View Full Version : A couple of things which have helped me :)
'm finally well on my way to beating this health anxiety :) A fe!w months ago I wouldn't believe this, heck a few months ago I didn't think I'd even be alive right now but unsuprisingly I'm still here alive and kicking.
Over the past 6 months I've diagnosed myself with no less than 20 life threatening diseases/illnesses, not one of them I actually had, despite the fact I just knew I.had them, and I couldn't possibly be wrong, oh no. I have been crippled by anxiety to the point I cried daily, cried myself to sleep, couldn't be alone incase I dropped dead, I was constantly seeking medical reassurance even though it never reassured me.
My whole life fell apart, but I now believe I have (nearly) found peace. I am not saying I'm completely over it, because i'm not. I'm still convinced I have an aneurysm, however my fear is no longer running my life. So I.have a few tips, mostly from on here that have been said better by others, but I just want to say what has helped me.
Acceptance is the first thing. Accepting that there are no certainties in life and that things happen that we can't control was the starting point for me. Unfortunately it is a fact of life that will never change. Worrying about what you can't control is such a waste, the outcome is exactly the same. However, whilst we are worrying about dying, we are not living. Life is precious, fragile, we need to take every day and just live. We cannot get the time we spend worrying back, hours, days, weeks, months and even years are wasted. We will never get another life, so we should spend it wisely, and happy.
Listen to the professionals! These people are qualified to make a diagnosis based on your symptoms. We, nor google do not. So why do we think we know better? If I.had believed the doctor, he said I was fine, I should have gone home happy, but instead I went and made an.appointment with Dr Google.
Which brings me to my next point. Dont google! Every.minor symptom will be a symptom of some serious disease, and google will kindly find them for you. There are so many horror stories out there, but nobody writes about how they went to the doctors they were fine and went home again, which lets truth be told is what happens most often. Too much knowledge is bad! Step away, it.only makes things worse.
I have also started to rationalize my.thoughts. Everytime I have a negative thought, I force myself to add a positive one after. This has helped me so much. I had.a.headache, I think oh no brain tumor, but now.I will add 'but if I.had a brain tumor I.would also have.over symptoms' at the end, it helps me see how irrational that thinking is.
Our bodies are clever, they have ways of telling us that.something is wrong. If there was a problem that is genuinely life threatening, then you would know. If we were at deaths door, I dont think we would be googling our symptoms and discussing them on an internet forum :)
Distractions work extremely well. Anything that will take your mind off illnesses is great. Sometimes I will be so busy doing something else that.a.few hours later it will.just occur to me that I'm still alive.
I feel a million times better than I ever did. I am just so grateful I'm still here, I am just going to live, life is short, I've wasted enough. Time to live my life now. And now I've written this sods law says I will.now have a ruptured aneurysm lol. Hopefully not though!
You have no idea how happy it makes me to see you post this!
Well done Roxy. I genuinely believe 90% of the battle is identifying the correct enemy.
Well bloody done Roxy, you are doing amazingly well.
This is an excellent post and I hope many people read it and take note. Guys, read some of Roxy's previous post and then read this - it is proof positive that with work and determination, you CAN beat this.
You should be so proud of yourself Roxy, I know we all are
Thankyou both so much. I know a lot of people gave me some fantastic advice in the past (both of you included) and I was far to wrapped up in my anxiety to take any notice. I just wanted to post this to show people that their efforts were not in vein, and I've given myself a good kick up the bum that was needed to start to get my life back.
I feel absolutely fantastic (bar my possible brain aneurysm lol) and I hope it can continue for all of us x
Pah Brain aneuerysm. Katie once told me about 'Can't pee straight disease' now that is the one you ought to be worried about :)
Just remember, we will all have setbacks - acknowledge them as that and get back on the waggon!
We have ALL been there hon, so convinced that something terrible is happening to us that we can't take in what people are saying. I for one did it to my own poor husband on a regular basis.
The fact that you are doing this well, even with some residual fears is a testament to your character. Well done darlin.
Oh yes. The dreaded "can't pee straight" disease. As Chris says, that's a scary one. That and "Bad at washing up-itis". My husband is a chronic sufferer of both :-(
Is this the same Roxy?... Well done girl! :yahoo:
Take note of this post everyone. We're all holding you accountable ya hear?
I'm smiling over here :)
Haha! Yes we all have setbacks, I believe this is mine, but that's all it is, a setback. I WILL NOT go backwards! The only way is up.x
Washing-up-itis? There is a guaranteed cure for that by that well known phramaceutical company Bosch! Personally I find irritable ironing disease far more distressing!
