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View Full Version : Ive changed the title...DEFINATELY a sucess now!!!



sarah
01-07-04, 13:19
Hiya Guys

As some of you know I havent worked since I got made redundant 18 months ago. Ive been too panicky and gone up and down from agoraphobia to not so bad and everything in between.

Anyway, last night I got a phone call from a girl I used to work with who now works in an oncology pharmacy unit in Wimbledon. She's having staffing problems and her boss asked her if she thought she should get a temp in.
She immediately thought of me and called and asked if I was feeling better and would I be interested in doing some work if her boss ok'd it.
Well I said ok, let me know what boss says.

This morning I got a call from her - boss said great, bring her in!!!!!!

So Ive got to go in on Monday afternoon to take in my Qualification Certificates and sign some things and then I will be doing about 3 weeks work from mid July in a job I know inside and out for a minimum 12 an hour - how can I refuse???

Since the phone call ive been panicking like a nutter, pacing the house chanting swear words and over-analysing what might happen [Duh!]

Ive just been for a drive over there to check out where it is and braved the Wimbledon traffic (totally jammed because of the traffic) and been to Next and bought a new top suitable for work!!!!!! WOW did I just say WORK?????

Please can you all send me good vibes as im bricking it!!!!....lol

take care
love Sarah
xx

we arent mad, just the next stage of evolution :)

andrew
01-07-04, 13:55
hi sarah, wow!!! im sure you'll be fine and really well done
take care andrew

twister
01-07-04, 15:11
WOW Sarah - you really are on the road to recovery. This is an excellent opportunity to ease beack into things with no pressure - this is a godsend.

Good luck, and dont even think about it until the night before and then JFDI!

:D:D:D:D:D

Emily

Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit
Understanding is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad

apm
01-07-04, 16:33
Sarah, that's great news!! Just think about what you'll do with all that lovely moolah!
Proud of you!

Alex.
xx

Outside a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside a dog, it's too dark to read.
-Groucho Marx.

sarah
01-07-04, 16:45
hey, thanks guys

ive been keeping myself busy this afternoon or I would drive myself crazy.
Ive been furiously hunting for my certificates...I was in my last job for 12 years so ive never needed them before...lol but ive found them burried at the bottom of my wardrobe with my old GCSE, A Level certs and my old school books (no I didnt burn them on the last day of school..lol)..ive had a good trip down memory lane today [^]

thanks for your support guys...god knows im going to need it when its time to actually go to WORK and do it...lol

love Sarah
xx


we arent mad, just the next stage of evolution :)

Meg
01-07-04, 17:04
Sarah,

You have been doing soooooo well recently through all your own determination and pure hard work.

You've purposely put yourself into and through situations that a few short months ago you would have not even considered possible so a huge round of applause and congratulations.

This now is moving to the next level which you are ready for -

At this time you are just going to meet them so you get a chance to suss it out and decide it will suit you ..

Focus on your initial meeting only and not the whole scenario for the moment. You have choices every step of the way .

Get a mantra going

Good luck






Meg

'There can only be true courage when first there is genuine fear'

Dr.David Livingstone

seh1980
01-07-04, 17:43
Hi Sarah,

WOW!!! That is such good news!! I'm sure you will be fine at work and it will give you such a good opportunity to get out there again and do what you want to do!! Let us know how it goes.

Sarah (seh1980)

imported_n/a
01-07-04, 18:37
HI SARAH,,,

i love reading your posts you do make me smile,,

GO FOR IT MATE,,,

i am so sure you will be as cool as,,

NICE 1 MATE,,,,[Yeah!][Yeah!][Yeah!]

all my best wishes for you,,ok

P,S could you bring me some drugs back,,,LOL,,

""HAPPINESS IS ALWAYS THERE UNDERNEATH THE ANGER AND DESPAIR""



xxxxdarrenxxxx

nomorepanic
01-07-04, 20:26
Sarah

Sorry mate but it just isn't good enough :(

I can't have my moderator getting cured and going to work - what will people think! [?]

He He :)[:P] Only kidding!

Well done mate!! I am sure you will be fine and it may lead on to bigger things you never know!!

It is only 3 weeks so even if you hate it you can use it as an intro back to work to see how it goes and I am sure you will be fine and love it.

Best of all you get some money!!!

