What is the worst that can happen? [Archive]

D ROC

05-01-07, 06:36

Hey bev,

I am brand new here and this is my first post but I can completely understand the feelng of having such terrible anxiety stay with you for the rest of your life. What has worked for myself a book called The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari by Robin Sharma. The book talks about life can be completely how you imagine it. Much like a dream, every time we are awake, we can control every feeling and every emotion in our body. Robin talks about how sometimes we just choose to look at situations in the wrong way. I'll admit that I am so bad at doing that especially concerning my health. But really I just realize that there are two ways to look at anxiety. We can perceive the world around us as a grey place where health problems are every where and sadness is debilitating or we can see the world for what it is. I know this post may sound totally out there but Robin Sharma's book really did help. Whenever I start to think that maybe my headache is something worse, I go for a walk and enjoy all the smells and sounds. Walking and exercise will take anyone out of a state of panic and for even an hour, help them relax and control the way everything is perceived. It may sound totally out there but I highly suggest reading the book. Anyway I will stop rambling on but this site seems to be the perfect place to control thoughts of anxiety, so glad I found it!

Big Thanks,

D ROC

angiebaby

26-05-07, 17:43

Perhaps if i could not be afraid of dying then the symptoms could not bother me!

june

27-05-07, 14:56

What a good topic.
Any time I have given this answer, the therapist or whoever usually says "oh, you can't look at life like that" What??? you asked and that is my answer When panic strikes you are finished.
I would like to give a quote from Shirley Tricket - Coping successfully with Panic Attacks. -
quote -"I have seen both psychiatrist and psychologist and neither taught me what i wanted to know = what was actually going on in my body to give me such bizarre feelings. - I did not need to be told i had anxiety symptoms; I was living with them. I wanted to know WHY my hands and feet buzzed and why i fell so spaced out" end quote.
personally i think if the medics had time to say you feel giddy because... you feel you are going to be sick because....
We might get a handle on our feelings.
good luck
luv June

purplehaze

28-05-07, 00:54

its no surprize that the winner (if you call it winning) is fear of death...So far no one has died of a panic attack and we all go throught the same worries and fears over and over and over again....Sometimes death would be better than living in fear..not that I am advocating we all kill ourselves but we need to take control of the panics or whatever else ails us....I just take one moment at a time and some times I fail but I have got to the point where I want my bloody life back again....Great info on this site..so why are we all not reading it and re-reading it until we believe it...Panic attacks are re-inforced by our belief that something bad is going to happen and we keep re-inforcing it each time we fear it...so by the same token , if we keep re-reading and writing down the info on this site we begin to attack the attacks...if that makes sense

love and hugs to you all

june

28-05-07, 12:59

Purplehaze - what a good reply.
I have been worrying all morning because of 'pins and needles' in my left arm, from my shouder to my little finger.
Now, one half of my brain is logical and tells me that either I lay awkward last night or it is hyperventilation.
BUT the other half of my brain is screaming "what if ....?" " It might be...."
I have a written diary of how I have felt almost every day for many years - panic / axiety / and as you say - i can read a page from 5 years ago that i might have written yesterday.
The symptoms have been identical and yet i still can not trust my own mind and get on with a stress free life - I literally keep mentaly beating myself with the same stick over and over and i get so angry and then i start all over again.
yes everything you said makes sense - I just wish I could believe in myself.
luv june

Cindy

30-05-07, 10:46

Hi
I don't know I am just very scared of getting sick and dying.But yet I am tired of having this and feeling this and I am so scared that one day I am going to look back and think why did I let fear rule my life and why could'nt I have been braver.

SHERLOCK

30-05-07, 13:43

I'm Not Scared Of Dying, Death Is Simple, It's Life That Is Complicated.

miss motown

30-05-07, 15:04

i fear of loosing control and going insane the depersonalization dosent help that has got to be the most severe for me i guess:wacko:

kittykat

04-06-07, 11:31

I get scared in case my fears come true . Like getting cancer ( main fear and cause of anxiety ) and dying.........even though i believe in god etc im still really scared .

