oscrazymum
10-11-13, 17:17
My HA has been ok for a while now but recently two colleagues at work were diagnosed with breast cancer. They are young, in their 40s. So, even though I do do breast exams some times, that spurred me into prodding and poking around and guess what.,.i find a lump. Actually I found a few. Some feel painful but the one that I'm worried about isn't painful. It's on top of my rib area and doesn't feel like a rock, but is firm. I went to the GP who scared me by saying 'it's not very dramatic, it's very moveable (which it doesn't feel particularly moveable to me) but worth getting checked out...so I'm in a huge panic. I cry all the time and look at my young children and all I can think about is them losing me. I love them so much. I'm still breastfeeding my daughter (10 months) and imagine that I'll have to stop now that I've got this. I cannot imagine it won't be worst case scenario even though I know that 8/10 lumps turn out to be something else...I just can only imagine that I'll be an unlucky one. I will go to the breast clinic next week to get it checked out and know I'll be even more of a mess by the time I get there. I'm just terrified and all I can think about are the implications of being diagnosed with breast cancer. I'm 37 and keep finding stories on the Internet about women in their 30s getting breast cancer. I'm really skinny so feel lots of lumps but have never been scared about one before. Anyway, I know there's nothing I can do other than wait to get it assessed, I'm just going crazy with fear :( I've also convinced myself it must have spread already as I feel like I can't breathe properly since going to the GP last week!!