Anyone else got a gratification issue?

[GirlAfraid23]

Mine is specifically with Facebook.
I know it's sad and it's not the be all and end all of life but when I post something, be it a photo or status, I get a bit concerned when nobody "likes" or comments it.
Even my own friends.

Then I see other people do the same thing and get lots of likes and comments and it's the whole insecurity issue all over again. Something I have battled with for years. So frustrating.

[SarahH]

I find Facebook very depressing.............so I dont go anywhere near it anymore.

[theharvestmouse]

Yet again Facebook causing people problems, just delete your profile, it's actually a lot better to not be on it, why follow the crowd? It's a complete waste of time anyway.

[GirlAfraid23]

I would delete it but it's the way I keep in touch with family and friends I don't see often anymore.

I just don't understand why people ignore things I put up then someone else changes a profile picture and gets 22 likes.

I don't need that many of course but still. It's weird.

I definitely have insecurity issues though.

[Broken-doll]

It's really not important "who" likes your statuses and pictures , it's important that you like yourself. These social networking sites take up far too much of people's time.

[theharvestmouse]

I can see why it causes problems for people, I just think that it's not healthy at all and actually devalues the meaning of a true friendship. It's too easy to click a thumbs up button or click like, it means nothing really. To sit down and write someone a letter or pick up the phone and speak to someone means so much more. I can understand why some people use social networking to keep in touch but is life really better with it? I very much doubt it.

[Broken-doll]

I agree with you harvest mouse, I find the problems with social networking sites is... We use them so much and were so addicted to our cyber life's that we don't actually communicate with friends anymore in the way we should. We accumulate all these virtual friends who we don't personally know and we spend less and less time talking to our real friends. Like you say writing a letter, or speaking to a friend on the phone or meeting up with a friend face to face is so much more beneficial.
All this "likes" jumbo jumbo, it's like a popularity contest...and it's not healthy for the mind. X

[GirlAfraid23]

I see where you are coming from, it would just be weird if I deleted my account as that's how we plan a lot of things etc.

I might just stop putting pics etc up now.

[Broken-doll]

Don't delete your account, that's a little extreme, just stop posting things purely in the hope of receiving attention, that way you're not setting yourself up for a fall. I'm sure you've got all your real friends numbers in your phone. Text them or call them, it's them you need right now, not random Facebook acquaintances.... Who really cares who had bangers and mash for tea? Or who looks hot in a sexy devils outfit?? It's all irrelevant babe xx

[debs71]

I have a love/hate relationship with FB.

To be honest, my basic view on it is it is a load of utter fakery and pretention.

That TV ad about Facebook recently - how people are always way more 'glamorous, exciting and cool' on FB than they are in reality is so very, very true. Bottom line is that people like to show off on FB, showing everyone what a great life they lead, how good they look in photos (you will never see someone post a horrible, unflattering picture of themselves) or try to make out that they have thousands of 'friends' when they really haven't.

If you try to bear that in mind when it comes to who likes or doesn't comment on things, it does bring things into perspective, as everyone is so tied up in their own profiles and posts, most of the time they just don't care what anyone else posts, and nor should it matter to you if they don't.

I do see where you are coming from though hun. I have felt this myself at times, but I think this feeling is really related to our own self-image and self-esteem rather than how people actually think or feel towards us. I try these days to just forget who comments or likes or doesn't and just post things that have meaning for ME or photos or quotes that I LIKE and if people agree then fine.

If not, sod them! (friends or not)

ln all honesty, I am like you. I basically only use FB to stay in touch with a couple of friends who live abroad (Spain) and far from me (Wales). I find the whole idea of running your life (as many people seem to do these days) through the site ridiculous frankly, and agree that it is far better to have REAL friendships and involvements with REAL people face to face than a million 'FB friends'.

You don't need anyone's likes....you are your own person hun.x:hugs:

[danivsdani]

honestly i don't have a rhyme or reason for liking or not liking someone's post or photo. i don't even ever like my crush's pictures lol. i just scroll through and on days i'm feeling generous i'll click *like* on some people's pictures just to pay them a little compliment. some days i *like* nothing at all and some days i'm just feeling insecure and don't want to creep people out liking their pictures for no reason. my point is don't take it too seriously, love. being online isn't much different from real life. you wouldn't get upset with your friends for not paying you a compliment in person would you? and surely you don't *like* every single one of your friends photos and statuses that would take far too much time!

[blue moon]

I am not on facebook,.do not care if people like me or not,î have more things to worry about.I give it the thumb down.

[Rennie1989]

I will say that Facebook has an annoying tendency to only show 'Top Stories' rather than 'Most Recent' unless you change that setting every time you go on Facebook. So for that reason most updates get missed. I've posted updates that either get a few comments or 'likes' or nothing at all, for that reason.

Also people, like me, do read these statuses and take them into account but don't often leave a comment or like. It's not because we are ignoring people, but it would get a little obsessive if people liked and commented everything.

I would delete Facebook if it weren't for the fact that I have friends and family who don't live nearby and who I don't have numbers or Skype. I mainly use it to chat to people and organise things, because everybody has Facebook and I don't necessarily have their email addresses or numbers.

Social media is a whole different world from real life socialising, and we're all still learning these new social norms.

[Fishmanpa]

In the big picture, it's just a website and it all goes away when you hit the little "x" at the upper right of the window. Alleviating your insecurity and issue with it is also as simple as clicking "delete" and the little "x".

[GirlAfraid23]

In the big picture, it's just a website and it all goes away when you hit the little "x" at the upper right of the window. Alleviating your insecurity and issue with it is also as simple as clicking "delete" and the little "x".

Yes but it's also my friends technically saying they don't care.