This is not a dress rehearsal

[skippy66]

Once you've lived this life you will not get a chance to say 'ok, let's do it again but this time I won't waste most of it worrying about whether I was seriously ill or not'.

Get out there and live your life to the full with the hand you've been dealt. You may have pain, twitching, palpitations etc and I sympathise with that but there are people in a FAR WORSE situation than you living their lives to the full as we speak, making the most of what they have. I see countless threads about floaters and spots in vision - lots of people are BLIND and they enjoy their life. DO NOT DWELL on your symptoms. Nobody is perfect, everyone has something or other wrong with them. It's how you deal with that that counts.

If you do anything tomorrow, make a pledge to yourself to stop worrying about what might or might not be wrong with your body and just get on with it. If this sounds harsh it's because it's designed to - I wish someone had grabbed me by the scruff of the neck when I was 22 and said "don't waste the next 8 years of your life worrying about your health because when you get to 30 you'll look back in absolute horror at what you have not made the most of."

Life is about quality not quantity. We're obsessed with trying to make this journey last as long as we possibly can without actually enjoying the journey itself. The destination is death, for everyone, and nobody knows when that will happen for them so we just need to live our lives to the absolute full and STOP OBSESSING. Death is nothing to be scared of, think of all the millions of years you didn't exist before you were born. I'm wasting time even writing this, so I'm going to stop now and watch my favourite TV show, 24 Hours in A&E (just kidding).

GET YOUR LIVES BACK, starting NOW.

[panicperson]

I think people with HA do try to do this. But it's not as easy as its said!
I have clear moments when I do the above. But when my body is acting crazy, my mind automatically follows! That's the frustrating thing!

I already know ill regret feeling like this. I have now wasted a year of my life like this. The first year if my daughters life. I won't get that back!
But still, as I lay here with my numb leg and tingles in shoulder, it's difficult to think that nothing is wrong!

I'm glad and really happy you have got over your HA. It's nice to know people do get over it.

[skippy66]

I appreciate how difficult it is 'in the moment', but the alternative (life wasted by HA) has become far more scary to me than any symptom.

Beating this requires a change in attitude. It's not easy but it is possible.

[panicperson]

Yeah I get that thank you!
I totally get you!

[xvolatileheart]

I agree with panicperson. It's like telling a depressed person to "just think positive!" If it were that easy, we would all be cured. Nothing makes me feel worse than reminding myself how good my life is, how lucky I am compared to others, how great my friends and family are, how many great opportunities I have, etc. and yet I suffer daily. I've wasted nearly two years of my life feeling like this and if it were as easy as just changing my mindset, I would've been cured by now. It can be very damaging to tell people that they aren't doing enough to fix their problem. What if they're giving it all they can, truly trying their best to make a change - diet, exercise, therapy, reading books, thinking positive, etc. and yet it doesn't go away? Does that mean they're doing something wrong? Ironically, my anxiety stems from the relentless desire to be perfect, so this way of thinking only adds to my feeling that it's my fault that I'm not good enough.

Sorry for the rant, but for many of us, there is a deeply rooted anxiety that may have a chemical cause or may need years of therapy. We need to be gentle with ourselves and each other.

[Fishmanpa]

It can be very damaging to tell people that they aren't doing enough to fix their problem.

It is equally as damaging to seek reinforcement of your symptoms. While it may offer some comfort in the short term to know others are experiencing similar issues, it also feeds the negativity and helps it grow in the long term. In many cases as with many things in life, you need to divorce yourself from a situation, thing or environment to help you to move on.

[skippy66]

Sorry for the rant, but for many of us, there is a deeply rooted anxiety that may have a chemical cause or may need years of therapy. We need to be gentle with ourselves and each other.

I really don't think the 'gentle' approach stands a chance of getting anyone out of the vicious cycle of HA. This is borne out of my own experience.

