View Full Version : HIV worry
This is my first post and i'm very worried.
I had sex 5 weeks ago with a girl i'd never met before. We used a condom for about 99% of the time we had sex, but for a few seconds at the beginning we didn't until i put a condom on.
I didn't think anything of it at the time but the next morning the girl had a cough. I asked if she was ok, she said it's ok, not contagious, gets it all the time.
5 days after this night, i had severe pain in my mouth and mostly right tonsil. My right gland in my neck swelled up too. I put this down to tonsillitis as i've had this once before and seemed very similar. I had fever the first 3 nights, and the illness had gone in 5 days.
Other symptoms i have felt the week after this, tingling in my right thigh and lower back pain. I have done stretching and this has eased off.
4 weeks after the initial incident, I picked up a cold (sore throat, sweating, blocked sinuses). I have had this up til now.
Today i went to the clinic for a HIV test (and other STD checks). I should also point out that i have been diagnosed with herpes in the past. I have to wait two weeks now for my blood test results. They also advised me to go for a second blood test in 7 weeks (that'll be a total of 12 since possible infection).
I have found a clinic that does Rapid HIV POCT tests for free and results within 10 minutes. I will visit them tomorrow.
Any comments, advice, help etc would be most welcome in coping with the next few weeks.
Hi Jeff,
If all you did was come in contact for a few seconds before using protection, it's highly unlikely you contracted anything. It's not like your diver went swimming in the deep end if you know what I mean. It sounds like coincidentally you caught a bug of some sort which are the symptoms you're experiencing.
In the future, common sense must prevail as you can can get an STD and also pass on your HSV even when not having an outbreak.
Positive thoughts.
Thank you for your comment. I was thinking the same, the risk is still there but hopefully reduced.
As you say, it shouldn't happen, even for a couple of seconds.
Any more comments welcome from anyone.
This is my first post and i'm very worried.
I had sex 5 weeks ago with a girl i'd never met before. We used a condom for about 99% of the time we had sex, but for a few seconds at the beginning we didn't until i put a condom on.
I didn't think anything of it at the time but the next morning the girl had a cough. I asked if she was ok, she said it's ok, not contagious, gets it all the time.
5 days after this night, i had severe pain in my mouth and mostly right tonsil. My right gland in my neck swelled up too. I put this down to tonsillitis as i've had this once before and seemed very similar. I had fever the first 3 nights, and the illness had gone in 5 days.
Other symptoms i have felt the week after this, tingling in my right thigh and lower back pain. I have done stretching and this has eased off.
4 weeks after the initial incident, I picked up a cold (sore throat, sweating, blocked sinuses). I have had this up til now.
Today i went to the clinic for a HIV test (and other STD checks). I should also point out that i have been diagnosed with herpes in the past. I have to wait two weeks now for my blood test results. They also advised me to go for a second blood test in 7 weeks (that'll be a total of 12 since possible infection).
I have found a clinic that does Rapid HIV POCT tests for free and results within 10 minutes. I will visit them tomorrow.
Any comments, advice, help etc would be most welcome in coping with the next few weeks.
It's a pretty low risk, as fishman said. Low chance of her having it in the first place, plus female to male transmission is less 'easy', and in any case there wasn't long-term 'contact'.
I'd have said you got a virus (possibly from her, upper respiratory viral infections can be pretty contagious, but equally possibly from someone at work, or on a bus, or whatever) straight afterwards, and possibly another one now. There's a lot of it about. The tingling in your right thigh, weird though it sounds, could actually be the HSV. I have it, for my sins, and sometimes I get tingles and slight shooting pains around the tops of my legs. Also my outbreaks sometimes manifest themselves as mild flu-like symptoms.
I know that you know this, but while you're worrying about whether you've caught HIV from this girl, you might have given her HSV...