Shadowwin

11-06-07, 03:02

I always think I'm going to die before I get anywhere in my life.. that I'll leave behind the person I'll love and I won't be able to grow old with him.

boy

11-06-07, 12:25

We can perceive the world around us as a grey place where health problems are every where and sadness is debilitating or we can see the world for what it is.

That's pretty much the difference between my childhood and now! Interesting poll - I picked the family one.

luc

23-10-07, 08:19

i dont think it out. I ruminate over small details. For example i have been up since 4 this morning gouing over doctors conversations, practice nurse's eye contact, tone before and after consultation etc etc ....

june

27-10-07, 13:24

luc this appears to be the problem with most of us we "ruminate" over every little detail - replay everything - we might have missed first time round.
Usually if we get a "big" problem - if you like "a real problem" we deal with it... Our fear (i think ) is fear of the Unknown -
What makes us feel giddy?
What makes us so scared?
What makes our tummy churn?
Why is my vision blurred?
The answer usually given is "It is caused by stress!!!!!!!!!!
YES BUT WHAT IS STRESS
Best wishes to you
June

Toffeeapple

10-11-07, 22:30

This thread is brilliant! I feel so happy and comforted that I am not alone (although it's not nice that so many people are like me).
My worse fear is not actually dying like the majority. It's to become disabled or incapacitated and living but not being able to do normal things like looking after my kids... for a while my worst fear was having a stroke, not dying from it but surviving it.
Until one day I dreamt that I was actually having a stroke (my worst nightmare is the feeling of numbness in my body or face, which I've never yet experienced but it really REALLY freaks me out) and it didn't feel that terrible once it happened (in my dream).
I'm no longer scared of strokes but still freak out about being paralised or having some sort of nerve damage that would affect my face or my muscles.
Very strange. I wish I could find out why.

Toffeeapple

10-11-07, 22:44

i fear of loosing control and going insane the depersonalization dosent help that has got to be the most severe for me i guess:wacko:
The depersonalization is the thing that freaked me out the most I think around 2 years ago when I had it for the first time (due to severe anxiety).
I couldn't put my finger on it, and just described it to the doctors as "a numb feeling in my arms". But looking back it was my whole body and soul that felt numb from anxiety.
I see that "derealization" as a really positive thing now. If I get it (which is extremely rare these days) I see it as a warning. I just really, truely accept it and almost laugh at it, thinking : "here we go I've been too anxious recently, I need to take some time out", because I know what it is, I am completely comfortable with it.
I have to say though the first time it happened I couldn't help thinking "Oh my god, what if I feel like this forever...." And that really scared me.
P.S: The revelation was when I read the possible side effects of coming of Temazepan (which I never took as too freaked out by the side effects :ohmy: ) and it said: "You might feel a detachment from yourself".

ladybird

20-11-07, 16:16

I'm not afraid of being dead. It will be the same as before I was born. I'm afraid of getting cancer or some other terminal illness and then the process of dying.

Greeneyed

20-11-07, 16:31

Mine is not included. My worse fears are often around people finding out all the terrible things I have done in my life - i.e. If I have AIDS people will fnd out about all the one night stands I had a college, If I have Liver failure it will be from previous alcohol abuse, if I go mad it will be from recreational drugs, I am a bad person and everyone will know about it! And I will be responsible for my own downfall.

I also have health anxiety about things which aren't because of these factors but for me often the very worse anxieties centre around shame and being a bad person.

Sounds crazy doesn't it, you'd think death would be scarier than shame!

trish1955

22-11-07, 10:23

fairyloveheart

20-03-08, 16:36

:(:huh:

Blackstar

23-10-08, 14:37

Hi everyone,

I think this thread is really interesting, I've liked reading through everyone's thoughts and experiences.

Personally the worst that can happen for me is finding out I have a horrible illness (usually cancer or something incurable, debilitating and progressive), because I think I'd crumble and not be able to cope. I also don't think I could enjoy life ever again if I found out I had an illness to battle. How could I? How could I enjoy life if I knew in an instant it was going to be over soon and probably in a painful way? How could I relate to other people who were all okay, how could I not resent them for their good health?

These are my fears. Not so much about dying - although I don't want to, just yet! - because I'd be dead and wouldn't know; it's more about how the heck I would cope with things if something was wrong with me.

