Hi I'm Jennifer!

[jennydong]

Hi everyone,

My name is Jennifer, I'm 30yo and have social anxiety which has began 2 months ago. I am normally outgoing, loud and confident so im really scared as to why this condition has just come about. My SA seems to be triggered only when im around people that know me, like my family and friends. I have told them that i am suffering with anxiety at the moment but iv not made a big deal of it as i don't want them to worry about me. I am scared that i am losing my mind and that they we see this. I have been avoiding meeting them and answering my phone as less as possible. I don't know why im feeling like this. I have read that ppl with SA tend to be more comfortable in front of f&f but i seem to be the opposite. I am going home for christmas and am absolutely dreading it in case i have a panic attack or appear weird or mentally unstable in front of ppl. I get trembles, shaky voice and hot flushes and nothing i can do calms me down. I have massive guilt for avoiding my family and feel like a nut job.

I eat healthy, take vitamins, jog every second day for 4 miles, cut my drink down to 4 glasses every 2-3 weeks, stopped smoking and try to get as much rest but nothing seems to ease it. I have a date on Wednesday with a really nice guy but feel like i will properly have to have 2-3 glasses of wine to calm my nerve before hand which i dont want to do as i dont want to look drunk but its the only way to feel more comfortable.

Has anyone else felt the same?

I would love to hear from some of you. xx

[Sparkle1984]

Welcome to the forums! I'm sure you'll find plenty of help and support here - I certainly have. :)

I think it's probably best if you go to the doctor's for diagnosis and treatment. They will also give you tests to rule out any physical causes of your symptoms, such as thyroid problems.

[craigj1303]

Hi Jenny

It's not unusual for your anxiety to be triggered more around people you know and love. I have exactly the same thing. I've been questioning for ages why the large majority of my anxious thoughts and feelings come on at home around the people I love most. Some days it's been a bit of a relief coming to work where it seems to fade.

I put this down to the fact that these are the people that matter most in our life so it's more important that they don't suffer or feel any negative effects of my behaviours. If a stranger thinks i'm a little odd or something, so what? I just walk away, probably not see them again, not as important. If my wife and kids think I am odd, well then the repercussions could be worse. What if they get fed up with me, my wife might leave me! Oh no!

These are all natural thoughts and feelings I have realised.

When you think you appear weird or mentally unstable in front of ppl, you don't. At worst you probably just appear a little bit distant maybe. The best road to recovery is to accept your anxiety is there, and let it be there. Eventually it will go, but it will take a bit of time. The more you worry about it, the more anxious you become.

[chromegirl]

Hey Jenny,

I can relate to your symptoms, especially being frightened to "appear" unhinged in front of people. That worry propelled my anxiety and made it worse at one time. I have found that, for me, it is extremely helpful to TELL people when I'm having anxiety. You will find that instead of judging you or thinking you're n, people will be receptive and may even relate... it's just a great comfort to not have to HIDE the feeling.

ps: You're not "losing your mind," as you say. I promise!

CG

---------- Post added at 12:41 ---------- Previous post was at 12:40 ----------

*nutty, is what I meant

[Hopeandlove]

chrome good advice!