Good luck ok - you deserve to do this and jump that big step forward now. [^]

xx

Nicola

kate
01-07-04, 20:52
Good for you, Sarah for taking the next step forward [^]

Yes it is scary and yes you will be anxious. But you will do it and come out the other side.

Well done and we will all be thinking about you [8D]

Kate x

sarah
01-07-04, 21:22
Hiya Guys

Thanks for your words of wisdom as always. Much appreciated!!!

Darren - Sorry mate, not those kinds of drugs...lol [:O]

Nic - Dont worry, I will still find time in my busy new executive life to answer a few posts...lol [:P]

All - great advice. I can feel the good vibes pouring from my screen now...lol ;)

Well my mate that has got me the job came to visit me on her way home as she guesed that I would be feeling bad (bless her and I havent seen her for nearly a year!!!). She reassured me totally and I told her to explain to her boss about my panic etc as I dont want to hide it and have her wondering why im so vacant..lol
Anyways, her boss said 'ohh bless her, get her in and lets see if we can help her back into things, she sounds perfect for the job!!!!' - how cool is that? Are they all panic nutters there? Maybe I will try and blag a full time job if it goes ok...lol

So when I go in on monday to take in my certificates etc my mate said she will show me round so its not such a big shock on my 1st day.

Blimey, I almost sound excited :D

love sarah
xx

we arent mad, just the next stage of evolution :)

kate
01-07-04, 21:42
Sounds like a lovely place to work Sarah, and that they will make you feel really welcome!

Good luck!

Kate x

jonny
01-07-04, 21:43
U go girl!

Jonny.

stimpy
02-07-04, 02:08
Well done Mate !

You go for it.
Don't forget to spend your 12 an hour on something special.

I think you deserve it.

Love, light and Best wishes
Liz xxx
With hard work and determination and all the things you know.
The world is there for you to take. There's nowhere you can't go.


[:p]Scatty Eccentric & 'Poet Laureate to panic and anxiety'

pips
02-07-04, 19:11
Well done Sarah,

I am so pleased for you! Well done you! Wishing you all the very best for Monday! You go girl!

Take care

Love Pip's XX

sarah
05-07-04, 16:00
Hiya boys and girls :D

Well its now nearly 4pm on monday afternoon so I guess that means that I had to go in to fill in forms etc at WORK today!!

GUESS WHAT??????

I DID IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

For the first 10 minutes I sucessfully fended off 2 panic attacks (you know the ones where your heart pounds, you feel faint and you think you might be sick??...yeah those ones....lol)

After that I was completely fine. I met everyone, took a tour and even got some quick training on how they do things there. I didnt need my water and the quick squirt of rescue remedy in the car must have done the trick!!!

I was there for just over 2 hours (and I thought it would be a quick in and out...lol). Ive had a good old chat with the 2 people who work there that I used to work with and almost didnt want to leave.

ive negociated way over the 12 quid so things are looking good!!!!!

I felt so good on the way home that I put the roof down on my car and sang my little heart out all the way home.

I cant wait to start on the 26th July although im sure I will be in a state again by the time it comes round..lol

take care all and THANKYOU for all your support and listening to my ramblings!!!

love Sarah
xx

we arent mad, just the next stage of evolution :)

Meg
05-07-04, 16:10
Well done Sarah...

You could volunteer to pop by in a week or so to get a bit of no pressure 'shadowing' and to get more familiar with the place and people, thus making it even easier on the 26th .

Superb effort . You really have come so far these last few weeks . Many congratulations indeed .



Meg

Anxiety is a thin stream of fear trickling through the mind.
If encouraged, it cuts a channel into which all other thoughts are drained.
Robert Albert Bloch

nomorepanic
05-07-04, 16:57
Heya Mate!!

Well done to you [:P]

Glad it wasn't as bad as you thought and glad you felt that it will all be ok and you will fit in well.

Good news about the pay increase too!!

Bet you feel great now don't you?

Is there any chance of getting a permanent job there atall?

:Dxxx

Nicola

kate
05-07-04, 16:57
Hi Sarah,

So pleased to hear that you got on so well!![Wow!]

Also good that you negotiated a higher rate of pay! [8D]

Nice one!!

