New job offer - Unsure

[Down_Lo]

Hi guys,

I have been looking for a new job to escape my current place (alcatraz!) and have been offered a new role but im unsure whether to take it or not with my anxiety being quite bad just now.

I change my mind by the hour and its D-Day today, I dont want to keep one end waiting basically. I am worried that having to settle in to a new place with new people etc will make me worse just now.

I have tried to weigh all the cons and pros to either end and they are quite close when comparing them tbh. Money and progression is better in the other role although this place is closer travelling, less hours and I tuck myself away just now and work away even though there is quite a negative atmosphere.

Dont get me wrong I was alot more confident before starting in here and over the last 3 years I have slowly lost confidence, self esteem and getting more anxious, I dont know if im being defeatest or being sensible that I should maybe build confidence etc before starting a new place?

Im worried I start in there and dont fit in or getting panic attacks and make a fool of myself. The new social aspect of it as well like having to sit with people, ask questions and go through the training etc im not sure whether il rise to it or feel overwhelmed?

I had another interview and felt more confortable with the place although I got word back that i was unsuccessful for that position which was a bit of a set back but cant dwell on it now.

Not looking for sympathy or a straight yes or no but just some advice and if any of you have made the jump to another place?

Cheers guys

[OwenF]

I made a move whilst suffering and it kicked in big time on the first day in the new place.

Everyone is differeint - who is to say that the new job isnt a chance to refresh yourself and be a new you.

Give yourself a couple of weeks break between jobs if you can.

[ankietyjoe]

One of the most effective ways of dealing with anxiety is pushing boundaries.

It's going to be there whether you move jobs or not, so it might as well be what you want to do rather than what you think you might not be able to do.

[Edie]

They normally say you shouldn't make big decisions when you're going through a bad patch, but if your current job is causing the bad patch then leaving might be a very good idea. Yes, it will be hard settling in to a new role with new people, but if you're really unhappy then it may be better to do this now, rather than wait until you're worn down so much you couldn't manage it.

You obviously applied for the new job for a reason. Think about whether that reason was a valid one or not. Could you realistically re-build your confidence while you're in your current job? Pros and cons are not all about wages and travelling times, be sure to include the emotional impacts as well.

Good luck with your decision, and I hope you will be happy with whatever you decide.

[Down_Lo]

Hi guys,

Thanks for the advice, thats the things that have been going round in my mind, dont want to move while im pretty low but at the same time its the needless negative crap and stress that goes on in here thats got me to where i am now!

I do want to leave and find a new place and the other place seems friendly enough and a good chance for me to progress although there is more responsability that may push me to the edge, the thought of the 'honeymoon' period of the job i dont think i would like tbh, having to get my bearings, shadow new people and learn new things while trying to keep myself calm and not take a panic attack and make an idiot of myself.

Its annoying as I feel that if i was back to the old me then this would have been a great opportunity to progress forward and wouldnt have though twice about it!

I might hold off a bit with the job searching now I have kind of realised that Im unsure if I can actually leave here just now, feel trapped but I do need to work on my confidence and motivation as well as my social skills to feel confident enough in myself to be able to leave.

What keeps me from turning the other job down is that I cant wait till the day I can walk in here and hand my notice in and tell my boss I'm going! Would be like winning the lottery! :)

---------- Post added at 14:36 ---------- Previous post was at 14:32 ----------


I made a move whilst suffering and it kicked in big time on the first day in the new place.

Everyone is differeint - who is to say that the new job isnt a chance to refresh yourself and be a new you.

Give yourself a couple of weeks break between jobs if you can.

How did you get on after your first day? Think thats what the fear is the most is the first day/week trying to settle in and keep calm!

I was a mess going for the double interview then was asked to come in and meet everyone as i was unsure about the position which was even worse, felt my heart pounding and had a flush face for about an hour then calmed down a bit but wasnt the best experience of my life! :)

I didnt get to meet the team i would be in because they had been out for lunch at the time so thats another negative as it would have been good to gauge how they were as well!

[Speranza]

I jumped from Alcatraz to what I thought was my dream job - and it was until new people took over. Now it is more hellish than the old one - but I shall escape this one too. I STILL don't regret leaving the other. It is your decision. Personally I would rather go somewhere new in hope than go somewhere I KNEW would be negative, but that's how I roll. If this new one was a stepping stone instead of 'the next twenty years' would that make it easier to contemplate?

[Down_Lo]

I jumped from Alcatraz to what I thought was my dream job - and it was until new people took over. Now it is more hellish than the old one - but I shall escape this one too. I STILL don't regret leaving the other. It is your decision. Personally I would rather go somewhere new in hope than go somewhere I KNEW would be negative, but that's how I roll. If this new one was a stepping stone instead of 'the next twenty years' would that make it easier to contemplate?


I wish I could still 'roll' like that! :) Class. haha

Thats what my mum and co said, it doesnt have to be forever in the new place but my biggest worry is that it ends up worse than in here especially with me being quite low just now! Its hard enough coming in here just now and if the other place was worse i dont know how i would cope!

Trying not to be negative more realistic or the 'possible' negatives I suppose, the worst thing would be jumping from the frying pan into the fire.

Its easier said than done with my line of work just now to jump from one job to another!

The problem is I get on well with the two guys in my office its the people running the place thats the problem! They put uneeded pressure on us and try to point out everyones wrongs instead of rights and make everyone feel like they are replacable, basically they are horrible people!

I am currently at night college course for 2 years as well so really that is the key to getting a better job and opening more doors for employment.