Wow that was quite intense writing that. Just realised a lot about myself there...I think I'm quite a weak person :weep:

I hope one day I can think to myself, 'don't worry about what's round the corner and just enjoy this moment'...

A. x

TraceyB

24-10-08, 11:32

for me its thinking im going to die and leaving my 4 kids all alone

kendo59

24-10-08, 21:41

Not so much health-anxiety related.

In my case, what I worry about the worst that could happen...
I lose everything from being out of work, savings, house, end up with nothing, let everyone down who rely on me.

To me, that would be worse than death.

thepoet78

24-10-08, 22:37

My biggest fear is that the panic attacks,disrealization,depression will never end and i'll be like this forever. Never again wanting to join in on the things that are going on around me.The things i once loved doing.Looking at every single symptom i have as a major health issue.

BNCfan

27-10-08, 08:30

[quote - Perhaps if i could not be afraid of dying then the symptoms could not bother me!]

DYING. That's my problem too angiebaby, the root of all my general and health anxiety is a fear of death and you can't avoid that one, because every second we're getting nearer and nearer to it. Because of this fear I've wasted 55 years of my life and I've never met anyone who has any idea how to cope with this fear because it means they have to face their own mortality. Sadly I was forced to face mine when I was too young (9) to deal with it when my dad died very suddenly. I challenge the constant thoughts, but they never go away.

Natural Mystic

04-11-08, 17:49

hi my worst fear is that the anxiety and depersonalisation will stay forever and never go away.

b.barnes
Me too but my very worst is this leading to a breakdown and then worrying about what'll happen to my son.

Ive never heard of anxiety/panic disorders leading to breakdowns but it's still a fear of mine, especially when I'm having one of the dark episodes.

Natural Mystic

04-11-08, 17:53

i fear of loosing control and going insane the depersonalization dosent help that has got to be the most severe for me i guess:wacko:
DITTO

anx mum

05-11-08, 09:35

Hi june hope u dont mind me writing to u im Bev suffering with severe anxiety. I notice u said u get pins and needles do u get these often?

pinkpiglet

05-11-08, 10:06

Maybe if I didnt fear illness & death so much then I wouldnt have anxiety. I don't only fear for myself but for my friends and family too, so there is no relief!
After i had my son (two years ago on the 8th) I was so happy, i didnt think about death & dying anymore, life was too good to worry about 'what if's!'. Then in February this year my beloved Nan passed away, I sat and held her hand as she slipped away. It was very peacfull and humbling as she was going to suffer no more but it was very sad for those left behind. I now worry about dying & leaving my son, not about death itself.

sunshine-lady

10-01-09, 15:53

Lol I vote about dying as I don't think you can get any worse than that xxc

Quintessence

10-01-09, 16:09

Death, I think I can honestly say, doesn't bother me. I was not-alive before 1966, as far as I know, and it didn't bother me.

What does bother me:

1) Incapacity - dependence on others, being in hospital, losing faculties. Being trapped. That's why I've actually voted "I'm afraid of being disabled". I don't mean afraid of being in a wheelchair - plenty of disabled people have very full lives, a lot fuller than mine! I'm afraid of being on a drip, on a respirator, on a cupboardful of drugs, dis-abled, on borrowed time...

2) Causing grief in others (my parents... I'm an only child).

3) Knowing that 'that's it'... no chance of fulfilling dreams... Perhaps my health anxiety is at root a sense of failure because I feel as though I haven't lived... (as in 'If you haven't seen such-and-such, you haven't lived'...) It tends (or tended) to fade away in times when I had more purpose, when I felt as though I was doing something with my life.

chandlerhair

10-01-09, 21:59

I think that I am afraid of dying because that's it, it's final. You aren't coming back. When I was a little girl, well maybe not real young but around 11 or 12...I would visualize that this world we live in and everything around us can be gone in a second and that's it....there is no more. That is a very scary feeling for me.

kathy.x

13-05-09, 23:41

i'm scared of dying painfully, not actual death. i know that after that i'm scared the anxiety will never go away after that - so at the moment i just have to accept death and then symptoms should go away :)

Greg1983

14-05-09, 10:08

I'm scared of dying - each time i get a little twinge/bump/lump i have to think the worse and not what it could be

Kerrigan

21-06-09, 22:47

My worst fear is that I will TOTALLY humiliate myself in public but the stupid fact is-I have already done that enough times!!!