Kate x

sarah
08-07-04, 11:10
hiya guys, me again with a little update

My friend has just called me up to ask if I can come in to work for 3 days next week to validate myself to use their isolators. So........I start on Monday afternoon AAARRRGGHHHHH...lol

Also her boss has said that she might be able to get me some temporary work in the Royal Marsden Hospital which would be fab as another ex colleague now works there. (yep when we all got made redundant they all went far and wide in their new jobs).

There must be some sort of conspiracy going on as another friend I used to work with has called me up the other day to ask me if I can do some work in august in the Royal Surrey hosp in Guildford. Amazingly I had to say I could only probably do the last 2 weeks in august as I already had a job....lol. I did the trip there the other evening and it was a 45 mile round trip (not sure im ready for that one yet then...lol)

maybe im biting off more that I can chew but if I keep telling myself its all temporary then I wont feel so bad eh?

take care
love sarah
xx

we arent mad, just the next stage of evolution :)

Meg
08-07-04, 16:12
The universe has decided it would show you how ready you are to spread your wings once again ..

Excellent news all round

grace
08-07-04, 19:14
hi sarah,
you sound so excited, im so pleased for you. i'm going to be thinking of you on monday afternoon,and sending you lots of good vibes. i feel really excited for you, i know its going to be great...

xxx grace

sal
08-07-04, 21:32
Hi Sarah[Wow!]

Good on you. Just read all the posts and you have done really well. 18 months is a long time out of work and you seemed to have adjusted to going back really well.

Bet you cant wait to start next week. Even a few weeks earlier than planned.

Word seems to have got about that you are up to working and everyone seems to want you.

Pleased you negotiated a higher pay. Hope you used our female charm!!! LOL

Even the next job youve been offered in August, although further to travel, who knows by then the confidence you will build from this job, you might find it a lot easier than you do now.

Good luck and i hope you really enjoy it. Let us know how you are getting on.

Take care.

Love Sal xxxx[:P]

andrew
09-07-04, 14:24
hi sarah, really pleased to read so much is going your way.
but i was thinking your mates were phoning each other to say 'lock up your boyfriends - SARAH'S BACK IN TOWN' lol. hope next week goes well, you take care........andrew

sarah
09-07-04, 22:52
Hiya guys

yes It definately feels like a conspiracy is going on but the thing is, these 2 mates of mine didnt get on at work at all, in fact they hated each other so there is no way on earth that they have been talking...lol

bizzarre huh?

love Sarah
xx

we arent mad, just the next stage of evolution :)

sarah
13-07-04, 13:06
Hello people

Ive just come in from my second short stint at work and thought I would update you.

Yesterday i went in at 2pm and from the minute I got there I was panicking. I had waves of nausea and feeling faint and it took forever to calm myself down. While they were training me I was tring to listen but I almost couldnt understand a word anyone was saying I felt so rough.

Because of the nature of the work it means I have to take my clothes off and put on a hood,mask,suit,boots,gloves,apron and arm shields. And then get locked in a cleanroom with isolators.[Ugh]

I knew what I was letting myself in for as I have done this sort of work for 12 years but it was so hot and claustraphobic that all I could see was me running squealing and ripping off my clothes trying to get out.[:I]

Fortunately I managed not to and I lasted my full 3 hours and went home exhausted but pleased that I had stuck it out.

I was so tired last night (you all know how much this panic takes out of you), I had a bath and went to bed at 10:30. Try as I might I couldnt get to sleep. My brain was racing and going over things I had done and needed to do the next day, worrying how I would feel etc..you know the score? The last time I looked at the clock it was 3am!!!!

So today I had to go in for 9am...I left the house at 7:30 feeling crappy for lack of sleep and got there on time.....early even as I didnt know what the traffic would be like.

I had a cuppa and then went to change into my suit etc. Did some paperwork, assembled some drugs for manufacture, checked them once they were made, did some validation work so I can manufacture when I go in on the 26th and before I knew it, it was lunchtime and my hometime. I had NO bad feelings whatsoever. I didnt have time to feel bad...lol. I had such a good time feeling normal that I am looking foreward to having a good nights sleep and going in again tomorrow.

thanks for listening:)

love Sarah
xx


we arent mad, just the next stage of evolution :)

Meg
13-07-04, 13:22
Sarah , thats great news ...

Well done for sticking through the difficult time yesterday...

Enjoy tomorrow and then you get a rest before you start on the 26th . Will that be fulltime hours ?