The only comment I cam make is that I agree totally with Fishmanpa :)
You spent the night with a girl who had a cold, and a few days later you developed lots of cold symptoms. I'm sure you can see the logic here that it is much more likely you have caught her cold than caught HIV from her, which would be unlikely anyway from what you say, plus she would have had to have it in the first place.
Worth getting tested for other STD's though, but try not to fixate on HIV at is so unlikely
I once had a bit of a fixation on HIV which was amazing really as I hadn't put myself in a risky situation. Anyway I did enough research during that period to know that for HIV at least your chances are infinitesimally small. To the point where in honesty as a result of that it isn't worth testing for HIV.
Wouldn't harm though to get a full STD check just to be on the safe side. But I think you can confidently put HIV out of your mind.
Hello I have a friend with hiv ... Here consultant said to me once that it's actually really hard to catch its not passed on very easily for example the person my friend got it off she was with him for around 5-6 months before she even caught it.. I have had hiv worries I had full unprotected sex an was absolutely paranoid I had it actually had all the symptoms down to a rash! Everything ... Got my results back 3 days ago..... Negative. I really think the only thing u are likely to have caught off this girl is a cough Hun.
I did want to add one more thing. This goes for everyone that's sexually active. Inquire about getting the HPV vaccine.
Positive thoughts
Thank you for all the replies. I will try to reply tomorrow after i have the rapid test and see what the result is. Thanks again.....
I wouldn't worry. I've had this fear before and dr's have told me it is a very hard disease to contract. Even when the riskiest activity is performed (unprotected anal sex) there's still only a 1 in 200 chance. You'll be fine :
Ok.
I have just been through this.
I thought I had it from one encounter 8 years ago.
I went to the clinic and she told me.. 'Hypo, you don't have it' She went on and told me that as long as I slept with English straight, none drug using men I won't have it (and even if I had a higher risk sexual past I still would be low low risk). She then said that even if they had HIV I would most likely need to have sex more than once to catch it and she knows many many people who have slept with HIV positive people for years and not got it.
Don't get me wrong, you should always wear condoms and be careful of HIV but she said I had more chance of winning the lottery twice over.
If you are a man it is even harder.
My result was negative.
So based on what I learnt I feel confident to tell you that you don't have it, and I don't normally say such things as I am not a Dr, but you don't have it.
Any news on the negative test yet :yesyes:
No news. I went to the clinic but they can't give the rapid hiv test at only 5 weeks. I have to wait another week. So another week of me worrying :(
Thanks for asking tho.
Don't worry at all mate. HIV fear is what started my health anxiety off. It's hard to look logically but you have a lot more chance of winning the lottery and god knows what else. Look at this as the best thing that's happened to you. Sounds stupid I know but it's made you realise how that moment has caused all this worry. Not saying it's your fault and we have all been there but at the end of the day you are worrying a lot. Firstly there is slim to no chance of the girl having it and EVEN if she did you would have a 0.0sonetgibg chance of catching it from full intercourse then you also were protected for most of it so that makes it even slimmer. As a nurse once told me....you should be worrying about other things like chlamydia etc. and it's true. PM if you want because believe me, this fear paralysed me for so long and I have spoken to so many doctors etc.
Thanks, i may PM you through the week. It's the waiting and worrying that is so bad.
As i said in my original post, i have been diagnosed with HSV in the past and this increases the chance of HIV infection from what i've read. I am also today starting with an outbreak of HSV which means my immune system must be low, this has added to my worry. Is my body fighting a bigger infection which is lowering my immune system. As I said, i already had a cold last week and tonsillitis 4 weeks ago.
Also, as this girl was a one night stand (my first encounter like this) :( she may be someone that has lots of one night stands, she seemed to suggest this while talking. So when everyone mentions statistics i seem to not listen to them. All i can do is wait for the results, i know this, but the wait is hurting so bad.
Don't worry, the chances of that are tiny, though i wouldn't do it again if i was you, even a cat only has 9 lives! I once had four bed partners in one day, i didn't worry much and i was fine all the same. But would i do it again? Not really it's like playing chicken.
