Mrs haha
09-08-13, 10:12
Hi
I have suffered from OCD intrusive thoughts twice before in my life, and currently having an episode. The last episode was 15 years ago, and first of all I want to reassure people that are posting on this forum and new to the condition that they can recover! I know its terrifying and distressing, but I found a way to cope, and have lived a totally good high functioning life for years.
Unfortunately, after 15 years, last week an event has sparked off an episode with me (hence being on this site). I read the news about the poor polish boy that was badly abused in the UK and since then I can't get the images of him out my mind and can't stop crying at what he went through. My brain goes over and over what it must have been like for him and I am exhausted. I have a 17 months old baby and I know that is why it has affected me so badly. I can't believe a mother would do that to her child and I feel such grief, trauma and sorrow at his tragic life. These traumatic thoughts have sparked off an OCD type episode. I don't want to think about his pain and therefore the more I try and blank my thoughts the more they appear accompanied by the anxiety, panic and depression
I was once told that people who suffer from panic attacks and OCD thoughts have high levels of empathy and create strong emotional bonds with thoughts, sights and smells. That's why these can become triggers
However, what I wish to stress is that once you find a coping mechanism (what ever that may be) you will have the skills to cope if they ever come back. I understand the signs of what is happening, and have already taken steps to stop myself spiralling. I am not frightened (well a wee bit!!) and definitely know I am not going insane
For me personally, I am a firm believer that these episodes are chemical related associated with stress. I have not had one full nights sleep in 17 months (my wee one is a bad sleeper) and have a very stressful full time job and lots of traumatic events in my own life. It would not surprise me if my serotonin levels have taken a blip.
However, because I can see what is happening with my thoughts, I am not going to allow the circle of depression and anxiety to start, and going straight to the doctors if I am still feeling this way in a few weeks. Previously anti depressants were a great help
The reason I am sharing this, is that if you can start to understand what is causing the thoughts (is it chemical/linked to anxiety/trauma) or if that is to difficult at the moment, concentrate on understanding the OCD condition and how it effects the thought process in your brain, that may also really help. I am also a firm believer in cognitive therapy that helps you change your negative thought process
It's incredibly hard though and will take time, and I am so glad I have found this website to see that people now have support and an open forum to discuss. I didn't have this 15 years ago and I was very alone.
You are definitely not alone and please believe me it is a very very common problem.
Thinking of you all:bighug1:
xx
I have suffered from OCD intrusive thoughts twice before in my life, and currently having an episode. The last episode was 15 years ago, and first of all I want to reassure people that are posting on this forum and new to the condition that they can recover! I know its terrifying and distressing, but I found a way to cope, and have lived a totally good high functioning life for years.
Unfortunately, after 15 years, last week an event has sparked off an episode with me (hence being on this site). I read the news about the poor polish boy that was badly abused in the UK and since then I can't get the images of him out my mind and can't stop crying at what he went through. My brain goes over and over what it must have been like for him and I am exhausted. I have a 17 months old baby and I know that is why it has affected me so badly. I can't believe a mother would do that to her child and I feel such grief, trauma and sorrow at his tragic life. These traumatic thoughts have sparked off an OCD type episode. I don't want to think about his pain and therefore the more I try and blank my thoughts the more they appear accompanied by the anxiety, panic and depression
I was once told that people who suffer from panic attacks and OCD thoughts have high levels of empathy and create strong emotional bonds with thoughts, sights and smells. That's why these can become triggers
However, what I wish to stress is that once you find a coping mechanism (what ever that may be) you will have the skills to cope if they ever come back. I understand the signs of what is happening, and have already taken steps to stop myself spiralling. I am not frightened (well a wee bit!!) and definitely know I am not going insane
For me personally, I am a firm believer that these episodes are chemical related associated with stress. I have not had one full nights sleep in 17 months (my wee one is a bad sleeper) and have a very stressful full time job and lots of traumatic events in my own life. It would not surprise me if my serotonin levels have taken a blip.
However, because I can see what is happening with my thoughts, I am not going to allow the circle of depression and anxiety to start, and going straight to the doctors if I am still feeling this way in a few weeks. Previously anti depressants were a great help
The reason I am sharing this, is that if you can start to understand what is causing the thoughts (is it chemical/linked to anxiety/trauma) or if that is to difficult at the moment, concentrate on understanding the OCD condition and how it effects the thought process in your brain, that may also really help. I am also a firm believer in cognitive therapy that helps you change your negative thought process
It's incredibly hard though and will take time, and I am so glad I have found this website to see that people now have support and an open forum to discuss. I didn't have this 15 years ago and I was very alone.
You are definitely not alone and please believe me it is a very very common problem.
Thinking of you all:bighug1:
xx