You must be so proud of yourself


Meg

Anxiety is a thin stream of fear trickling through the mind.
If encouraged, it cuts a channel into which all other thoughts are drained.
Robert Albert Bloch

nomorepanic
13-07-04, 18:49
Hey Sarah

We had a quick chat last night and I congratulated you then - so thought I would say "well done again".

Glad today was better and I hope when you go back again then it will be like 2nd nature.

Keep up the good work ok and try to get some sleep tonight!

xxx

Nicola

jo-jo
13-07-04, 21:49
Wow Sarah!

You are a shining example to us all - well done you for sticking out those horrid feelings for so long and for getting through it. It just goes to show that if you can last out it makes it so much better the next time. Bet you'll be back into your old work routine in next to no time at all.

I'm so chuffed for you, you are a star [^]

Lots of love and best wishes Jo xxxxx

sarah
13-07-04, 23:01
:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

thanks you guys.

Its taken a lot of hard work from me but also a lot of reassurance and egging on from you guys so thankyou!!!!!!!!

Im actually looking foreward to tomorrow!!!!!![Wow!]

love Sarah
xxxxx

we arent mad, just the next stage of evolution :)

sarah
26-07-04, 17:58
Hiya Guys

Ive just come in from my 1st full day at work for 18 months.
Im absolutely shattered, dead on my feet but I did it, was fine all day and just kept thinking that this could be the beginning of the old me coming back!!!:D

Im going to treat myself to a chinese or a pizza tonight...lol[Yeah!]

thanks guys

love Sarah
xx

we arent mad, just the next stage of evolution :)

Meg
26-07-04, 18:06
Could ??? It looks like yoiu are already back !

Well done Sarah. I know how much work you've put into this .

Congratulations

Love

Meg

jo-jo
26-07-04, 19:02
Hey Sarah fantastic stuff [^]

Hope you enjoy your extremely well deserved take-away [Yeah!]

Lots of love Jo xxx

nomorepanic
26-07-04, 20:15
Hey !

Well done - not seen you for a while and wondered how you were.

Come in chat soon and say hi to us all again.

Hope you enjoy the treat tonight too!

xxx

Nicola

sarah
20-08-04, 13:42
Hi Guys

I havent updated you on how I am doing for no reason other than im lazy...lol[|)]

Anyway, ive been working for 4 weeks now and its gone brilliantly, ive loved every minute (apart from the infrequent minor panics that have dissapeared as soon as I told them to).:D

Ive only got one more day there next monday so im sad about that but....... Ive just been for an interview this morning way out of my field of expertise so to speak. Ive got the job!!!!! Its only temporary to cover while they find permanent staff but you will never guess what im going to be doing!!!![?]

Ok, I will tell you...lol Im going to be an estate agent!!!...lol working with Steve (my hubby). He will be my manager but ive told him im not going to take any bull from him so we will see what happens (probably kill each other)- he didnt interview me, the area manager did...lol[xx(]

My head is in a spin now as im waiting to hear about the job in harley street that ive mentioned to some of you (running my own oncology clinic!!!) but that possibly wont start until november ish.[^]

My god what has happened to me?????????
I still feel like hiding away but these opportunities have come up and I don feel I should say no in case I relapse if I stop!!

thanks for listening
love Sarah
xx

we arent mad, just the next stage of evolution :)

sarah
20-08-04, 14:01
Hiya

Oh god, ive got another update already and its only been 10 minutes since the last!!!

Ive just checked my email and the lady I sent my CV to about the Harley street job had replied that she is very interested and asked when is convenient for us to meet!!!!!

Its not what you know its who you know as this job hasnt been advertised anywhere and I only found out about it through my boss and friend at the clinic where I am working now. Apparently this lady is good friends with my boss and asked if she knew anyone who would be suitable and she recommended me...little old nutty me...lol.

The good thing is, she knows all about my panic so i have nothing to hide. And she knows I was agoraphobic and that I had to try out the train journey the other week to see if I could get there and she is still interested!! She sounds lovely!!!

Ohh now I am all in a tizz...lol

love Sarah
xx

we arent mad, just the next stage of evolution :)

sal
20-08-04, 14:02
Hi Sarah

You are doing really well at the moment, definately a success story now.

It is great that you have got the job in the estate agents, and you are right to tell Steve although he is your boss you will take no bull LOL

Just remind him who is really the boss?? I bet he is well proud of you, you are doing so well.