Washing-up-itis? There is a guaranteed cure for that by that well known phramaceutical company Bosch! Personally I find irritable ironing disease far more distressing!
If that's the worst you've got then you have clearly never experienced the horrifying effects of "Why-didn't-you-tell-me-not-to-put-the-delicates-in-the-dryer-for-4-hours" syndrome.
Tragic I tell you, tragic :weep:
Oh katesa, my boyfriend suffered on a regular basis. I can only imagine how frustrating it must have been. I used to cry that he had to tell our daughter that I loved her, he used to say no because you can do it yourself and here I sstill am!
Yes fishmanpa, this is the same me!.just with a different attitude! :) we had such a beautiful summer and I totally.ruined it with my anxiety, I refuse to make Christmas the same!
Oh and I have washing.up itis already, I dont do pots!
Hi roxy, I've pm'd you, please reply if you get a moment thanks x
Oh katesa, my boyfriend suffered on a regular basis. I can only imagine how frustrating it must have been. I used to cry that he had to tell our daughter that I loved her, he used to say no because you can do it yourself and here I sstill am!
Yes fishmanpa, this is the same me!.just with a different attitude! :) we had such a beautiful summer and I totally.ruined it with my anxiety, I refuse to make Christmas the same!
Oh and I have washing.up itis already, I dont do pots!
Awww sweets. The things we do to ourselves eh? It still makes my eyes well up to think of the times my baby boy was smiling at me and wriggling in excitement because he wanted me to play with him - and I'd be sat poking my hurty bits to see if they hurt more or less than yesterday then start crying. My husband would then take the poor little thing in to the other room.
Don't be hard on yourself. It is an illness just like any other. And the great thing is, we can beat it and you are doing amazingly well.
Am I the only one who finds washing the pots strangely therapeutic?
Am I the only one who finds washing the pots strangely therapeutic?
Definitively...................................... ...............YES!
Definitively...................................... ...............YES!
So...........I'm an oddity, even on this board?
((Sigh))
Figures.
'fraid so..........unique is interesting. However we all have them:
- My favourite smell is petrol
- Whan I go to watch football I have developed a very specific toilet going ritual which has now become superstition even if I dont need to go
I could go on :)
Ok ok, you just have to share this toilet going ritual now.
I've a feeling it will make the quirks of Roxy and I look like nothing.
Well it all started many years ago. I have been a Plymouth Argyle fan for 30 years now and I used to get quite excited before the game kicked off. So to avoid needing to leave my seat during the first half I always went to the loo literally seconds before kick off. Then the same at half time.
Now that I am a bit older it has sort of stuck and has become a sort of ritual.
Did I ever tell you about the time I accidentially weed in a sink in a pub in London?
God I can relate to all of that Kate! I hope to make it up to her now though.
I haven't washed a single pot in months! I cook he washes, always been the way (until I get a dishwasher ha)
Oh petrol smells lovely. But my favourite smell is.gravy granules, mmmmm...
Well it all started many years ago. I have been a Plymouth Argyle fan for 30 years now and I used to get quite excited before the game kicked off. So to avoid needing to leave my seat during the first half I always went to the loo literally seconds before kick off. Then the same at half time.
Now that I am a bit older it has sort of stuck and has become a sort of ritual.
Did I ever tell you about the time I accidentially weed in a sink in a pub in London?
:scared15::scared15::scared15:
Roxy? You think YOU have issues?
In my defence, it did look quite a lot like a urinal and I just thought it was dead fancy and efficient having taps on the urinals. It was only when I looked to the left and saw the actual urinals that I realised my mistake and relief flooded through me that no one else was in there!
Ok enough about my toilet problems - we all have little idiosyncrasies :)
Ok enough about my toilet problems - we all have little idiosyncrasies :)
Bathroom threads (especially poo) are a fairly common HA theme ;)
Bathroom threads (especially poo) are a fairly common HA theme ;)
Indeed. I've been considering going back to Skippy's post yesterday (the one asking what symbol best sums up health anxiety) and changing my response to "One of those little aquarium fish nets and a toilet bowl"
Indeed. I've been considering going back to Skippy's post yesterday (the one asking what symbol best sums up health anxiety) and changing my response to "One of those little aquarium fish nets and a toilet bowl"
I will now be forever haunted by that image!
