the dude
25-10-06, 01:23
Hey everyone, Hope youre all doing well...
I need to vent again and I always feel comfortable coming here to let off some steam.
First off, the summer had its highs and lows, But for the most part I was feeling pretty good. Fall came and I started to feel a bit more stressed (I'm not too fond fo winter as my major panic attack was last January)...
Anyway, Ive been doing allright but the past week or so has been pretty brutal. I've noticed that so much of my anxiety goes all the way back to my childhood. I'm determined to break the cycle, but I HATE when i fall back into the same old routine. If i started to feel not-so-well in the summer I'd move on...but now things are piling up and i'm noticing things I do and it feels so frustrating when I feel lik ei cant control it.
I havent been exercising nearly as much as the summer now that school started. School has been going well, but I got sick for about a week, missed classes and am worried about failing a Math exam (not fond of math at all)...I cant afford to fail this because my financial aid has run out. I noticed that it wouldve been better to do work for class while sick...but its a bit late for that.
I'm also in need of a job and sorta screwed myself for not following through with one in particular.
all this aside, I was still doing allright...
then my band started to implode...We just recorded at the end of sumemr and we're already breaking up. But thats life, a bit fo drama, huh?
then I started speaking to this girl...and I'd post this part but i'd rather not post it publicly (not liek its anything bad, just somethign i'd rather privately talk to someone about...but i started to talk to my friend(s) about it and I look like a fool for getting WAYYY to ahead of myself. Basically this ends up in higher anxiety and a bit of depression...
I also feel really lethargic and weak recently (having been eating too great and my exercise pattens are gone)...
jeez...[B)]
I keep trying to tell myself "these arent productive thoughts, try to look ont he upside...but theres so much going on I dont know where to start again.
I told myself "this semester will be different" But right now it seems at the peak of the workload, all this junk piled up at once and I dont know where to get a grip.[V]
I really want to start CBT, but i dont even think i'd have time to devote to it now with my schedule....Plus i'm so broke, its silly.
But its not all bad...
From the ashes of my old band, this new project is getting started which after a first jam session saounded really good.
Plus, I dont have much of a problem with speakign to people/girls...But i actually initiated a conversation (although i was a bit shy. haha) so thats not bad.
ahhhhhh...venting.
Now back to schoolwork.
I need to vent again and I always feel comfortable coming here to let off some steam.
First off, the summer had its highs and lows, But for the most part I was feeling pretty good. Fall came and I started to feel a bit more stressed (I'm not too fond fo winter as my major panic attack was last January)...
Anyway, Ive been doing allright but the past week or so has been pretty brutal. I've noticed that so much of my anxiety goes all the way back to my childhood. I'm determined to break the cycle, but I HATE when i fall back into the same old routine. If i started to feel not-so-well in the summer I'd move on...but now things are piling up and i'm noticing things I do and it feels so frustrating when I feel lik ei cant control it.
I havent been exercising nearly as much as the summer now that school started. School has been going well, but I got sick for about a week, missed classes and am worried about failing a Math exam (not fond of math at all)...I cant afford to fail this because my financial aid has run out. I noticed that it wouldve been better to do work for class while sick...but its a bit late for that.
I'm also in need of a job and sorta screwed myself for not following through with one in particular.
all this aside, I was still doing allright...
then my band started to implode...We just recorded at the end of sumemr and we're already breaking up. But thats life, a bit fo drama, huh?
then I started speaking to this girl...and I'd post this part but i'd rather not post it publicly (not liek its anything bad, just somethign i'd rather privately talk to someone about...but i started to talk to my friend(s) about it and I look like a fool for getting WAYYY to ahead of myself. Basically this ends up in higher anxiety and a bit of depression...
I also feel really lethargic and weak recently (having been eating too great and my exercise pattens are gone)...
jeez...[B)]
I keep trying to tell myself "these arent productive thoughts, try to look ont he upside...but theres so much going on I dont know where to start again.
I told myself "this semester will be different" But right now it seems at the peak of the workload, all this junk piled up at once and I dont know where to get a grip.[V]
I really want to start CBT, but i dont even think i'd have time to devote to it now with my schedule....Plus i'm so broke, its silly.
But its not all bad...
From the ashes of my old band, this new project is getting started which after a first jam session saounded really good.
Plus, I dont have much of a problem with speakign to people/girls...But i actually initiated a conversation (although i was a bit shy. haha) so thats not bad.
ahhhhhh...venting.
Now back to schoolwork.