I hope the job in harley street comes of for you as you sounded really positive and just what you want to do. I am sure the way you are going now it will all work out.

You must be really proud of yourself, you have come so far.

Good luck with the new job and remember who is really the boss LOL



Love Sal xxxxx

kate
20-08-04, 14:49
Hi Sarah,

Sooooooooooooooo pleased for you, WELL DONE [^]:D[8D];)

Luv Kate x

Meg
20-08-04, 16:45
Sarah,

You are brilliant. You've worked so hard at this .

The world is your oyster now.

Choices and options galore !!

Love

Meg

nomorepanic
20-08-04, 17:18
Hey do we have a cured Sarah at last [^][8D]:D

So pleased for you mate - you deserve it all too.

Am I losing one of my moderators to the real world again now - lol.

Best of luck with it all and keep us posted.

Good that they know your limitations in the new job - they will be more understanding.

Go out and celebrate now [Yeah!]:)

Nicola

jo-jo
20-08-04, 18:22
What wonderful news Sarah!

Well done you, you deserve it all :D:D:D

Can't wait to hear how your new job and the Harley St clinic thing go.

Lots of love and congratulation, Jo xxxx

Caz Fab Pants
20-08-04, 19:03
Sarah,

Cant believe I've never come across this post before, just read the entire 3pgs and cant believe how far you've come. You're AMAZING!!!

Cant wait to hear what's next for you and how work is going. Please try and sprinkle some of your confidence dust this way so I can start planning Taylor's birthday.

Well done babe, you're a star!! :D

Caroline :)
x

sarah
22-08-04, 17:28
Hiya Guys

Thanks for your kind words.
I couldnt have done it without your support!!!!:D

I will definately keep you posted...Ive got over the tizz I was in and am now excited in a nervous kind of way...lol

Caz - im definately sending you some confidence dust mate even though you have been doing really well too!!!

Nic - Thanks babe. You wont lose me unless you dont need me. I just wont be sitting here all day checking in every hour...lol

Meg, Kate, Jo - Thankyou for your support guys, its much appreciated!

Sal - Dont worry, he knows who is boss. His area manager who intervieved me told me not to take any bull from Steve so I think ive got someone on my side there already....lol

take care all, I hope you are having a good weekend!!!

love Sarah
xx


we arent mad, just the next stage of evolution :)

lilac kitten
23-08-04, 12:43
Sarah,

What fabulous news on the job front (fingers crossed). I'm so glad to see you are feeling more positive and confident - carry on like that and you definitely will be an inspiration to all of us.

Keep us posted.

Ruth
x

sarah
31-08-04, 17:38
Oh God

Wish me luck guys, im just leaving for an interview for the job that I really really want and ive got real bad butterflies. i feel sick and dizzy and im truly bricking it.

Send me good vibes!!!!!!:D

love Sarah
xx

sal
31-08-04, 17:40
Thinking of you Sarah

And sending you loads of good luck.

Let us know how it goes.



Love Sal xxxxx

nomorepanic
31-08-04, 17:49
Good vibes coming your way mate :D[^]

Hope it goes well!

xxx

Nicola

Meg
31-08-04, 18:04
Is it that one on the train line or something new ...??


Good luck Sarah

Love
Meg

Karen
31-08-04, 19:12
Good luck Sarah.

Briary

sarah
31-08-04, 22:01
Hiya Guys

Thanks for your vibes...I must have got them :D

The interview was in a nice wine bar so it was nice and informal - but seeing as im still not comfortable in pubs etc it was still a nice hurdle that I sucessfully jumped...lol

I got there half an hour early so I could calm myself down and get used to being there before she got there too.

Interview went well (I think), we chatted a lot, she showed me the architects plans and asked for my approval on them and kept saying 'we' will do this and 'we' can do that so it gave me the impression that I will get the job.

Only thing is, she is seeing someone else tomorrow but she said she had to confess that I was her preferred candidate so although its looking good, its not a foregone conclusion. She will let me know by the end of the week. [?]

Oh well fingers crossed for me guys, I dont want to gwt excited but I already am...lol

Yes Meg, its the job in London that I mentioned when I met you guys. (Oncology pharmacy clinic).

take care all

Love Sarah
xx

we arent mad, just the next stage of evolution :)

nomorepanic
31-08-04, 22:27
Hey mate

So proud of you!!

