Anxiety when away from home? :(

[Cherryblossom]

Hi everyone,

For about a year now, I've had anxiety when away from home. I went on holiday last year and my anxiety ruined it because I constantly felt sick and unwell. In the last 6 months it's gotten progressively worse and in the last couple of months, it's gotten really bad to the point where I'm at my wits end.

It's hard to explain really because it's not a social anxiety. I don't get
nervous around people, I don't have an anxiety where I don't like interacting even with strangers. I will gladly socialise with people. The problem is, mainly eating. I get quite anxious if I am away from home in an enclosed space so for example, on a bus/car/plane, in a cinema etc. And when it comes to eating out, I feel physically sick. I pick at food for fear of vomiting if I eat too much and every mouthful makes me feel worse and worse. I don't enjoy meals out like I used to. I dread them. My stomach churns, sometimes I get a really bad stomach and have to go to the toilet a number of times. And that's before I've even eaten anything. I used to be a really sociable person but now I make excuses not to go out and when I do got out, I have a miserable time.

I have a huge phobia of sick and being sick. I've always had it but it's gotten worse over the years. I think this is contributing to my anxiety. I get anxious that I will feel sick when I'm away from the comfort of my home (where, if I was sick, I would be alone and in familiar surroundings) and in turn, the anxiety itself makes me feel sick. It's like a never-ending cycle. I panic that other people will be sick around me too. If I'm with a friend and they say they don't feel well, I panic and start feeling sick too. I took my daughter to the cinema a couple of weeks ago and a child behind me started coughing a lot and I suddenly thought maybe she was going to be sick. I started panicking, my heart was pounding, I was sweating and going hot and cold and thought I was going to throw up so I had to leave and go to the toilets to calm myself down before going back and changing seats.

I know it's all in my head. If I was genuinely physically sick then it would be a constant thing, not something that only happened in certain environments. I haven't yet seen a doctor because I don't even know if I'll be taken seriously. I am going to Spain for 4 days with a friend next week and I am starting a new job soon after that. Two things that will send my anxiety out of control. I just want to be normal, to be able to have lunch with a friend, go for a couple of drinks, go out for the day without feeling sluggish and nauseous the whole time. Does anyone have any advice at all? Or had a similar problem? If so, what did you do?

Thanks in advance,

CB

[Cherryblossom]

Nobody got any advice at all? :(

[Buj]

If it helps, once you get somewhere and you feel encouraged by the success of doing this, you can actually start to feel human again and enjoy a little of the break. Sometimes we need get away from where we feel safe x

[star68]

I get anxiety too when I am away from home. My main fear is having a heart attack or stroke. If my heart goes a little faster or I get a bit dizzy my body turns to alert mode and I will be monitoring every symptom making me more nervous and creating more symptoms, I will get then stomach problems, nausea and insomnia. I try different techniques that normally work but didn´t work on my last holiday I was very disappointed but there were a lot of anxiety triggers at the time so nothing would have worked. My advice to you will be to go to a counsellor or therapist first to deal with your phobia about being sick. They will show you techniques even in the internet you can get a lot of info. And then expose yourself using the techniques. The tiredness that you feel is due o the emotional stress you go through with all the worry and anticipation and it becomes a vicious circle, that you will break when you overcome your phobia.
Best wishes

[saab]

Everyone gets nervous when they are outside their comfort zone - being away from home is well outside most peoples comfort zone, mine included. Then if you feel ill and anxious whilst you are away that just reinforces the anxiety associated with being away. It's a vicious circle where you only feel ok near home and that comfort zone gets smaller and smaller. I guess this is how agoraphobia starts.

Claire Weekes has written some great books on anxiety. Her method is to relax and "float" through anxious situations. Panic will subside on its own eventually if you dont try to fight it.