View Full Version : Why didn't I get referred?
Hi (again) everyone.
So, I'm still fixated on breast C. I've been reading through all of the posts on here tagged with breast, and I've noticed that pretty much all the women on here, (or the ones I looked at), who've noticed a lump or bump have been referred as a precaution. My doctor is a good doctor, and I have a good relationship with her, but I'm worried at the fact that maybe I should have been referred.
She said she wasn't worried about it and told me why, and told me what lumps do concern her. I asked her what she thinks it could be, and she just said 'nothing, it's just part of your body'.
Since the appointment I've been having ache type feelings, or little pains that come and go sort of around my rib area, or sometimes in the breast. I know I didn't have these pains prior to this new obsession, so I'm trying to rationalise with that. But the pains ARE there, I'm not imagining it. Today I woke up and it feels like I've actually pulled a muscle across my shoulder blades across the middle. I've spoken to my mum about it and she reckons it's because I'm 'holding myself funny'. Which would be a fair comment, because I have been tense, and touching around my ribs and armpits a lot.
I'm really worried. I don't know whether to go back and tell her all of this or not. I worry that she dismisses me because she knows of all of my other 'ailments'. And to be fair, I know if I went back and went on and on about it, she probably would refer me, then I'd be double panicked. In true HA form, the thing that made me book the appointment, which was a little red spot, has gone. But the obsession has well and truly manifested and taken on a whole new set of symptoms.
Does anyone have any words of advice? Or anyone felt the same?
Thanks xx
---------- Post added at 20:36 ---------- Previous post was at 20:34 ----------
Just to add, the little red thing was what made me book the appointment originally. But after prodding and poking I remembered a little metal ball feeling thing I noticed over a year ago, possibly two. That became my bigger concern and the thing I'm worried about not being referred over. x
To be fair, you just said it yourself, LF87...
'I know if I went back and went on and on about it, she probably would refer me, then I'd be double panicked'
..but you wonder why you were not referred??
If she had, it wouldn't have helped then with the thing most worrying you, would it?
From your other recent post about this, you said the doctor saw nothing wrong or sinister. THAT is why she didn't refer you.
You must try to have faith in her, and realise this is your HA screaming at you again, It sounds like you know that anyway.
I do to a point, but I'm also concerned with these pain feelings. I just thought all irregularity things were double checked. I'm worried she didn't even feel it. I'm so angry with myself! I'm really struggling with the urges to self check as well. To the point I refuse to be on my own as much as possible, so that I can't get into a full checking session. I'm driving myself mad. I don't know if this is real or not.x
Any tension in the chest area and/or back can often feel like breast pains. That whole area is very muscular, and it doesn't take much. It sounds less like breast issues and more like tension issues that you describe, as your Mum suggested.
I've had the same kind of pains myself. Badly aching or niggling boobs because of tension and the way I hold myself. I have been diagnosed with a ton of micro cysts in my breast though, so I think time of month also plays a big part too in boob aches. They can pop up when you are close to your next period, but even earlier than that.
Aches and pains around that area can be explained by loads of other things, and certainly not always something sinister. It is just that you need to convince your anxious brain of that, which I know is easier said than done.
Although checking breasts is good, I don;t think that it is helpful with HA as your mind is too focused on locating something, so self-fulfilling, and every lump and bump becomes something bad.
I would try if you can to just take some focus from your body for a while. Watch a DVD, listen to some music, do anything that distracts you. It is hard and takes effort, but you can do it. Anxiety is a pattern and a cycle that just keeps grip, but we do have the power to squash it. You are in control of your mind, not anxiety. Remember that hun.x
That's true. It does feel muscular and I've been doing a lot of laptop stuff the past few days so maybe strained something. But then some of the pains feel like shooting pains. I'm just sick. My boyfriend broke up with me as well and he helped me a lot. Says he can't deal with my health issues. We went away to Turkey at the start of October and I was obsessed with an ulcer I had. Thought it was oral C. I was so concerned I took a photo everyday to see if it was getting any bigger. I didn't drink at all, and hardly ate. In fact I lost 6 pounds. On an all inclusive holiday. Not many manage that! My days just feel so empty now and I have endless hours to ruminate. Just so down. I can't believe I'm allowing this to take over my life. The only thing I look forward to is having a drink with my friends at the weekend. The other 6 days are just constant worrying. Absolute rubbish. Thanks for replying again debs xx
Oh gee hun, can I relate to you!
I have had an on/off, rollercoaster involvement with someone (he would never call it a relationship, so nor will I) over the past 4 years and it has finally came to an end in June. It has affected me greatly, and played a huge role in my anxiety coming back 2 months ago. I think it is very hard to deal with anxiety and these external problems at the same time, like splitting with your boyfriend, and also it then AFFECTS your anxiety and makes things worse.
I can also relate to having too much time to ruminate. That is me to a tee! I stopped nursing in 2009, mostly due to stress and being miserable for a long time at work, and have been working for myself at home, but I have far too much time to sit and worry and get myself in a stew, so I understand totally what you mean.
It is interesting, as though I was really stressed when I was working at the hospital, I never had anxiety or panic when at work as I was just so busy, I didn't have time to dwell on it. Thinking is a nightmare, and over-thinking too easy when we are anxious, and then it makes everything worse. It would be great if we could just turn off our worry switch for a while for a break from it all!