The job you want eh? that is so cool

I am so chuffed for you really!

Let us know what happens ok

xxx

Fingers crossed ok


Nicola

sal
31-08-04, 23:57
Hi Sarah

Well done mate you have done really well. Sounds like you might have it in the hat and i really do hope you have for your sake.

Sounds like she made it clear she wants you for the job and obviously has to go through the procedures of interviewing other to make it fair and square.

Let us know as soon as you know the result, and we all have our fingers crossed.

This is just what you wanted and you deserve it.

Well done for jumping yet another hurdle and coping with it.



Love Sal xxxxx

Karen
01-09-04, 00:42
Hi Sarah

Well done. It sounds like it went really well. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you.

Briary

sarah
01-09-04, 11:42
Thanks guys

Im now doing the over analysing bit and wondering if I have bitten off more than I can chew....lol
Bit shakey today but then I guess thats normal anyway.

Forgot to tell you that I am doing some temporary work with Steve in the estate agents where he works while he has staff problems. I had my first day there last friday and it all went really well. I dealt with people over the phone but spent the whole day staring at the door willing people to not come in and deal with me face to face....lol. The pay is pants but its keeping me busy and in work until this other job hopefully starts.

Take care all

love Sarah
xx

Meg
01-09-04, 16:05
You did mention about the estate agent thing . I wondered whether it had come to anything !!
Good for you . Get it on the CV .

Everything crossed for the outcome to the interview .

You know and we know you can do it.

Having to pass John Lewis at the end of the road each day will surely convince you ! lol.





Meg

Anxiety is a thin stream of fear trickling through the mind.
If encouraged, it cuts a channel into which all other thoughts are drained.
Robert Albert Bloch

sarah
01-09-04, 16:55
Hi Meg

Hmmmm John Lewis...that was the clinching factor....LOL

love Sarah
xx

sarah
05-09-04, 11:37
:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

I GOT THE JOB!!!!!!!!!!!!


:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

Im extatic and panicking all at the same time...lol

I start in November and will be working from home for the first 2 months or so. Thats going to ease me in nicely.

Im still working in the estate agents in the meantime and its going good. Giving me loads of confidence in dealing with people so things are on the up for sure.

I just want to thank you guys for your support and advice and listening to me going on about this...lol
You have all been great!!!

love Sarah
xx

we arent mad, just the next stage of evolution :)

Meg
05-09-04, 13:39
Sarah,


Many congratulations !!

To say I'm thrilled for you is an understatement .
You deserve this so much and you will be a complete success at it as you are a much stronger person then when you were made redundant.

Its a promotion for you too isn't it ? Got a nice package too I hope.

I hope Steve is being extra gracious.

Oh and you'll need to update your occupation on your profile again too !!

love and all best wishes

Meg

nomorepanic
05-09-04, 14:11
Hey wow mate :D[^]

Bet you feel so good now don't you?

This will be the start of a new beginning for you and you will do well at it.

Hope you got loads of money and extras from it?

Great news all round [Yeah!][Wow!]

xxx

Nicola

Karen
05-09-04, 15:11
Hi Sarah

Congratulations on getting the job. That's fantastic news:).

Love
Briary xx

jill
12-09-04, 21:29
Hi Sarah

Words fail me it,s fantastic to read a succsuccess story like yours,
Good luck in your new job.

Jill :D :D

sal
12-09-04, 23:16
Hi Sarah

Just posted you so not sure where that went.

I am so pleased for you and feel really guility while i was dwelling on my problems i didnt see how well you have done.

You have done so well and i am so proud of you. You are a great success story when we know what you went through.

So sorry i let you down and wasnt there to share in your success, just hope you can forgive me. Part of anxiety coming out as i feel so bad i missed your post and wasnt there to support you when you have done so well. SORRY

You will do great in this post and it is what you wanted.

Good luck and be proud of yourself hon.



Love Sal xxxxx

sarah
13-09-04, 21:23
Hiya

Thanks for your support and well wishes guys, it means a lot, you know it does!!!!

Sal - Dont worry about missing the post hon, I know how naff you have been feeling and dont expect a pat on the back from everyone on the site...lol

I in turn have to apologise to you for not being there for you while you are feeling bad, im really sorry hon..but you do know that I think about how you are doing and if you need me I am always here for you ok?. I read every post every day but for some reason I have had no inclination to answer any. Im in a world of my own, totally overwhelmed and HATE working with my husband in the estate agents. Its bad enough that im married to him let alone being with him at work for 12 hours a day. Now im beginning to see what an ass he really is.