Alot of my life is an embarassment frankly; my part time job, my homelife as I still live with the rents, my endless single status, my few friends who I met at Mind, my lame crushes, my lack of realistic life plan or resigned to a substandard way of being, my avoidance, refusal and denial of a life worth living.

I've choked in a myriad of situations and everyone knows there's something up with me. This poll is an eyeopener because it shows in alot-if not all-cases we fear only fear itself.

magpie girl

22-06-09, 21:00

dying is my biggest fear:shrug: yes i now it will happen to us all one day ,but i want to die when im 90 in my sleep ,no illness no heart attack.

Kerrigan

22-06-09, 21:34

The worst thing happened to me today, I choked in the middle of town:ohmy: . It was so weird because I went to Mind (a mental health social group) and the whole time I was there I felt this surreal premonition, it was all like deja vu. The radio was on, now and then I'd walk around and come back into the lounge and sit down beside someone and the song would be just what I knew it would be, as if I'd lived this day before, there was no mistaking it-even this morning when I got out of bed I heard songs in my head that I heard this evening at Mind.

There's a police officer that likes me who works in town, I've never mentioned this before because I feel like the force are omnipresent and I didn't want to be pressumptious but I'm pretty sure he does, so I was at the top of town and I'd walked all the way from Mind into the city and down past the mall and I was trying to text someone when it happened, I just choked, I didn't want to believe it, I thought I was going to faint I was looking down at my sandals and the ground seemed to spin for a second, there was this simple thought in my head that said 'yes, that did just happen' and I grabbed a water bottle out of my bag while looking sheepishly around.:unsure:

There was a pretty girl, leaning casually against the wall behind me I turned to see her watching me while her boyfriend used the cash machine, I think he also glanced across at me but when my eyes met hers she tossed her glossy brown curls aside and carried on chatting with him. I carried on walking feeling numb and cursing myself.

I went and got lunch even though I was beginning to feel sick and made my way to the bus stop where 3 cops were stood nearby, one of them was the one who likes me and they were sort of watching me but I only actually saw them after I got on the bus because I just couldn't think straight, I kept looking around thinking everyone was talking about me.

I wish I could rewind time, I was wearing my hair up in a high ponytail with an attempted quiff style and a white blazer, I'd spent ages on my make-up and it was a mellow evening. I only hope they didn't hear me!:blush:

dave316

01-07-09, 19:04

I know that one day i will die but i think i am scared of dying more because of all the things i would leave undone and all the things unsaid. I think a part of it also is the experience itself and that is probably why one of my biggest fears is passing out. We are told it cannot happen but i am under the impression that the feeling of passing out would be the same as dying as it regards the loss of consciousness.... the only difference is you obviously wouldnt awake if your life had come to an end. I think its my not wanting to die early or go through the experience that make me fear the idea of fainting and its symptoms. I hope you get where i am coming from.

Oh and by the way isnt this heat uncomfy? I am one of those who thinks as a country (UK) we moan when its too cold and too hot haha but seriously this heat is not overly pleasant. The sun can stay but the mugginess can take its leave :o)

Dave
UK

Panic33

18-08-09, 00:28

I fear there is something wrong with me (usualy my head/brain) and I'm dying.

sarah jayne

13-09-09, 13:37

Im terrified of dying, i know it happens to everyone one day but im really scared !

Amanda_27

14-09-09, 23:10

My latest fear at the moment is definetely dying. I seem to be consumed with thoughts that every little niggle or ache and pain I have is cancer or a brain tumour or something equally awful. I completely freaked out two nights ago when I woke up with a really numb arm and thought I had had a stroke. I don't even stop and think rationally that even if I did have cancer for instance that I may be cured, it is just complete worst case scenario. I have worried quite a lot regarding my health over the past few years but never as intensely or as often as I have recently. I think with death you just know it's so final, I think that's the terrifying thing