Can anyone help me?

[LittleLaura]

Hello! My name is Laura, I'm 18 and I am really just wanting some advice.

I've never been diagnosed with a anxiety disorder, so I don't know if I'm still allowed to join the forum, but I wanted to give it a shot anyway. I'm really worried and I just wanted to talk to people who knew how I felt, and point me in the direction of getting some help.

For the past two years or so I've suspected I have some sort of health anxiety as I often find myself worrying over my health (usually my heart) which leads to what I think is a panic attack. My heart beats really fast, I struggle to breathe, I shake and cry out of fear, I often feel light headed and have a general feeling that I'm going to die. This normally makes me think I'm having a heart attack, which makes me freak out more. My family usually tell me I'm being silly (It usually happens during the night, and as I am alone I get more anxious) and they get irritated if wake them up. I appreciate being worried about your health isn't uncommon these days, especially when it is so easy to search for symptoms and get scary results, but I feel like I focus on it more than I should. I am healthy, so theres no real reason for me to feel this way, but I can't get rid of the feeling that something's not quite right with me.

However, recently my panic attacks seem to be triggered over nothing, and come out of nowhere. After a particularly bad panic attack last weekend (which lead my boyfriend to walk me around the streets in the early hours of the morning so I could get some fresh air), it took a few days to recover, and lead to a second attack on the bus on my way to work.

I don't really know what to do, and my friends and family constantly laugh at my health worries, which makes me feel even worse about the whole thing. I know I'm being silly after a few days, but when I'm having a panic attack, I literally feel as though I am about to die and I am terrified. It hurts that they don't understand how scary this is for me.

Thank you for taking your time to read this, I'm sorry if I have misdiagnosed myself (as I often do). I would appreciate any help or advice, as I am becoming increasingly worried about these attacks.

Laura
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[Daisy Sue]

Hi Laura, welcome to the forum. Of course you're allowed to join! :)

It does sound to me exactly like typical panic attacks, and they really are scary, especially if you're not really sure what's happening to you. But try not to worry, they can't hurt you - it's just over-reactions going on in our bodies, and they're fuelled by fear, so the more you can consciously calm and reassure yourself mentally, the less severe they will be.

There's a lot of info in this forum about panic attacks, try and find something either here or elsewhere on the net about exactly what happens during a panic attack. Once you've seen it written in black & white, seen the simple and believable explanation for why we feel what we do, it really does help understand what's going on, and in turn that gives reassurance.

I'm sorry you don't have the understanding of your family, but your boyfriend sounds amazing and very supportive. Maybe you should go have a chat with your GP - your family might rally round more if they hear a definite diagnosis.

[LittleLaura]

Thank you so much for your reply and advice, I was worried that no one would see my post. I've been looking around the site and I can definitely relate to the information about health anxiety/panic attacks. I feel a lot better just knowing that I'm not alone and what I am going through does not make me crazy. I'm considering going to my GP now, just for piece of mind that theres nothing actually wrong with me, and to diagnose the attacks.

Thanks again for your help,
Laura
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[Annie0904]

Hi Laura. Daisy Sue has given you really good advise so I just want to say hi and welcome. I am sure you will get lots of support here x

[Wombat Overlord]

Hi Laura, sorry to hear about your recent bout with anxiety and panic attacks. Coming from a relatable standpoint, I can honestly say that I have experienced all the symptoms you talked about at least once over the course of my battle with anxiety. I used to think the same thing about my heart, which lead to 4-5 ER visits over a 3 month period (without health insurance) and multiple EKG's. Obviously I was fine, and I'm sure you are as well, but that assurance doesn't always make it seem less real. You need to constantly remind yourself that you are 18, and the chance of someone at your stage in life getting a heart attack is extremely unlikely. The breathing issues can be tough to handle, and I am currently experiencing a lot of trouble getting a grip on that issue as well. Once again though, just remember that even though it may feel like it, the chance that your throat will close up or that your lung will collapse (or something similar) are practically nonexistent. I've been drinking a lot of tea lately, specifically the Sleepytime Throat Tamer brand, which always helps calm down my breathing issues. I can also sympathize with you on the issue of your parents not treating your condition as anything more than spastic worry. Surrounding yourself with people who can recognize your problem and not perpetuate it is vital to overcoming it, because as I'm sure you know, there's nothing worse than someone yelling "Calm down" or "I can't believe you're doing this again" in the midst of a panic attack (quotes courtesy of my mother, haha!). It's great that your boyfriend is as understanding as he is, but there has to be a way to get your parents on board as well. In terms of overcoming the anxiety, it may be a lengthy process, but at least your are at the stage in which you have addressed that there is an issue causing you all this misery, and now you just need to carefully eliminate the underlying issues that originally spawned the anxiety. It's great that you found this site, and you should spend some time in the chat room as it always helps me calm down and realize that I'm not alone. Just remember, you aren't going to have a heart attack, stop breathing, develop cancer, or undergo any similar experience at your age! I hope at least some of this was helpful, and hopefully I'll see you around the chat from time to time!

