cpe1978
12-11-13, 11:54
Hi All,
Now just to be clear, I am not for a second suggesting that people who have HA are selfish. What I am suggesting is that one of the symptoms of HA is a selfishness and an inability to see what is really important in life.
Last night I logged on to this forum and discovered that one of the posters on here that I am closest to has been diagnosed with MS. How perverse that this wasn't their health anxiety. Aside from the fact that obviously it isn't pleasant to receive such a diagnosis itreally got me thinking. Firstly about how you can be helpful in supporting someone, but also what HA turns us into. Lying awake in bed last night thinking about it, made me think I wanted to try and get across what I thought, probably not in a terribly coherent fashion.
I have learned a lot about HA over recent weeks and months since I joined this forum. You start to see trends and cycles and I thought I would just spend 20 minutes writing down my thoughts.
We need to face our fears - experiencing our worst nightmare is rarely as bad as we anticipated it to be. I suspect everyone of us, were we to receive a diagnosis of some sort that we will respond more positively and robustly than we imagine we will.
We must control what we can and accept what we can't - We cannot control whether or not we acquire some sort of health condition. In fact there is very little as certain as the fact that we all will at some stage. 25% of the UK population lives with a long term health condition. What we can control is our aversive response to the fear. We have to make sure we place our focus in the right place otherwise we are doomed to failure.
Reassurance doesnt work - You see it time and time again on this forum. People asking for reassurance on last time, only to appear 24 hrs later to either ask the same question or to ask about something else. We have to break this cycle otherwise we are just swimming around the bottom of a pit of despair.
Tests dont reassure us - Similarly you see post after post hunting for this scan or another. The test that will provide the final reassurance. They never do! In fact having unecssary tests can feed your anxiety by indentifying the dozens of benign abnormaities that we all have that then warrant further investigation and further anxiety.
We have to trust our GP - The most important thing I have done that I believe will support my recovery is finding a GP who understands. I am visiting her every six weeks which enables me to save up my concerns and practice not running to the Dr every two minutes. People often post on here doubting their GP. It seems illogical to me that a GP would deny necessary tests and risk a medical negligence claim.
We have to trust our bodies - Most people dont have HA and most people when they are diagnosed with an illness or condition survive. Those people dont scan their bodies, pick on the tiniest swelling and obsess about it. They end up at the GP because something obviously wrong happens. We need to learn to trust our bodies.
We need to remember what is important - There is post after post on this forum from people talking about the impact that HA has on their families. The most recent one was Willous whose wife had moved out with their kids. This should provide all the motivation you need to get better.
Recovery ain't going to be easy - But hey, what in life that is worth doing is? It isnt good enough though to sit passively constantly seeking reassurance without a clear plan of action to tackle the real issue. A Dr once said to me when talking about tackling mental health conditions you need three things:
- Insight - an understanding of why you feel like you do.
- Strategy - How are you going to tackle the issue
- Flexibility - How will you adapt when things don't work?
Being anxious is comfortable for some of us - Sometimes it is easier to stay anxious than get better. Again I think you see it time and time again on this forum.
Fundamentally however I think it is so important that we all have a plan and an understanding of the real issue at play. This is brought home more than ever on the rare occasion that you hear about someone actually being diagnosed with something.
Sorry for the incoherent post. Others will say this stuff far more eloquently than me.
Now just to be clear, I am not for a second suggesting that people who have HA are selfish. What I am suggesting is that one of the symptoms of HA is a selfishness and an inability to see what is really important in life.
Last night I logged on to this forum and discovered that one of the posters on here that I am closest to has been diagnosed with MS. How perverse that this wasn't their health anxiety. Aside from the fact that obviously it isn't pleasant to receive such a diagnosis itreally got me thinking. Firstly about how you can be helpful in supporting someone, but also what HA turns us into. Lying awake in bed last night thinking about it, made me think I wanted to try and get across what I thought, probably not in a terribly coherent fashion.
I have learned a lot about HA over recent weeks and months since I joined this forum. You start to see trends and cycles and I thought I would just spend 20 minutes writing down my thoughts.
We need to face our fears - experiencing our worst nightmare is rarely as bad as we anticipated it to be. I suspect everyone of us, were we to receive a diagnosis of some sort that we will respond more positively and robustly than we imagine we will.
We must control what we can and accept what we can't - We cannot control whether or not we acquire some sort of health condition. In fact there is very little as certain as the fact that we all will at some stage. 25% of the UK population lives with a long term health condition. What we can control is our aversive response to the fear. We have to make sure we place our focus in the right place otherwise we are doomed to failure.
Reassurance doesnt work - You see it time and time again on this forum. People asking for reassurance on last time, only to appear 24 hrs later to either ask the same question or to ask about something else. We have to break this cycle otherwise we are just swimming around the bottom of a pit of despair.
Tests dont reassure us - Similarly you see post after post hunting for this scan or another. The test that will provide the final reassurance. They never do! In fact having unecssary tests can feed your anxiety by indentifying the dozens of benign abnormaities that we all have that then warrant further investigation and further anxiety.
We have to trust our GP - The most important thing I have done that I believe will support my recovery is finding a GP who understands. I am visiting her every six weeks which enables me to save up my concerns and practice not running to the Dr every two minutes. People often post on here doubting their GP. It seems illogical to me that a GP would deny necessary tests and risk a medical negligence claim.
We have to trust our bodies - Most people dont have HA and most people when they are diagnosed with an illness or condition survive. Those people dont scan their bodies, pick on the tiniest swelling and obsess about it. They end up at the GP because something obviously wrong happens. We need to learn to trust our bodies.
We need to remember what is important - There is post after post on this forum from people talking about the impact that HA has on their families. The most recent one was Willous whose wife had moved out with their kids. This should provide all the motivation you need to get better.
Recovery ain't going to be easy - But hey, what in life that is worth doing is? It isnt good enough though to sit passively constantly seeking reassurance without a clear plan of action to tackle the real issue. A Dr once said to me when talking about tackling mental health conditions you need three things:
- Insight - an understanding of why you feel like you do.
- Strategy - How are you going to tackle the issue
- Flexibility - How will you adapt when things don't work?
Being anxious is comfortable for some of us - Sometimes it is easier to stay anxious than get better. Again I think you see it time and time again on this forum.
Fundamentally however I think it is so important that we all have a plan and an understanding of the real issue at play. This is brought home more than ever on the rare occasion that you hear about someone actually being diagnosed with something.
Sorry for the incoherent post. Others will say this stuff far more eloquently than me.