Roxy I missed this post today! I'm very happy to see you getting a handle on the nature of your anxiety now :) It'll be worth all that hard work, you'll feel so much better about yourself and empowered by your own strength.
The rational thoughts get easier. It's something that I still struggle with sometimes, but it does get easier. Yesterday I got this sore bump under my ear, and once upon a time I'd totally have freaked out about it - but yesterday I worried a little and then was able to just rationalise it and let it go. That's big progress for me lol.
Soon you'll be doing the same, keep going :)
ThAnkyou honey. You are also one of the people who have offered me some fab advice :)
I find now that I dont have to force myself to add the rational thoughts, I usually do it automatically out of habit now, however I'm struggling for a rational thought about brain aneurysms!
ThAnkyou honey. You are also one of the people who have offered me some fab advice :)
I find now that I dont have to force myself to add the rational thoughts, I usually do it automatically out of habit now, however I'm struggling for a rational thought about brain aneurysms!
I'll give you a rational thought hon - you don't have one. Because your doctor and more importantly I said so. Would I risk my internet credibility and coolness* by being wrong?
*I have no internet credibility or coolness. But I'm determined to get some by being right all the time.
Haha! You do make me smile :). I had my eyes checked over in July and August and there was no sign of one then :) However my eye muscles 'are in.such a state' because of me not wearing my glasses. I hope this is the.cause of my eye pain instead :)
Haha! You do make me smile :). I had my eyes checked over in July and August and there was no sign of one then :) However my eye muscles 'are in.such a state' because of me not wearing my glasses. I hope this is the.cause of my eye pain instead :)
Put your glasses on! ;)
They hurt my eyes too much! My prescription is being lowered and I should be getting them back tommorow :). I've not worn them in about.10 years so I find it.hard to adjust to them. Besides I look ridiculous in them hah
Lol I look totally gormless in mine.
It defo sounds like the reason for your pain though hon. Much more logical than an aneurysm! X
They hurt my eyes too much! My prescription is being lowered and I should be getting them back tommorow :). I've not worn them in about.10 years so I find it.hard to adjust to them. Besides I look ridiculous in them hah
Ohhh dang... I had a nerdy emoticon but the code didn't work..... Had to bust on ya :)
So pleased to read this Roxy!
I too am trying hard with the whole positive thought thing. Iv been managing well but tonight im lying in bed with chest pains. Started with sharp pains in left side but im ok with that being trapped wind or just anxiety . Just now the centre of my chest is very tight and its worrying me ( biggest fear is heart attack) but so far i think im managing to be rational. I really dont want to have to take diazepam or anything. I really want to do it myself. Iv been lying here wondering if i should wake my husband for help or f i really actually need help?! Im guessing id be dead or in alot more pain f it was a real heart attack .....
Good luck roxy, really glad you are finally feeling more positive.keep the inspirational posts coming xx
Thankyou Kirsty :)
Its not been easy at all, some days are better than others. Take today, I have a pain in my upper left abdomen. It happens about every 30 seconds. Its not a severe pain, but its bothering me and its taking me all my willpower not to cry and panic x
How's it going little rox-fox? If you're having a bit of a relapse......I promise we wont shout at you (too much). We've all been there and will support you through it x
It went away and I didn't worry! I went for a walk and completely forgot about it! :)
I have had my glasses back and have been wearing them all day (first time in 10 years!). My eye and.head are hurting, but not as much as my ears.are from the glasses arms, pesky things! All in all (aneurysm aside) I feel fab.
Hope.youre doing well too! X
I'm just great hon thanks.
Well done girlie, you're doing simply brilliantly
What an inspirational post I'm new on here and like yourself have had about 20 'life threatening'diseases in the late couple of weeks and last year I had an allergy plus anxiety which I just knew was throat cancer -well still here and all symptoms subsided so maybe I'm not as psychic as I thought I was -found myself doing same again over the littlest niggle -want to turn off my microscope now and get on with the life I can have and should be living and your post has given me some faith in the ability to do that -thank you
Ah thankyou kate, you're doing brilliant too! I feel a bit of a let down though what with my brain aneurysm lurking away somewhere lol.
Awh Har, thankyou. I wrote my post in the hope that it would encourage some people who are like me to see that it can.actually get better (something I would not have believed myself) so I'm so glad that you have some hope.
I would write.down all the things i've diagnosed myself with but I'd be here all day, honestly. And each time I was totally.convinced that this was 'the one'.
