I know this has nothing to do with anxiety

[I'mdave27]

I purchased a bible in a year by the soul survivor group. It starts off on September 1st so obviously I'm a late but does it matter if I start reading it now or should I wait till next year ?

[Annie0904]

I am sure it is fine to start reading it now. You could start at September 1st and read more to catch up.

[I'mdave27]

Will it open my eyes to a new world ? I've always been suspicious when people read the bible and claim it changed their life forever. I've just watched a youtube video one person left a comment 'jesus will causes more damage upon the non believer's' doesn't sound too appealing

[hanshan]

This is not a forum for discussing religion (much as I would like to).

[Rennie1989]

We can't answer that for you, people perceive and have different beliefs and expectations of religions.

[I'mdave27]

I was in waterstones looking at the shelves and I picked out the satanic bible. Every little bit I read made so much sense

[NoPoet]

Are your questions genuine?

If they are, Jesus didn't cause any damage - it seems rather cretinous that someone would suggest that his attempts to comfort, uplift and improve others were somehow responsible for the Crusades which occurred a thousand years after he died. Perhaps if less people blamed Jesus and more people blamed those who actually start wars, people would be less inclined to mock religion.

[I'mdave27]

Yes they are genuine

[NoPoet]

Ok, in that case I can see from your posts that you are asking for reassurance about reading the Bible - you're basically asking our permission to do so. You seem quick to notice things and quick to ask questions from your other posts on NMP, but you may be equally quick to jump to conclusions, or take impulsive action - for example jumping between which religion you'd like to be part of.

Part of your recovery from OCD and anxiety-related problems will come if you can slow yourself down a bit, take some time to consider the pros and cons before making important commitments. You don't just sign up to a religion and immediately find a meaning to your life. We find our own meaning in the things we do, the places we go and the people we love. It's something we earn as we move forward through life. You need to understand and respect the teachings of your chosen faith in order to honour God and the other people who also follow the same faith. This isn't a five-minute job, it is something that makes more sense to you as you discover more about it; it's a journey.

Satanism is apparently mis-represented (to an extent) as vile and cruel, but you would need to have a lot of self-esteem as a Satanist is likely to encounter a lot of opposition from Christian and Muslim people in particular. It seems to be the religion of the lonely, the bitter and the angry, so remember you will also be seen like this and it will certainly not help you build a social life.

In another thread you say that you're on citalopram and mirtazapine but find yourself extremely tired. I was briefly on 40mg of citalopram in 2009 and found it completely drained me of energy and I couldn't function. 40mg has since become the highest dose, so consider very gradually coming down to 30mg under your doctor's advice as you might find it a bit less sedating but still a high enough dose to help.

Mirtazapine is the opposite: the lower the dose, the more sedating it is, and 15mg is the lowest dose normally prescribed (I think).

So a high dose of cit and a low dose of mirt are really going to sap your strength - this isn't harmful, but you are doing really well to be able to go for walks and stuff, so you're probably already stronger than you think.

[I'mdave27]

But if my mind and body are set to do the same things day in , day out surely I'm going to question things ? I'm on constant alert which is why I find it hard to sleep and I'm on 15mg mirtazapine sooo crazy but oh well

[I'mdave27]

I refuse to believe or accept that satanism is for people who are angry , bitter and sad and it is not satanists who are the same. Have you seen people that go into churches ? Most of them are stuck up snobs who outside that church wouldn't even give you the time of day , not all of them though. Satanism to me means not believing in the devil or god it just means me being me , if that makes sense. I'm tired of feeling guilty for every sin I commit because I'm hurting the lord but yet the lord allows so much pain in the world....

[Rennie1989]

Don't generalise that most church-goer are stuck up snobs. Have you met all of them to come up with that conclusion?

Satanism has more to it then popular belief. You believe in God and Satan, but it's not a dark religion that people perceive it to be.

I used to be religious once and, like you, I felt guilty of the sins I committed. But somebody taught me that as long as you are sorry for the sins you committed then God will forgive you, as long as you don't do it again. Still feeling sore about those sins means that you haven't truly forgiven yourself for them. My conclusion now is that we are human beings, we all make mistakes, that's how we learn and grow.