starting new relationship

[tricia56]

hi not sure if this ok to post on here but I have been a close friend to a man now for 8yrs we used to meet regular when we first met go for meals etc but when I got bad with my anxiety I stoped meeting up with him but in april I found the courage to invite him round to my home even tho I was so anxiouse and scared but the evening went relly well and now we have got a lot closer and he wants to take to another level and wants to stay over but ive got myself so worked up over it as I haven't been in a intermit relationship for a very long time and im quite scared about being intermit with him in case I have a panic attack or something and I frieghten him away , he knows I have anxiety but I don't know why im feeling the way I do because of it and being so scared , im not sure if its because I have the anxiety that its that that is making me feel and think this way and is it normal to think this way would like any advice please thks

[Edie]

Tricia, the beginning of a relationship would make anyone feel insecure! The anxiety is going to make you even more nervous, and it's quite a personal thing to explain at the start of a relationship that you have panic attacks. Maybe it would be best to be frank with him about the panic attacks, tell him what happens, what he can do to help (if anything), and that they're not his fault. If he knows beforehand he would know what to expect and less likely to be scared off by them, which may in turn reassure you and mean it's less likely to happen.

You obviously like the guy, so it's better to be hobest than push him away. As for the intimacy, you'll find you remember what to do :)

Good luck xxx

[tricia56]

hi edie thk you for replying ive never had panic attacks before in that situation and think wat I ment was because I have read about people having them when being intermit and dieing of a heart attack I think the wat if that happenes to me , oh well lol suppose I could look at it in a light hearted and say ....... oh well if I did I die happy :roflmao:

[Edie]

If it's never happened before, it's very unlikely now! Seriously, you're going to be fine :)

[Kim51]

Go for it Tricia he seems a very nice man and I am sure he will understand life is to short for ifs and buts (wish I could practice what I preach!!) you have nothing to loose and think how wonderful it would be to be in a warm loving relationship, it could well relax you and help with your anxiety and panic. Good luck :bighug1:

[Speranza]

Go you! Talk to him, he's a good friend. And then stop talking... :shades: