Opinions please

[rebeccad]

Hi everyone, so I went the see my new therapist organised through my work and because I don't pay I don't get a choice who I see, they have given me a man and I find it very hard to open up to a man because I just don't think they get it , women are more sympathetic to fellow females and I can imagine him rolling his eyes whilst I'm telling him, I had something very personal happen to me when I was 8 and he's asked me of anything triggers my health anxiety and I said I can't pinpoint it when really I can , it's just because he's a male I don't think I can talk about personal things like that, what's everyone else's opinions has anybody had any good experiences with male therapists ? X

[cpe1978]

I have only ever had female therapists.......but - I am a man, and can honestly say that just by virtue of being male, i wouldnt be more likely to be dismissive.

[Ally-SA]

I've always gotten along more with males than females - in general.

He's a professional - so I wouldn't worry too much? Give him a chance, and be honest. You might be surprised...

:)

[almamatters]

I had brilliant results with a male CBT therapist years ago, in fact I got on much better with him than I did the female therapist I saw previously. I don't think gender matters a great deal myself, but that's just my experience.

[Fishmanpa]

I've seen both men and women concerning therapy and found no discernible difference. You don't want sympathetic regardless of gender. You want up front brutal honesty in my opinion. It's not about sparing your feelings, it's about fixing what's wrong with them.

Good Luck!

[rebeccad]

Thanks, I think it's because my husband is not very sympathetic (to put it very mildly ) I expect the same from all males but I mean I can't talk about personal things it's very embarassing x

[almamatters]

My husband is very unsympathetic! so I know what you mean, to be honest I don't think there is a great deal therapists have not heard and they hear very personal things all the time, so I would try and not be too embarrassed. I found it hard to open up on my first appointment about a couple of things but I soon settled down and was fine after that. Good luck . x

[Fishmanpa]

Thanks, I think it's because my husband is not very sympathetic (to put it very mildly ) I expect the same from all males but I mean I can't talk about personal things it's very embarassing x

That makes sense but at the same time, many women have male GYNs... Talk about being "exposed"! I had a woman Dr. examine my "parts" and I have to admit it was a little unsettling at first (it didn't help she was attractive), but when you're sick, all that matters is feeling better so I got over it quickly.

Maybe when you realize he's helping, it'll get easier.

Good Luck!

[rebeccad]

Thanks all, I'm going again next week will try really hard to over come it, I worry about stupid things!! Alan matters I had to read your thread twice then realised your a lady lol , also I'm 33 and think he prob thinks I'm very immature as i told him I have a very bad phobia of losing my mom I'm so very still attached to her , I'm an only child so we are very close x

[almamatters]

Thanks all, I'm going again next week will try really hard to over come it, I worry about stupid things!! Alan matters I had to read your thread twice then realised your a lady lol , also I'm 33 and think he prob thinks I'm very immature as i told him I have a very bad phobia of losing my mom I'm so very still attached to her , I'm an only child so we are very close x

Lol! Yep it's Alma, pretty sure I'm a lady anyway. :)

[rebeccad]

Oh yes alma lmao I thought it said Alan matters x

[Fishmanpa]

Oh yes alma lmao I thought it said Alan matters x

I saw that too! And the thumbnail throws you off as well ;)

[Karol.Papis]

Hi Rebecca :) you are obviously at least partly right. Let me explain - men are somewhat less emotional and more rational than women, on average. I am stressing the 'on average' bit as I have seen quite a few people who would contradict the above rule, so it may be worth giving your therapist a chance... However, I believe that if you do not feel comfortable doing just that there is another possible solution: perhaps ask him directly whether you could actually be seen by a female therapist (I think nowadays many services actually give you such a choice in advance of therapy). I believe that it is worth trying to get exactly what you want out of therapy as it is often a personal and positively powerful experience! :D Good luck!

[eastofeden]

I don't feel comfortable opening up emotionally to men either due to certain experiences. im sure you can request a female therapist but in order to be a therapist in the first place he must be a pretty understanding person so don't worry too much. im sure he's beyond the point of being shocked :) x

[almamatters]

I saw that too! And the thumbnail throws you off as well ;)

Thumbnail is Morrissey from The Smiths, though he was just as famous in the US ?? :shrug:

[Fishmanpa]

Thumbnail is Morrissey from The Smiths, though he was just as famous in the US ?? :shrug:

Ohhh, the Smiths are well known as is Morrissey (I'm not a big fan although I do appreciate the music) but I wouldn't be able to pick him out in a crowd ~lol~ Now if it had been any of the Rolling Stones or Beatles, no problem! ;)