Just know you are not alone, love. x:hugs:
Yep this happened to me I went the docs with a thickening in one breast she wasn't concerned , but I could leave it alone so
I went back and because id been back for a second time she had to refer me , then I panicked as to why she had and then so it had to be bc, obviously it wasn't and all was well , x
I'm sure it's nothing to worry about but I thought if you were concerned you could just ring the breast clinic and ask them for a mammogram. Incidentally, I recently had my routine
mammogram and was in a terrible anxiety state waiting for the results. During this time I had awful breast pains! Mammogram was clear, pains disappeared, now back to my jaw/TMJ problems which was 70% better when I was obsessed with the mammogram. Grrrr this damned HA! X
OK here's my history:
I found a breast lump at 27. I was referred, it was removed, it was benign. A couple of years later I found a cyst. I was referred, it was checked, it was left where it was. Three weeks ago I had a mammogram. I was then sent for secondary screening (which was pretty scary), checked and everything was OK.
In short I have had more boob problems than most, but have not had anything seriously wrong with them.
If it is still bothering you, asked to be referred for an ultrasound. That way you will be able to see whatever it is that you can feel and discuss it with the doctor.
Be warned though, even if you do have a small fibroadenoma (a benign lump) they are likely to leave it where it is so you will have to accept it being "part of you" anyway.
I know its hard but honestly if your Dr was at all concerned then she would refer you. I am 31 and have had numerous breast lumps all have benn benign so far thankfully, I get myself into a right state about my breasts so I no longer check them myself. I go to my Dr every 3-6 months and have her check - although once i did it myself and thought i'd found a lump but she felt it and explained it was just normal breast tissue and that it didn't concern her - it took me a while to take that in and believe her but with the help of people on here I began to realize that if my Dr had any doubt she would have made a referral. If you've read quite a lot of the posts about breast lumps on here you've probably come across some of mine as I was obsessed. Feel free to PM me if you would like to chat. A problem shared ids a problem halved.xxxxxxxx
Yeah, I can predict myself going to back to the doctor's very soon, and telling her I'm not comfortable, in which case she will refer me. Then I'm going to be in a new realm of worry.
My worry is that she's not actually felt it. But I did ask her, I actually said 'can you definitely feel what I'm talking about'. She said yes, it felt like a tiny pea. But she then immediately said I'm not at all worried about it. She told me that cancer lumps were irregular shaped, non mobile, and very rigid in their area. So I kind of asked her all of the questions I knew would pop into my head moments after leaving. But it's not enough. I need a certified answer as to what it is. In fact that's what is bothering me. The fact she hasn't given 'it' a name. It's just a nothing. But it's not a nothing! It's a little ball.
When I went back in March time about a raised lumpy area on my tongue, (I thought I had oral C for sure), she was pretty honest. She said, I don't think it's anything to be concerned over, but I'd like to get an ENT to look at it just to make sure if it hasn't gone down by next week. Which is reassuring in a way. Because it shows if she's a little unsure, she'd refer me. Which is why I was so sure I'd be getting referred about this thing. So to be told, it's nothing, you're fine, goodbye, I'm kind of unsure of what to do.
Could it be because I told her it'd been there a long time made her less concerned? It's not like a just found it. It's been there a long time, longer than a year I think.
Thanks for your replies xxx
Yeah, I can predict myself going to back to the doctor's very soon, and telling her I'm not comfortable, in which case she will refer me. Then I'm going to be in a new realm of worry.
My worry is that she's not actually felt it. But I did ask her, I actually said 'can you definitely feel what I'm talking about'. She said yes, it felt like a tiny pea. But she then immediately said I'm not at all worried about it. She told me that cancer lumps were irregular shaped, non mobile, and very rigid in their area. So I kind of asked her all of the questions I knew would pop into my head moments after leaving. But it's not enough. I need a certified answer as to what it is. In fact that's what is bothering me. The fact she hasn't given 'it' a name. It's just a nothing. But it's not a nothing! It's a little ball.
When I went back in March time about a raised lumpy area on my tongue, (I thought I had oral C for sure), she was pretty honest. She said, I don't think it's anything to be concerned over, but I'd like to get an ENT to look at it just to make sure if it hasn't gone down by next week. Which is reassuring in a way. Because it shows if she's a little unsure, she'd refer me. Which is why I was so sure I'd be getting referred about this thing. So to be told, it's nothing, you're fine, goodbye, I'm kind of unsure of what to do.
Could it be because I told her it'd been there a long time made her less concerned? It's not like a just found it. It's been there a long time, longer than a year I think.
Thanks for your replies xxx
From her past behaviour you can see that if she thinks she notices anything of concern then she'll refer you - just because she didn't say those exact words this times doesn't mean that she would do any differently.
You're not listening to the reasons she gave for not being concerned, the fact that your lump is small, moveable, has defined edges and has been there a long time without any major change is enough for her to make a diagnosis. She doesn't need to refer you. Even if she did you can be guaranteed that they would say the same at the breast clinic, they won't investigate something that doesn't need it, they (and your doc) deal with enough breast lumps to know the difference.
Trust her, she sounds like a good doctor to me.
If it's a little ball it's a fibroadenoma, as I said, so you are going to have to quit poking and prodding it and just learn to live with it.
Yeah, I am going to have accept it. It's just difficult. I've never had breast pain in my life until I started thinking about the little lump. That's how powerful the brain is. It's the weirdest thing. I wish there was an off button!
I've often wished for that off button too, it would be so much easier if we could switch off our own anxious brains lol.
Have you tried CBT? It can be the equivalent of an off switch if you learn to use it well :)
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