I once rang a doctor after my nose ran in the night, terrified that I may have suffered a leakage of cerebrospinal fluid (courtesy of Dr Google). Do you know what the doctor said over the phone?

She laughed at me.

At the time I was horrified and angry, but in hindsight it did me the world of good as it exposed the ridiculous level my HA had reached. If we mollycoddle everyone with HA then nobody is going to beat it - it just offers short term reassurance which does not work.

People do not want to hear any kind of 'man up' message, I get that. I was the same. The problem is, that message is sometimes the only thing that works.

[panicperson]

Is there a part if you that still has HA, in order to still use this forum?x

[Fishmanpa]

I came here to learn more about the malady/illness called HA. To say my eyes were opened is an understatement.

As one who has had two heart attacks, bypass surgery, stents and most recently battled oral cancer, I can confidently say I can respond to posts that relate to those subjects with experience, knowledge and confidence.

I can also say with confidence that 99.9% of those posting with these fears are just fine. I'm not a doctor nor can one diagnose via the web but I'm willing to place a sizable bet I'm right.

Ultimately, one must take it upon themselves to seek help to address the illness called anxiety. No website, forum nor reassurance can stop the vicious cycle. Skippy is spot on! In this environment, it takes a cyber slap upside the head to gain any attention. Otherwise, this becomes part of the cycle that feeds the affliction, no different than Dr.Google.

Best wishes and positive thoughts to those afflicted. Open your eyes, the answers are plain to see if you're willing to look.

[Brunette]

I completely agree with Skippy and Fishmanpa.

[debs71]

I am in agreement with both opinions here.

I have suffered with anxiety/panic attacks on and off for the past 9 years, and in my opinion - as someone who has actively sought out external help via standard medication and 18 weeks of counselling, and support from sites such as this FANTASTIC one - I can see that many things contribute to addressing a sufferers plight, and no one thing is better than the other. Everyone is an individual, and each to their own as to where they find the most comfort and help.....BUT....

.....for me the primary thing that has helped me is self-help, bloody mindedness and sheer determination that I cannot bear my life being lead by my conditions. I agree that a lot of the fight with mental health conditions has to come from YOU, and nobody else. You have to face the things that terrify you most. There is no other solution, and meds and therapy only go so far. I have MADE myself leave the house whilst sweat pours down my face, stayed there with my heart coming through my chest and wanting to run out of a shop, and been talking to people in social environments while my mind is screaming get me out of here, and it is hell, but I do it. It is hard but it has to be done to beat down anxiety.

In saying this, anxiety and connected conditions like panic, agorophobia, social anxiety are so hard to just tell oneself ' life is short, get over it'. It just does not work like that and is just not as cut and dried as that. It takes a lot of inner strength to face a fear like leaving the house or joining in social occasions, etc. for someone paralysed by fear, so I'm afraid ranting and pep talks don't always work.

The person themselves have to find a point in their life where they have simply had it with their condition, and that is where I got to personally, and where I am now (albeit clinging by a very thin thread right now with a bad return of my anxiety and panic)

I don't agree entirely that forums such as this where everyone shares don't help. In the big world out there it is AWFUL when you cannot find anyone who can relate to you, or share your feelings and thoughts with, which are most of the time so addled and frightening, and anyone that hasn't had a mental health issue is bamboozled. That is very lonely for someone suffering, and it is human nature to want to find people like yourself.

The flip side of this is that I do agree there there comes a point where you NEED to cut off from the subject of anxiety once you feel better within yourself, as it helps move you on. This is what I did a few years ago when I left this forum. I felt in myself I needed to for my recovery and progression, but not with ANY malice or resentment, but because I needed that at the time.

I am now in the stages of a return of high anxiety and panic, and so the first place I wanted to go back to was my like-minded people who 'get me', as I know that talking about things and trying to help others helps me a lot.

It is all about balance in the end, and finding your own way of helping but confronting your condition. You need to take responsibility for your own recovery, but in YOUR way, not other people's.