Obsessive negative thinking

[NoPoet]

Hi all. It seems that my long-running anxiety and depression issues might be the result of obsessive negative thinking.

Last month I tried an SSRI called sertraline and it seems to have triggered an "anxiety episode" which includes severe OCD: constant, repetitive negative thoughts that I do not seem to have when I am well, but which have damaged my confidence and caused a lot of distress.

I do not intend to act on these thoughts, the very idea of them upsets me, and I understand this is a classic sign of OCD. I also heard of a recent study in which, out of a group of people suffering from severe OCD, precisely no-one acted on their obsessive thoughts.

I'm seeing my therapist on Tuesday to start treatment for OCD. It is a relief to think that my many, many symptoms could all be boiled down to this, but I am looking for advice and tips from anyone else who has gone through this horrible experience.

Thanks in advance.

[Bonnibelle]

I've suffered severe anxiety and PTSD since an attack last year and suddenly a year later I've had horrible intrusive thoughts that I worry about constantly, all day, worrying I'm that kind of person...... The thoughts upset me so I know it's all anxiety and a form of OCD.

Negative thoughts kick in when we are at our weakest with our anxiety. Try reading the book 'At last a life' it explains so much xx

[NoPoet]

Hi Bonnibelle, I've heard of that book, I'll get it when I get paid next week :) I've got a book called "The Imp of the Mind" which could have been amazing but it uses the most extreme examples and will definitely be upsetting for anxious people to read.

The fear that we are secretly "that kind of person" who would do the things we are afraid of seems to be the driving force behind OCD thinking. If we could calculate the odds of something happening, they'd probably be thousands or millions to one against, because so many other things would need to happen - in most cases we'd need to go through some kind of radical personality change. When we're thinking like this, the rational side of our brain is not working, we think and act purely on emotion, so we tend to push aside reassuring facts like "If I was the kind of person who would do this, why am I so shocked and scared at the thought of it?"

("The Imp of the Mind" does calculate the chances of someone's worst fear coming true and the odds ended up at 1,000,000:1.)

[Scared_11]

I am suffering badly at the minute too! I have intrusive thoughts that upset and worry me! I am so afraid that it's not ocd and that I will act on my thoughts! I don't want to! The thoughts are relentless at the moment and I have an actual pain in my head.

I just want to stay in bed and sleep u till it all passes x

[Emphyrio]

SSRIs can worsen intrusive thoughts in the beginning. Its entirely possible that the sertraline could have triggered something.

Did you find coming off citalopram to be ok? I know that coming off SSRIs can result in anxiety, agitation and intrusive thoughts due to withdrawal. Mirtazapine doesn't hit the same receptors as SSRIs so it may not cover withdrawal. Just something to ponder.

What I find helps is to keep my body as sedated as possible. That means limited caffeine, chamomile tea, limited alcohol, enough sleep. Getting enough exercise also helps. I find that the intrusive thoughts are more likely to strike when I'm using a computer - here my mind is free to wander - though this is in the context of studying. If I had a job using computers like I had in the past I probably wouldn't have time to worry about my obsessive thoughts.

[NorthernGeek]

Obsessive negative thinking is one of my core symptoms too, in fact I can't remember a time when the voice in my head wasn't horribly negative, even when I was still at school in the 1970s. I have struggled with depressive episodes, low self esteem, constant feelings of irrational guilt & repetetive negative/distressing thoughts for pretty much all my life.

Although I only recently started on Citalopram after finally reaching the point where I just couldn't cope any more, I have been seeing a counsellor for the last two years, which was my attempt to avoid admitting to myself that I really did have serious mental health issues & that I needed medical help to solve them.

One of the issues I have discussed many times with my counsellor is the long lasting negative effects of the horrific bullying I endured at school for many years, especially since my negative inner voice is quite often very much like a bully that I can never escape, no matter how fast I run.

The negative voice isn't there every minute of every day, it seems to like to wait until I feel vulnerable & then ambush me, which quite often is when I am trying to get to sleep, hence my frequent problems with insomnia.

I'm really hoping that the Citalopram will allow me to finally get it under control, as it is awful never quite knowing when the negative voice & the associated panic attacks will strike.

My Doctor has also put me on a waiting list to see a Psychologist which will be interesting. I have read quite a lot of books in the past during vain attempts to diagnose & potentially cure myself, so it will be strange to finally be given an official label, especially since I have always been so afraid of accepting that I had a mental illness.