sorry you are having a rough time of it at the moment, it sounds like you wish the relationship which ended should not have! do you think you have made a mistake, glad you have someone new, but beware you are not just with someone just so you are not on your own, try and stay on top of the anxiety before its gets on top of you even if it means more meds dont take a spiral downward i am always here to talk blessings

[b1001]

Hi, sounds like you've been through a lot. I have been through something similar whereby I wanted out of a relationship of 5 years but once she actually left I missed her and starting seeing how good I had it. Also I work from home a lot and work is quiet so I get isolated, some days the phone doesn't ring I just get a couple of emails.

I think the key is to work on friendships rather than relationships, it can be more difficult to make a friend than to find a partner and you have to nurture the relationship. Have you tried joining a club or gym, anything you can do to meet people will help.

I replaced my ex with a girlfriend who I though was "ok", I ended up pushing her away too, mainly because I just wanted her to fill a social void in my life rather than be my true partner. I have come to realise that if you aren't crazy about someone then they probably aren't the right person for you.

Best wishes though.