My son has anxiety :(

[Annie0904]

My son has been having stomach problems for a few weeks now and has been to the doctors. The doctor has done some tests and has said he is sure it is anxiety. He has always been quite nervous and I remember the week before he started uni, he was physically sick with thinking about going. He did however settle well and finished uni with first class honours.
He is now working in quite a pressurised job and I guess this has increased his anxiety. I feel bad that this could be learned behaviour from me but I guess it is hard to know if it is nurture or nature. My Dad suffers from anxiety and so did his Mother (my Grandma).
I don't really know my purpose in writing this post accept to share with you something that is troubling me at the moment and to have someone to share it with. It is hard to suffer from this myself but even harder to see one of my children go through it too :(

[MRS STRESS ED]

aw sooooo sorry your sons got anxiety, its horrible we know :weep:please don't think its anything to do with yourself, it can run in families my brother has it my granddad had It aswel as myself and mum . Sending you both some :hugs::hugs:

[celticlass62]

Hi annie my son suffers from school phobia.
and he also suffers from aniexty takes that from me as i suffer real bad with it.
he passed all his exames so i was very happy with him.
i hope your son starts toget better very soon.
lots of love to you
celticlass xxxx:hugs::hugs:

[Annie0904]

Thank you Mrs Stressed I was wondering if maybe he could get some cbt before it gets any worse, I will ask him to ask his doctor about it. hugs back for you :hugs::hugs::hugs:

---------- Post added at 17:40 ---------- Previous post was at 17:37 ----------

Thank you celticlass and I am sorry that your son suffers too. I am pleased he has managed to pass his exams. In my last job I worked with some students who suffered from school phobia and it wasn't easy for them. :hugs::hugs:xx

[MRS STRESS ED]

Thank you Mrs Stressed I was wondering if maybe he could get some cbt before it gets any worse, I will ask him to ask his doctor about it. hugs back for you :hugs::hugs::hugs:

---------- Post added at 17:40 ---------- Previous post was at 17:37 ------
I would mention about cbt it could help him and keep his anxiety under control:hugs:

[Annie0904]

I will do, he has to go back to see his doctor in a couple of weeks.

[MRS STRESS ED]

I hope he is okay wishing you both well:hugs:

[Sparkle1984]

Hi Annie,
I'm so sorry to hear that your son has been diagnosed with anxiety. What sort of help has the doctor offered him? It can often run in families so don't blame yourself for it. I think your son did very well to get a first class degree. :hugs:

[Annie0904]

Thank you Sparkle. His doctor has done some more blood tests but said he is sure it is anxiety and wants him to go back in a couple of weeks to discuss it.

[kittikat]

So sorry to hear this Annie :hugs: but I know exactly how you are feeling as my son has had anxiety/depression too.

It was difficult for me as my son wouldn't admit to it and I had to physically take him to the doctors. He was put on citalopram and changed for the better almost overnight. My dad is a very anxious man too.

I hope your son gets the right treatment to help him soon & I know you will be there to support him which will be the best therapy for him - to know that you understand and care.

Thinking of you hun xxx Kitti xxx

[dally]

Hi Annie
I totally understand how you must feel.
A high pressured job would give a 'normal' person anxiety.

I have two children and both have witnessed me having a major panic attacks.
My daughter in particular couldn't 'learn' to have panic attacks if her life depended on it.
So either she doesn't have the 'anxiety gene' or our children cannot 'learn' panic attacks from us.:unsure:

At least your son will have a very knowledgable, informed mother to guide him, through the anxiety maize, as many of us have spent years wasting time searching for 'the cure'
You will be able to give him advice appropriate to his situation.
Sending kind thoughts to you and your son xxx

[Annie0904]

Thank you Kitti and Dally for your kind words. I have just ordered him a copy of Claire Weeks book as he likes to read so may benefit from it. He was lactose intolerant when he was younger and I am wondering if that has also resurfaced? I have suggested he switch from full cream milk to soya or goats milk for a while.

