Rachel W
03-10-13, 00:56
Hello,
I started with worrying about my vision back in 2008 when a doctor said he saw something that could be early AMD and I already had some distorted vision. Despite going to a retina specialist who said my retinas were 100% healthy, I thought that maybe the dots were there and they just forgot to mention them as they weren't bad enough to be disease causing and I continued to worry and it led to worries about MS (as they said the distortion must be neurological). This then led to ALS fears as i started twitching and it just got out of hand.
Anyway, I became hyper aware of my vision, but there didn't seem to be any changes and I was very busy with graduate studies.
I got into a really bad habit as I have OCD and the only time I could use my computer was either when I first woke up and was in my bedroom or after my shower late, so I would often spend until 5am on the computer which for some reason i could be the most productive. This was in 2009/2010. The I returned to the US (I was in the UK) and did my field research and then had two major write-ups in 2011/12 when I graduated. Since then I have been unable to work due to my OCD and have just stayed in the habit of sleeping 4am-12pm. I work at home as much as I can and do graphic design work and I also find that video games relax me.
In 2010 I was sick in terms of vomiting and a few days later I noticed a lot of floaters, then because I freaked out about my vision again I noticed other phenomena, such as little glowing spots that stay a few seconds (up to 30 secs) and then disappear, and also little black specs that also come and go.
Back in 2011 or so I realised my night vision was blotchy and realised it was like a visual snow but without movement. In 2012 I also realised that sometimes if it was cloudy and dull outside I would think it was drizzling outside, but it wasn't. I only noticed this a few times though and never gave it a second thought thinking I was just tired. In 2012 I also noticed if I looked at a gravel road there seemed to be shimmering movement in the peripheral vision. I also have quite persistent after images.
A couple of months ago I got a glowing spot that lasted about 20 minutes, but it eventually faded, then last month I got another and this one did not fade and it was actually a small blind spot. Despite not having health insurance I ended up going to the ER the next day just in case. The doctor looked in my eyes and said the retinas looked healthy but I should see an ophthamologist on the Monday (it was Saturday). I did so and he believed it was a king of migraine aura that had lasted too long and caused lasting damage (sort of like a mini-stroke in that a blood vessel had closed off and not reopened). I had had three more appear just that morning (but they don't seem to have lasted and the first one only glows very rarely but is still a minute blind spot. He told me it may be stress related and that I should just try to relax and not worry about it but maybe see a neuro-ophthamologist in a few months if it keeps happening.
Luckily, although I have discovered older areas which are also tiny blind spots there are very few and I have had not new ones (although I still get the transient spots quite often).
The issue now is I am paranoid about my computer use. It is my work, but also my way of relaxing. I have been good though and only spending the evening on the computer and have even been trying to turn it off before am and read on a kindle (which is not a glowing screen but actual ink) before bed. I often go to bed before 2:30am as well although I still get up 11:30 or so.
The issue is I don't play video games too often but there is a big one coming out and I have been lucky enough to be beta testing. This means that i play for a weekend and I played two weeks ago for about 8 hours a day (late). It is a very muted game in that it is natural browns/greys/greens and is quite calming on the eyes, but as I have been once again worrying about my sight I noticed my vision got a but strained so I thought to myself "I hope this isn't going to make my visual snow worse" (I had been reading about it maybe being related to my other symptoms). After the weekend when I was also stressed as usual, I tried to see if I could see the snow in the day (maybe I had noticed it a little more after playing but this would have been in a darker room anyway), Well, after looking for it I started to see it in the day and it looked like drizzle like it had in the past, but now I see it I can't unsee it and I see it on pretty much everything.
There is nothing to say that video games can cause visual snow and I played the game two weekends before without worrying and also I play a similar game too and have done for hours on end in the past without an issue. This time I had actually thought the worry out to myself and I wonder whether I have made myself see it more because of the direct worry. I am so scared that it is going to stay and even get worse, especially as I see it while even using the computer.
The last four years, during these issues my stress has been much higher than normal. I have had OCD for years and this is stressful, but I also had stress from my graduate studies, physical stress from not exercising as much and not working out of the house, but at a computer and also my OCD and its related anxiety have been constant with little reprieve.
I am sorry this is so long, but I want to know if anyone has had any of these symptoms, especially VS and if so, has it actually gone away, or have I doomed myself to a lifetime of this.
I know I need to spend less time on the computer and actually have, but the games are my stress reduction and outlet and when the game comes out I will be playing it a lot as it is competitive and this is the first opportunity I have had to be in at the beginning of a game, with a group of other enthusiasts. Even if the computer can't make VS worse, I fear my worry that it can would.
I plan on buying computer glasses which I supposed to reduce eye strain, try to play earlier and get to a pretty normal sleep cycle and I am going to take some more vitamins (including Inositol for anxiety, magnesium, B vitamins, CoQ 10 and also ginkgo for increasing circulation).
Please if anyone can give me hope I would very much appreciate it.