Don't worry, it will be fine.
It's ridiculous how much i am now worrying about this now. I have just sat for 2 hours reading more things on google. I don't know how i'm going to get through these next few days. There is a small red patch on my stomach that i'm thinking is a rash and i have a few small ulcer type things in my mouth.
I'm basically assuming i'm positive now and figuring out how i will react to the news.
Why worry, worry when it happens. Until that time just enjoy life but be careful....As for Dr Google, well what more can i say.
I thought i should give an update on this as it is still ongoing.
So I found a local clinic that said they do the rapid test and i decided to visit them this morning. They said they only do rapid tests after 12 weeks but could do the full blood test today. The nurse could see i was worrying and told me to come back at 5pm and the results would be in. Great.......so i thought! I worried all day, waiting until 5pm.
When i arrived, the doctor calls me in and says "how can i help you?", turns out he knew nothing about the results. He was most unhelpful, saying "we dont offer a 1 day result service......call back tomorrow" etc etc. I told him this is different to the nurse's story earlier. He phoned the lab and they had misplaced my sample. Took them 20 minutes to find it. At this point i knew i wasnt getting the results today. I saw another nurse who assured me results would be available tomorrow.
In this one clinic, two people said they'd phone the results tomorrow, two have said they won't give results over the phone.
I'm still in a panic over all this, but the lack of clarity and commonality on everything is actually really quite poor. Everything from what date certain tests can be done, how results can be communicated and how it will be followed up. It certainly doesn't fill me with confidence if my worrying of a positive result is correct :(
I got a negative result after 5 weeks. That has to be good right? I know it's not 100% accurate at this stage, but 5 weeks is a good indicator? Added to the fact i was low to medium risk anyway. It still hasnt stopped me worrying though :( That wont happen until 12 weeks i dont think.
Jeff, you do not have HIV.
I guarantee it.
So i'm 8 weeks into the window period and still worry about this. I had two blood tests at the 5 week stage (separate clinics) and both were negative, i believe both were duo 4th generation tests. 4 weeks to go until i go back for the 12 week test.
I have always been a little bit of a worrier but this has really kicked my anxiety over illnesses off in a huge way. Every little spot, sore, pain, i assume is related to this unresolved hiv scare or something else like cancer. I have found some black dots inside my cheek in my mouth and am straight away panicking and in my mind i'm desperate to see a dentist to check it. This whole experience hasn't been good.
I would say that it is very unlikely! A cough necessarily wouldn't suggest anything either, I'm sure a lot of people around have coughs!
Please put your mind at ease. You quite certainly don't have HIV! Symptoms are probably anxiety related!
I wanted to give an update on this, just briefly.
I had another blood test at 11 weeks and am awaiting the result. It was 6 days ago, and they say if they don't contact me within two weeks then it's negative. So far so good. In addition to my negative result at 5 weeks this is hopefully good news.
However, the original hiv worry really triggered overall worries in me personally. I now worry about a few skin spots i have that are new and have a dermatology appointment this week. I also have recurrent pain and a lump in the roof of my mouth, my pallet and am seeing my dentist at the end of the week.
I have been stressed and feel a pulsing in my forehead now for 5 days, aching in my lower ribs etc. Now I have come down with ulcers in my mouth and a cold/fever.
I have tried meditation the last few days so i'll see how that continues and yoga too. I'm usually a pretty fit person and do lots of running, go the gym etc. But these problems with my immune system don't seem to go away despite how healthy i eat. I don't know if it's my mind causing these problems and my body showing symptoms of stress or vice versa.
Jeff,
Anxiety and stress cause real physical symptoms and they can be scary. Just read the "symptoms" list on the left side of the page and you'll see. This HIV scare has triggered some anxiety in you. That's what you need to focus on and treat.
Positive thoughts
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