[bernie1977]

So sorry to hear this Annie. I hope he has a good Doctor who will get him help to stop the problem escalating. It's so much easier to deal with in the early stages. Like you say a course of CBT would be good. I wish him well Annie xx

[Annie0904]

Thank you Bernie. His doctor seems to be very understanding. Only trouble is he is moving in 3 weeks so I hope he gets a good one when he moves.

[fruity]

hey annie my son is only 5 & he,s suffering anxiety over school he is so nervous & isterical over it & it,s making him sick & nervouus. & in turn making me anxious & upset i have been to the school but i just can,t get him to go. it,s heartbreaking

[Annie0904]

I am sorry your son is struggling with school fruity :( Does he have any friends in school who you could maybe walk to school with and that might help?

[diane07]

Annie, my son is 24 and has suffered anx issues since he was young, my own personal advice is this, he has the best therapy in an understanding mother..

I say this as many years ago when i first suffered panic attacks, it wasn't really heard of and my own mum could only try to understand, she was sympathetic but had no answers or wise words.....bless her she would never have understood.

What we have is experience and the understanding to know what our own are going through, and that itself means so much.

My own son has learned to come to me in any anx moments and i can take away his fears, it has taken a few years but it can be done.

We can be strong enough to pick ourselves up, dust ourselves down and help guide our loved ones.

If you need a hand just holler.

Di x

[NE21 worrier]

There's nothing better for a son than a mum who understands and is always there. I'm probably a bit of Mummy's boy, still living at home as I do, but then I think I always will be close to my mum.

My dad is a much quieter character, however he drinks too much and I feel he is consumed by his worries, though he will not do anything about them. My mum gets stressed in a general sense but does not have anxiety issues. However, working in mental health and having lived with me over the years, she has a good understanding of them.

And, sometimes when you feel as if you're at your lowest, that's all that counts. Knowing someone is there.

Thanks, Peter

[Annie0904]

Thank you Di and Peter. At least I know that he will come to me and talk to me if anything has bothered him, he has always been able to open up to me and talk things through. He doesn't seem to be letting it get on top of him. x

[Tessar]

somehow I missed this thread, Annie. I have to agree with you that it's good you know that your son will come to you and talk to you if anything has bothered him. It's so great to hear you describe the openness of your relationship with him. He is a credit to you and you to him.

[MRS STRESS ED]

aw Annie glad to here your sons not letting it get on top of him ,its good he can talk to you ,my son is the same he will tell me anything it lovely they can come to us, glad he seems to be doing okay :)

[Annie0904]

[/COLOR]
aw Annie glad to here your sons not letting it get on top of him ,its good he can talk to you ,my son is the same he will tell me anything it lovely they can come to us, glad he seems to be doing okay :)

Yes it is good that they can talk to us so easily, it shows that we have done something right :)

[daisydaisy]

Hi Annie, sorry I missed this. Wanted to write here as you have been so lovely to me so I know your son has a great Mum.

My Mum and I both suffer anxiety and I think it can run in families. Maybe part of it is learnt behaviours but I also just feel it's the way we're wired. I'm a very sensitive and emotional person (I wish I could stop that at times!) I am very lucky I have a great Mum who understands, like you do. I think its great that your son is possibly looking into other things too- I am lactose intolerant also and have had to cut back on various diary products- milk or cream is worst for me but I'm ok with mild cheeses. Has your son tried anything holistic like meditation/yoga or even exercise? I find that to be a great anxiety outlet at times, it doesn't necessarily cure everything but I feel it keeps me calm and centred when I feel unstable. Does his employer offer any counselling or could he self refer to a local service as perhaps this would help also.

Xx Daisy

[Annie0904]

Thank you Daisy, My son works freelance so is self employed and I guess that is quite stressful especially when clients don't pay up on time and he has no money! He has always been sensitive. He has had more blood tests done and his blood count is low and billirubins high. Mine are always high so I guess that could be genetic and normal for us.

[daisydaisy]

Annie I was just having that same conversation today with a family member who is self employed regarding not getting paid on time etc- I can't imagine how frustrating that must be. I am sure that adds to his stresses definitely. I hope he feels better soon. Xx

[Annie0904]

Thank you Daisy :)