-Alecks

[LittleLaura]

Wow, I'm really touched by all the support Ive got, and I haven't been a member for a whole day yet! I'm so glad I found this forum.

I know that I am healthy and I have no real health issues, but when I start to panic its all too easy to forget that I am ok. Thank you for sharing your experiences with me, I really can't explain how appreciative I am. I look forward to speaking with you all soon.

Laura
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[dancingfrog]

Hi Laura and welcome, you will get lots of support and help from us all here. I can completely empathise with you as most others on here will. We are all her yo chat, you can pm anytime if your worried or panicky. I also understand about the difficulties you face when having family members laugh, those who know my problems find it funny at times and as a child I was ridiculed by my younger sister when having panick attacks. She still finds it funny to mimick my panic episodes as a child. No it has recently become more serious she is more understanding after all she was a child at the time. It's often very hard for others who generally are worry free to comprehend what is happening to there loved one, and sometimes genuine concern can morph into Micky take and humour.

So I hope you will soon start feeling better no you have hundreds of friends to add to your list.

Hugs :hugs:

Dancing frog xx

---------- Post added at 21:29 ---------- Previous post was at 21:24 ----------

All the no's are NOW

---------- Post added at 21:30 ---------- Previous post was at 21:29 ----------

All the no's are NOW

[LittleLaura]

Thank you, its really reassuring to know that help is only a click away if I ever need it.

My family don't take it seriously at all, laugh at me all the time, and talk about it in front of other people, and make it one huge joke. My Dad doesn't know about my problems (my parents divorced during my GCSE's and doesn't live with us. I haven't told him as I don't want to worry him), but my Mum and older sister do. Mostly they get angry with me, (as I mentioned my attacks usually happen during the night, and they get annoyed that I'm disturbing their sleep) so for the most part I've been dealing with it alone, often meaning I've had nights with not much sleep as I was too worked up/afraid to go to sleep. The only thing I've found to help is to listen to music, and focus on the lyrics rather than my thoughts, which isn't always practical.

My boyfriend has been helping me as much as he can, but he can only really give me support. He hadn't ever seen how bad I get during an attack until the other weekend. It made a huge difference for just having someone there who wasn't calling my pathetic, or telling me to go back to bed.

I'm sure I will start to feel better soon, now I can talk openly about it with people who understand, and start trying to move forwards

Laura
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[Saoirse]

Hi Laura, if your panic attacks continue, get worse or more frequent, don't be afraid to see your GP. I have had just one panic attack & it was a scary experience. Stress to your folks how seriously this effect is having on you and see that you get your mum's support. Consider talking to your dad &/or a trusted relative who maybe able to help you and seek your mum's support.

Hang in there and know that your forum friends are with you and bahind you all the way. Good luck!

[LittleLaura]

Thank you, I am considering visiting my GP, just so I know for definite what is going on. I have had a conversation with my mum, but I guess she doesn't realise I can't control it, I can't stop myself from having an attack, I just have to wait until its over. I may talk to my Dad once I've seen the GP, but as I said I don't want to worry him. I don't have any other relatives I'm close to, so I have to reply on my friends/boyfriend.

I appreciate the support so much!

[Mistabig2006]

I find that when I'm having an anxiety attack at home that a distraction like listening to music or reading seems to take the edge off. It's not always practical as family can often make things worse without meaning to be malicious. Going for a shower or bath can also help take your mind off things but there's no substitute for getting support from a friend or family member. My wife had been suffering from severe panic attacks for years and would call me just for a chat to take her mind off what was going on. I couldn't understand it fully until I found myself having them also.

The advice I used to give her was the same as I posted above, after a while she found ways of managing her attacks by listening to her mp3 player when out and about, removing herself from the situation which caused the attack when out and about, but the key to gaining control was to keep pushing herself to face her fear.

I made the mistake of hiding from my issues and now face a hell of a climb to get myself out of the hole I dug for myself.

[LittleLaura]

Thank you for advice. The problem is that I only have panic attacks at night/VERY early morning. It is only recently that they've happened through the day (only on buses, too) so I'm limited to what I can do to calm down. I'm also constantly watching the time, knowing I have to be up early in the morning for work, which I guess doesn't help me when I'm already feeling stressed.

Music works because it doesn't really disturb anyone (I have a speaker pillow which is really helpful) but it also does take quite a while for me to start to feel like I'm calming down.

I've tried to hide away from it for a while, what with constantly being told I'm overreacting, being stupid, attention seeking etc...but I know that the first step to getting help (and it applies to pretty much anything, really) is admitting to yourself that you have a problem/something you can't deal with alone. It won't apply for everyone, but its always worked for me, hence I have found myself here.

Laura
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