:)
I started with worrying about my vision back in 2008 when a doctor said he saw something that could be early AMD and I already had some distorted vision. Despite going to a retina specialist who said my retinas were 100% healthy, I thought that maybe the dots were there and they just forgot to mention them as they weren't bad enough to be disease causing and I continued to worry and it led to worries about MS (as they said the distortion must be neurological). This then led to ALS fears as i started twitching and it just got out of hand.
Anyway, I became hyper aware of my vision, but there didn't seem to be any changes and I was very busy with graduate studies.
I got into a really bad habit as I have OCD and the only time I could use my computer was either when I first woke up and was in my bedroom or after my shower late, so I would often spend until 5am on the computer which for some reason i could be the most productive. This was in 2009/2010. The I returned to the US (I was in the UK) and did my field research and then had two major write-ups in 2011/12 when I graduated. Since then I have been unable to work due to my OCD and have just stayed in the habit of sleeping 4am-12pm. I work at home as much as I can and do graphic design work and I also find that video games relax me.
In 2010 I was sick in terms of vomiting and a few days later I noticed a lot of floaters, then because I freaked out about my vision again I noticed other phenomena, such as little glowing spots that stay a few seconds (up to 30 secs) and then disappear, and also little black specs that also come and go.
Back in 2011 or so I realised my night vision was blotchy and realised it was like a visual snow but without movement. In 2012 I also realised that sometimes if it was cloudy and dull outside I would think it was drizzling outside, but it wasn't. I only noticed this a few times though and never gave it a second thought thinking I was just tired. In 2012 I also noticed if I looked at a gravel road there seemed to be shimmering movement in the peripheral vision. I also have quite persistent after images.
A couple of months ago I got a glowing spot that lasted about 20 minutes, but it eventually faded, then last month I got another and this one did not fade and it was actually a small blind spot. Despite not having health insurance I ended up going to the ER the next day just in case. The doctor looked in my eyes and said the retinas looked healthy but I should see an ophthamologist on the Monday (it was Saturday). I did so and he believed it was a king of migraine aura that had lasted too long and caused lasting damage (sort of like a mini-stroke in that a blood vessel had closed off and not reopened). I had had three more appear just that morning (but they don't seem to have lasted and the first one only glows very rarely but is still a minute blind spot. He told me it may be stress related and that I should just try to relax and not worry about it but maybe see a neuro-ophthamologist in a few months if it keeps happening.
Luckily, although I have discovered older areas which are also tiny blind spots there are very few and I have had not new ones (although I still get the transient spots quite often).
The issue now is I am paranoid about my computer use. It is my work, but also my way of relaxing. I have been good though and only spending the evening on the computer and have even been trying to turn it off before am and read on a kindle (which is not a glowing screen but actual ink) before bed. I often go to bed before 2:30am as well although I still get up 11:30 or so.
The issue is I don't play video games too often but there is a big one coming out and I have been lucky enough to be beta testing. This means that i play for a weekend and I played two weeks ago for about 8 hours a day (late). It is a very muted game in that it is natural browns/greys/greens and is quite calming on the eyes, but as I have been once again worrying about my sight I noticed my vision got a but strained so I thought to myself "I hope this isn't going to make my visual snow worse" (I had been reading about it maybe being related to my other symptoms). After the weekend when I was also stressed as usual, I tried to see if I could see the snow in the day (maybe I had noticed it a little more after playing but this would have been in a darker room anyway), Well, after looking for it I started to see it in the day and it looked like drizzle like it had in the past, but now I see it I can't unsee it and I see it on pretty much everything.
There is nothing to say that video games can cause visual snow and I played the game two weekends before without worrying and also I play a similar game too and have done for hours on end in the past without an issue. This time I had actually thought the worry out to myself and I wonder whether I have made myself see it more because of the direct worry. I am so scared that it is going to stay and even get worse, especially as I see it while even using the computer.
The last four years, during these issues my stress has been much higher than normal. I have had OCD for years and this is stressful, but I also had stress from my graduate studies, physical stress from not exercising as much and not working out of the house, but at a computer and also my OCD and its related anxiety have been constant with little reprieve.
I am sorry this is so long, but I want to know if anyone has had any of these symptoms, especially VS and if so, has it actually gone away, or have I doomed myself to a lifetime of this.
I know I need to spend less time on the computer and actually have, but the games are my stress reduction and outlet and when the game comes out I will be playing it a lot as it is competitive and this is the first opportunity I have had to be in at the beginning of a game, with a group of other enthusiasts. Even if the computer can't make VS worse, I fear my worry that it can would.
I plan on buying computer glasses which I supposed to reduce eye strain, try to play earlier and get to a pretty normal sleep cycle and I am going to take some more vitamins (including Inositol for anxiety, magnesium, B vitamins, CoQ 10 and also ginkgo for increasing circulation).
Please if anyone can give me hope I would very much appreciate it.
:)