Im doubting myself at the moment, having mini panics everyday and if it wasnt for the fact that I would be letting Steve down I dont think I would be there every day. Im so tired I dont know what to do with myself and I feel terrible. (not quite the smooth sailing sucess after all eh?)

I know it will get better but feeling like this makes me doubt my usefulness as a hard ass city girl...lol. Ho hum....time will tell eh?

take care
love Sarah
xx

we arent mad, just the next stage of evolution :)

Meg
13-09-04, 22:11
Sarah,

Oh dear... Your mini panics are most probably to do with emotional marital stuff and the bad energy in the office rather than anything to do with where you are each day . It will not pull you down. Recognise why it is and don't let it affect you .

Being frustrated is very tiring never mind trying to learn a whole new role that isn't opf your choosing overnight it's not suprising that you are so knackered and overwhlemed.

You will be much better off when you have your own environment at work and are in your own arena of expertize.

As for Steve, remember what it was about him that drew you together in the past and assess whats changed .

Is it you having achieved so much that now he doesn't have that same attraction , is it the alcohol influence on him , is it his coping mechanism now that roles have completly altered at home and you are no longer dependent on him and thus don't give in to his foibles so much etc etc

We are here for you Sarah . ..

Love

Meg

sal
14-09-04, 00:28
Hi Sarah

Sorry to see you are having mini panics at the moment and know how hard they are to cope with. You have been doing so well and i am sure it is temporary and once you start your new job, you will gain that independance you need.

Can imagine it must be hard working with Steve as you must feel like you never get time out, but look forward to what you have coming up. I am sure you will excell yourself in your new job, its what you want to do and remember where you are at the moment, is a major step forward for you, working and working with Steve and managing a position you went into without the knowledge.

You have cracked that so if you remember how bad you were, look how well you have done. Even people who dont suffer find an occupation alien to them hard so you have done really well.



Love Sal xxxxx

lainey
15-09-04, 09:04
Hi Sarah

Just read all 5 pages of your post, what an inspiration to us all, you show that we can get over our problems with time and support.

Sorry to hear you are not enjoying you rtime working with Steve but just look forward to you new job in November.

Take care chuck

Elaine x

sarah
15-09-04, 20:37
Hiya all

Lainey - thanks for your post. I partly wrote all this because I needed help and support but also to document it to let all you guys know how it can be done..like you say with time and support and pure bloody mindedness...lol

Meg & Sal - Thanks guys, yep, you are right...just temporary blips. A lot of it does have to do with the way I see Steve now. He drives me crazy with his innefficiency, im running after him all the time telling him what to do next ive almost become his personal secretary. The alcohol thing still gets to me, not so much the drinking of it but the attitude that comes with it! He thinks everything is going really well in the office, even tho ive told him how I feel.

Meg - I cant even remember what attracted me to him in the 1st place, I was 18 when we met and im 31 now...LOL

Never mind, im working back at the hospital with my mate for a day tomorrow, she needed me and I told steve to shove it for a day...lol

take care all
love Sarah
xx

sal
15-09-04, 22:18
Hi Sarah

Hope your day goes really well hon. Can see how hard it has been for you getting used to a new job then picking up the pieces for Steve. Guess he felt as you were there you would be his right hand basically.

Hard to remember what attracted to you after all this time but must have been worth it at the time, just hope you can remember that and work through it, but you need his full time support.

Good luck tomorrow and enjoy it mate.



Love Sal xxxxx

sarah
16-09-04, 18:01
Hiya Sal

Thanks mate, I had a great day today, felt like I was finally doing something I could do in my sleep...lol
No panics at all....must be allergic to estate agency...or my husband.....lol

love Sarah
xx

sal
16-09-04, 23:40
Hi Sarah

Keep us posted how you are getting on hon



Love Sal xxxxx

nomorepanic
19-09-04, 21:25
Hi Sarah

Sorry to hear that things are not so well.

It could be that working with Steve is not a good idea so when you move on it will put some distance between yourself.

Chin up mate - you can do it ok?
xx

Nicola

sal
19-09-04, 23:13
Hi Sarah

How is it going at the moment hon?



Love Sal xxxxx