Good day. ..... mixed results but on the whole quite positive

[har76]

Well after deciding today was going to be a good day it has been pretty much that way so far. ...I have had odd dips and haven't manage to shut my self scanner off completely it has been chatting away albeit a bit quieter. Been out shopping got stressed out as really stuck what to get my kids for Christmas and that made me feel like a bad parent for a bit and then a bit later started to feel the old 'its getting dark' nervousness feeling which I think then made me feel a little jelly-legged which then caused the what if there is more than just anxiety at play etc etc -so I took the dog for a walk -this didn't really help much except to prove I still have the energy to take him out for a walk so that must be something. ..right?-Anyway I'm still determined not to let this win and to focus on getting some help cbt soon as possible I'm really hoping I can do this without medication as I want to be able to know that I did this and therefore if it recurs I can handle it -I think I just don't like this time of the evening for some reason -I have a phobia of dusk:roflmao:

[Rennie1989]

You've done fantastically well today, you must be proud of yourself. There will times where your patience and tolerance will be tested but as long as you accept the challenge and try your hardest then you can achieve anything.

Keep up the good work :hugs:

[har76]

Thank you been getting a bit scared that I will always have this problem because right now I keep thinking back to times in the past when I have had anxiety to varying degrees and am struggling to remember times when I haven't which must have been just as many as I am sure I haven't always felt like this! Maybe (positive slant here we come) I am doing this because I want to take this seriously this time and learn how to overcome it properly rather than letting it fade a bit but never really addressing my unhelpful thinking habits and taking proper control of it as I never really viewed it as a problem except on three significant examples(this is my third) when it had really taken hold - I'm now willing to accept I will have these feelings thoughts etc for any longer -just hope I can respond to the help I am going to get and then the rest of my life I will be back to happiness. I'm going to stop focusing on what I have been in past Yes I can really find examples of how I have felt anxiety in past but I am telling myself that was then this is now