Just an example, I had decided I was going to collapse and die any minute. I.had chest pains and ddizziness. I rang the NHS. On the phone they asked me if I'd been diagnosed with an aortic aneurysm. No I said, never heard of one. Anyway get the all clear from the hospital, felt fine and I kid you not in the car on the.way home I decided to google aortic aneurysms. Oh god, that was it. Didn't matter that it generally affects male smokers over 65 whereas im a 22 year old female non smoker, oh no, that was it. God it took me.weeks to get over that!
Every niggle was life threatening, it was exhausting. I've cime to the conclusion life threatening illnesses are not 'niggles' they would be a lot more severe!
Life is an extremely precious gift, you cant get the time back. Youre still here, take that as your sign that you are.actually okay :). My dad tells me I've.had more comebacks than Elvis lol. We've survived multiple terminal and life threatening illnesses in.just a matter of weeks, we're medical marvels :):):).
At the minute I'm contemplating death by hobnob as I.have a sharp bit stuck!
... Ok.hobnob dislodged disaster averted!
Roxy, firstly well done. Secondly I am fascinated by how quickly you have managed to do this. Only a week or two ago you were struggling. What's changed?
Honestly though I am so incredibly pleased you are feeling better, I have always felt the pain in your posts and am chuffed you are on the mend.
Roxy, firstly well done. Secondly I am fascinated by how quickly you have managed to do this. Only a week or two ago you were struggling. What's changed?
Honestly though I am so incredibly pleased you are feeling better, I have always felt the pain in your posts and am chuffed you are on the mend.
Thanks Cpe :)
The main thing that has changed is that I realised my daughter had started to be affected by my constant worrying. She's only little and she needs me, and I vowed from then on and I will put any worrys to one side to make sure she had her mum back. I needed to do it for her sake, that's my job as a parent :)
Besides that, as I stopped worrying my symptoms started disappearing. this made me realise that they actually were anxiety all along, and I was worrying over nothing. I totally wasted and ruined the gorgeous summer we had, I wasn't about to do that with Christmas (my favourite time of year).
I'm not totally there, as I've said I still thoroughly believe I have an aneurysm, it worries me but I can't let it affect my life anymore than it already has x
Feel like I'm letting myself down today. Im getting frustrated with the continual eye pains that go into my head. Usually I'd distract myself but I'm all alone thinking about brain aneurysms...
Feel like I'm letting myself down today. Im getting frustrated with the continual eye pains that go into my head. Usually I'd distract myself but I'm all alone thinking about brain aneurysms...
Try this suggestion Roxy. It's a little technique I use to help maintain a positive attitude. The quote in my signature I have taped up in various places in my home (on the mirror in the powder room, the fridge, on my computer at work and as my screen saver at home etc.). When I start to get down about something or stressed, I read that and it reminds me of what's important in life and what's not. Take a pic of your daughter and keep it in front of you to remind yourself why you're fighting back. Whenever you get an eye niggle, look at your little one and know there's nothing wrong and what you need to do to beat the beast.
Positive thoughts!
I can now convince myself there is nothing wrong about everything but flipping brain aneurysms! I have been googling way too much for my own good, I'd like to think it would have already ruptured by now because of all the stress I've put myself through but hey ho I'll plod on until it does rupture!
Roxy you will be fine, go girl get your life, back enjoy your daughter, enjoy christmas, embrace life. Simi
95% of the time I'm fine, I live my life like.a 'normal' person. Its only the odd 5% of the time when my eye and.head pains are at the worst that I will sit and worry.
I know these are symptoms of an unruptured aneurysm and I havent had a CT/MRI like many others have for ongoing head pain, so how on earth do I stop worrying about it?! I've.also suffered.eye strain.religiously and this is a.totally different feeling. Its totally getting in the way of full recovery and I've had enough.:(
A wise man once said to me that sometimes things just take 'the tincture of time'. Personally I genuinely believe that if any clinician had the slightest concern that you had an aneurysm that they would have referred you in a shot. I remember years ago when a GP thought that an ex of mine had a pulmonary embolism - I was out doing sport and arrived home to find a note to say that she was in hospital - she went to the GP that morning - it was nothing.
Similarly when my wife was pregnant with our first child a GP thought there was an outside chance she had a blood clot. I blinked, and she had disappeared into hospital.
I think you know deep down that you don't but can't get rid of the fear. Try letting is wash over you for a bit, don't run away from it, tolerate it and see if over time it abates a little. If it does then keep going until you just get bored of worrying about it.
See you fear like a petulant child craving attention. Sometimes the only way to make it calm down is to not give it the attention it craves!
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