Sob story(long)

[mackncody]

So my sister is sick and I had to take her to the doc today and her boyfriend came along since we are worried about her(she has a history of ulcers and ovarian cysts). While she was in seeing the doc, her boyfriend and I started chatting and he asked if I was going to vote this year. I said no(thinking back I wish I'm not honest to a fault) and he asked why and wouldn't leave it alone. He kept asking why not and I said I have more than one reason, one reason I gave him was I don't follow politics enough to really have a opinion. He wouldn't give up(I was panicking big time, almost to the stammering point) and finally said I have a panic disorder. Which shut him up pretty fast.

I know I shouldn't feel this way but now I wish more than anything I had lied. I wish I could take time back and change my answer. I feel dirty and exposed. I went home and cried and I now I feel ashamed and sad and furious. I want to be normal so bad. I feel like I'm crazy.

God I wish for a different life.

If nothing else...I will survive.

To: SSJHSMH-U are light and my heart and strength. I will protect you in this life or the next always.

[trac67]

Mate,

Never feel ashamed of suffering with anxiety and panic, it's something that just hits us out of the blue and we have no control over that, it just creeps up on us without us knowing.

If you had broken your leg you wouldn't be ashamed, we are stronger people by suffering with this as it takes so much more for us to do the everyday normal things that others take for granted.

I gave up trying to hide that I suffered, and I feel so much better for it now, and hey if people can't accept that I do suffer with this, then I am afraid it is their problem not mine and just shows how shallow they are.

So you hold you head up high as you have nothing to be ashamed about.

Love

Trac xx

'Live your life with arms wide open, today is where your book begins, the rest is still unwritten'

[mackncody]

Thank you Trac.

Your words helped a million times over.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx[:I][^]

If nothing else...I will survive.

To: SSJHSMH-U are light and my heart and strength. I will protect you in this life or the next always.

[Paddington]

i agree.I realised that to get welli had to admit i was ill,and others had to know too!So i told people if the need arose!Some understand others dont ,but who cares,it's ur life hun!Dont ever be ashamed ,i think that now you have opened up it will be a good and positive thing.No pretence,no need for fear!!See where i am coming from??;) dry your tears,the girl done good!Take care .love mary rose.xxxxxxxxxx

we are all in the same boat and can guide each other ashore

[yorkylover]

I totally agree with Trac's post.you have nothing to be ashamed of pet.
:D;):D

Ellen XX

[Ma Larkin]

Aw bless, I can totally sympathise with you because I work for our local 3 MP's and 57 councillors so I've been groomed on politics, but I too suffer from panic attacks and anxiety. I always tell people that voting is a personal thing, that's why it's a secret ballot. Even my own family don't know which party I vote for. You don't have to voice your opinions to anyone on politics, we all have our own opinions on how the country should be run and where our tax payers money should be spent. I don't want to bore you with politics but I can say never be anxious if people put you on the spot like that, you will come up with the right answer in the end. If you want to shut your sis's boyfriend up just remind him that only between 20 and 30% of people voted in this year's elections so you aren't on your own!! That should shut him up!

Please don't feel ashamed, you said nothing wrong and he shouldn't have pushed you like that, especially on something as complex as politics. The main reason why people don't vote is because they feel they don't know enough. Even I'm no expert and I work in politics. You don't have to lie about how you feel, hold your head up high and you will realise that you probably know more than you think.

Hope you feel better soon.

Take care.

Les, xx

[mackncody]

Thanks yall. Your kind words helped more than you know.

Ma Larkin: thanks for the statastic!

Damn I wish I could have just whopped him good! A punch to the face shuts anyone up!

No, I don't mean that, don't anyone go out punching people to solve problems, but in the end anger is the one emotion always readily available for me.[Sigh...]

[Ugh] I'm getting bent out of shape again...back to music!

If nothing else...I will survive.

To: SSJHSMH-U are light and my heart and strength. I will protect you in this life or the next always.