Orange Lightning
31-08-13, 18:01
This is a companion post to my other one on the HA/Hypochondria board. I'm aiming to throw out everything wrong with me in one go, so apologies if I depress anyone in the process. Basically, there's not a single good thing about me. I'd find it easiest to point out why in a bulleted list:
1) I'm an Outcast. A nerd right down to the spotty skin, glasses and dorky laugh. I read manga, play video games and more stereotypical nonsense. And nobody shares my interests, especially not the public who laugh at me in the streets, or my family who tell me to stop wasting my life.
2) I'm sub-standard at everything. I'm very easy to fool and extremely stupid with logic; sure I can do a little maths, but I couldn't tell you what most common words in society mean.
3) I'm a Gay, Asexual Furry. There's no greater recipe for loneliness. I've never had a date, have very few friends and I'm horribly shy. My parents don't believe I'm gay because I've never had a date, and I don't dare tell them I'm a furry. All my attempts to bond with others fail in an almost epic manner. It's embarrassing really.
4) To this day, I am STILL bullied by people younger than me. I've been prodding, pushed into thorn bushes and verbally assaulted constantly. Why me? All I did was walk down the street to the next bus stop.
5) I'm bogged down with LPR reflux, and nobody wants anything to do with it or me. They're all happy to tell me its just "In my head" and leave me to think suicidal thoughts.
6) I feel guilty about everything. I can't stop lying to my parents about small things, and I want to move away from them to recover my independence. That makes me feel guilty to, for hating my parents the way I do.
I feel like God's idea of a joke. An introvert doomed to a life of suffering in solitude, both socially and in health. Despite saying I'm looking for love, I just want to be alone. Run away from the world so they can't mock me, and if my LPR reflux gets the better of my mind at last, I want to be somewhere where I can die without harming anyone close to me. To round off, I'll quote a character from a favourite video game of mine:
"Just go the hell away..! All the world needs is me. I don't get people. Never have, never will."
Sorry if my post is a bit nonsensical. I just typed without thinking, it helps to get it all out faster this way. Thank you.
1) I'm an Outcast. A nerd right down to the spotty skin, glasses and dorky laugh. I read manga, play video games and more stereotypical nonsense. And nobody shares my interests, especially not the public who laugh at me in the streets, or my family who tell me to stop wasting my life.
2) I'm sub-standard at everything. I'm very easy to fool and extremely stupid with logic; sure I can do a little maths, but I couldn't tell you what most common words in society mean.
3) I'm a Gay, Asexual Furry. There's no greater recipe for loneliness. I've never had a date, have very few friends and I'm horribly shy. My parents don't believe I'm gay because I've never had a date, and I don't dare tell them I'm a furry. All my attempts to bond with others fail in an almost epic manner. It's embarrassing really.
4) To this day, I am STILL bullied by people younger than me. I've been prodding, pushed into thorn bushes and verbally assaulted constantly. Why me? All I did was walk down the street to the next bus stop.
5) I'm bogged down with LPR reflux, and nobody wants anything to do with it or me. They're all happy to tell me its just "In my head" and leave me to think suicidal thoughts.
6) I feel guilty about everything. I can't stop lying to my parents about small things, and I want to move away from them to recover my independence. That makes me feel guilty to, for hating my parents the way I do.
I feel like God's idea of a joke. An introvert doomed to a life of suffering in solitude, both socially and in health. Despite saying I'm looking for love, I just want to be alone. Run away from the world so they can't mock me, and if my LPR reflux gets the better of my mind at last, I want to be somewhere where I can die without harming anyone close to me. To round off, I'll quote a character from a favourite video game of mine:
"Just go the hell away..! All the world needs is me. I don't get people. Never have, never will."
Sorry if my post is a bit nonsensical. I just typed without thinking, it helps to get it all out faster this way. Thank you.