EnglishChris
30-10-13, 16:54
Hello there, I have not posted on here for over a year it seems since may 2012.
Background:
I suffered from anxiety which evolved from low self esteem and the fear of embrassement, this caused me to become anti social and not meet new people, so I didnt make new friends nor have a chance to meet someone special. This lead me to being a 31 year old who whilst isnt a virgin may as well be one (in my mind), which only strengthened my low self esteem.
My main symptoms were Depersonalisation and Derealisation, along with a generally anxious mind which caused the simplest things to seem scary.
Since 2012 I have made huge progress in recovering, I moved from my comfort zone of my parents into a shared flat with 2 girls and started to form a social group of friends. The DP/DR left me and anxious thoughts went away for the most part, however I was still always checking to feel if I felt the DP/DR and any anxiety.
2 Weeks ago I woke up to build up to a panic attack, I was in utter shock as this was meant to have been left behind months ago. I did not take it well and was in tears for quite a while after. I realised I was entering a setback period.
Since then my mind has become more anxious, having moments of feeling as if my mind is not working correctly, feeling very depressed, simple things starting to make me feel anxious.
I have identified I believe why I might have been set back, I was in charge of moving the office to new premises so was under quite a bit of stress. I also had stopped pushing myself in terms of trying to break the mental wall of my self esteem and was starting be more pessimistic about my life.
I have since finally told my parents the truth behind my anxiety instead of giving hints, I have rejoined a socialising group that arranges events in Manchester, I have just started volunteering for Anxiety UK and will be on the phonelines once training is complete and I have started to think about pushing myself way out of my comfort zones such as speed dating etc (not done it yet).
So after that wonderful novel I wanted to ask is a set back after a year normal? I am struggling to get back into the mind set of using CBT, should I have never stopped? Even after pushing myself back into pushing myself I feel as if the anxiety is regaining its control on me and the symptoms getting stronger, is this to be expected?
The symptoms dont scare me as they did, but I am starting to feel a bit distressed by them and feeling more despair, which I know is expected of a set back but I find it hard to move beyond them.
Sorry for the wall of text, felt a fuller story might help you help me so to speak.
Background:
I suffered from anxiety which evolved from low self esteem and the fear of embrassement, this caused me to become anti social and not meet new people, so I didnt make new friends nor have a chance to meet someone special. This lead me to being a 31 year old who whilst isnt a virgin may as well be one (in my mind), which only strengthened my low self esteem.
My main symptoms were Depersonalisation and Derealisation, along with a generally anxious mind which caused the simplest things to seem scary.
Since 2012 I have made huge progress in recovering, I moved from my comfort zone of my parents into a shared flat with 2 girls and started to form a social group of friends. The DP/DR left me and anxious thoughts went away for the most part, however I was still always checking to feel if I felt the DP/DR and any anxiety.
2 Weeks ago I woke up to build up to a panic attack, I was in utter shock as this was meant to have been left behind months ago. I did not take it well and was in tears for quite a while after. I realised I was entering a setback period.
Since then my mind has become more anxious, having moments of feeling as if my mind is not working correctly, feeling very depressed, simple things starting to make me feel anxious.
I have identified I believe why I might have been set back, I was in charge of moving the office to new premises so was under quite a bit of stress. I also had stopped pushing myself in terms of trying to break the mental wall of my self esteem and was starting be more pessimistic about my life.
I have since finally told my parents the truth behind my anxiety instead of giving hints, I have rejoined a socialising group that arranges events in Manchester, I have just started volunteering for Anxiety UK and will be on the phonelines once training is complete and I have started to think about pushing myself way out of my comfort zones such as speed dating etc (not done it yet).
So after that wonderful novel I wanted to ask is a set back after a year normal? I am struggling to get back into the mind set of using CBT, should I have never stopped? Even after pushing myself back into pushing myself I feel as if the anxiety is regaining its control on me and the symptoms getting stronger, is this to be expected?
The symptoms dont scare me as they did, but I am starting to feel a bit distressed by them and feeling more despair, which I know is expected of a set back but I find it hard to move beyond them.
Sorry for the wall of text, felt a fuller story might help you help me so to speak.