Kez_miller
04-11-13, 23:27
Hi guys
basically i am wondering if i am being selfish, me and my fiancé moved out from living with each other due to financial reasons and more importantly because i needed to give full care to my grandparents whom have cancer and are in their late 80's.
Now overall our relationship was great and we had no real problems. just the general little bickering the same as any couple out there. now 3 months ago her grandfather who is in his mid 70's had a stroke and is still to this day in hospital undergoing physio to help him mobile again. thing is since we moved out of living with each other the sat 3 months i have seen hardly any of my fiance, maybe an hour here or there, ten minutes elsewhere but very very little. and its killing me. I am down, feel like there is nothing good in my life and with xmas coming up it looks like I'm going to have no1 to spend xmas with. i understand fully that she needs to be with her grandparents (they live around 45 minutes away) but she goes to work as a nurse 12 hours 3-4 days a week and then is with her grandparents nearly all of the rest of the time. i have spoken to her about it but she says she can't do anything about it.
thing is because of all the stress my anxiety is through the roof and she was the only one ever who kept my grounded and calm. i just feel like we are going to fall out of love with each other or become un familiar with each other. I'm terrified of losing her. i don't know whether i have abandonment issues because i was given up by my mother at birth or I'm being selfish. its just i really really miss her and don't wanna lose her. i have contemplated ending the relationship because i just don't see the point as there is a chance she will have to move to her grandparents if her grandad can't regain strength to walk. i don't know i just feel a bit lonely and lost right now, like i my crutch as been removed and i have no one to turn too.
basically i am wondering if i am being selfish, me and my fiancé moved out from living with each other due to financial reasons and more importantly because i needed to give full care to my grandparents whom have cancer and are in their late 80's.
Now overall our relationship was great and we had no real problems. just the general little bickering the same as any couple out there. now 3 months ago her grandfather who is in his mid 70's had a stroke and is still to this day in hospital undergoing physio to help him mobile again. thing is since we moved out of living with each other the sat 3 months i have seen hardly any of my fiance, maybe an hour here or there, ten minutes elsewhere but very very little. and its killing me. I am down, feel like there is nothing good in my life and with xmas coming up it looks like I'm going to have no1 to spend xmas with. i understand fully that she needs to be with her grandparents (they live around 45 minutes away) but she goes to work as a nurse 12 hours 3-4 days a week and then is with her grandparents nearly all of the rest of the time. i have spoken to her about it but she says she can't do anything about it.
thing is because of all the stress my anxiety is through the roof and she was the only one ever who kept my grounded and calm. i just feel like we are going to fall out of love with each other or become un familiar with each other. I'm terrified of losing her. i don't know whether i have abandonment issues because i was given up by my mother at birth or I'm being selfish. its just i really really miss her and don't wanna lose her. i have contemplated ending the relationship because i just don't see the point as there is a chance she will have to move to her grandparents if her grandad can't regain strength to walk. i don't know i just feel a bit lonely and lost right now, like i my crutch as been removed and i have no one to turn too.