Psychotic thoughts? (May spike)

[MrBananas]

Hello everyone,

So I am staying in a hotel for a couple of weeks, in the 10th floor. I have pure o ocd with fear of becoming delusional/psychotic and harming people.

Yesterday (and a bit today), I had bad compulsions of jumping out of the window and killing myself. And while this was going on, I suddenly got a thought "what if I already have done it and I am actually dead?". I have thought this thought 2 times, and I am scared that I actually believe that I am dead. I know that it's not true, but I don't REALLY know if I do, if that makes sense.

So, are these psychotic thoughts? Or just ocd, since I function on a normal level and I can think about it and know that it's not true. I have been to a therapist who has assured me again and again that I am not psychotic, but I don't know :(

[Tufty]

Hello everyone,


Yesterday (and a bit today), I had bad compulsions of jumping out of the window and killing myself. And while this was going on, I suddenly got a thought "what if I already have done it and I am actually dead?". I have thought this thought 2 times, and I am scared that I actually believe that I am dead. I know that it's not true, but I don't REALLY know if I do, if that makes sense.

So, are these psychotic thoughts? Or just ocd, since I function on a normal level and I can think about it and know that it's not true. I have been to a therapist who has assured me again and again that I am not psychotic, but I don't know :(

You sound normal to me, now I'm not saying that thinking about jumping out a window and killing yourself is normal or acceptable but when we are stressed, anxious, depressed these escapism intrusive thoughts are common. You are not psychotic, it may be OCD or just unwanted thoughts from a sensitised mind, try not to give them too much meaning.
Accept that you have these thoughts because you are anxious/depressed and they are just a symptom.
I think everyone has intrusive thoughts, some good, some bad and normally we don't pay them much attention. Try not to worry about them as this will add to your anxiety and stress, think to yourself - oh there's another one of those unwanted thoughts of mine, that's interesting - don't try to work out why, how, stop it or go down the what if route of thinking.
Accept them and carry on as normal and they will subside.

[MrBananas]

Thanks for the answer guys. I guess I am a bit stressed these days, and intrusive thoughts are bad because of that. I just want to point out that I absolutely do not WANT to jump out of the window, it's more of a "what if I lose control" kind of thing. At least it's better today :) thank you for the answers, those are really great tips and I will try to follow them.

[Rubicon]

You should look into mindfulness and mindfulness meditation, i think you could really benefit from the attitude it tries to teach. It just means beleiving e.g 'if i have this weird sensation in x part of my body.. that's ok.. just be aware of it and accept it'

Or 'i'm having a thought which is scaring me' mindfulness teaches us to just accept the thought, without trying to control or stop more coming. There's lots of different meditations etc to try.

Just a suggestion :-)