The blighter got back in

[tamo]

Hi to all :)

I haven't been here for a long time but wanted to say that my anxiety and panic surfaced again . I had a bad winter last year and some fibromyalgia symptoms or so the gp said after a 100 various blood tests and other tests were negative .
( things cleared up as the better weather came .... amazing )

This year did I subconciously dread the dark cold nights ? I felt the apprehension around late august and have gradually became more sensitised and now waking up with night panic and the odd panic during the day . I feel disapointed in myself for letting this creep back in but there you go . I,m trying hard to keep on top of the irrational HA thinking that I was plagued by years ago . This weird pain in my groin area has got me off the worry scale .
I need to get back to basics , re-read my old posts and KNOW that this is temporary .

I read a post by Eji1 which really inspired me , his list was lovley to read .

I have a strategy which includes most of the points in Eji1 list , diet/nutrition being the main focus . A good old listening to Dr Claire weeks will be helpful too ( pass through panic , she explains it all so beautifully )

I am feeling quite normal as i write this but this is an hour after I woke with a horrible night panic .

Love you all .

[phil6]

Hi Tamo
I can relate to your anticipation of the dark and cold evenings the winter brings, as this has always been my worst time of year. Summer sunshine allows us to do more things out in the open and to enjoy the sun and the warmth.
I can also sympathise with your nighttime panic attacks. My panic attacks are always bad very early in the morning when I wake usually at 4 AM.
Lying in bed trying to get some more sleep is usually a mistake.
As Claire Weekes says memory is such an old fox... It is almost inevitable that we will think of past suffering when we wake and it's still dark. All the old fears return and we can easily find ourselves back in a sensitised state.
I think the hardest thing to do is to remember that we have learned some skills from the past. I find that trying to do some breathing and relaxation exercises through these difficult periods in the night helps. But it is very hard not to think negatively at this time.
I simply try to remind myself that when the morning comes and the daytime light appears, things can return to some more normality.
Just try and keep things in proportion when passing through these difficult spells.
Phil

[tamo]

Thanks Phil ,

I agree with you about trying to force ourselves back to sleep, it just doesn't happen . I drag myself downstairs and have myself a light snack and a warm drink and try hard not to focus on myself , not easy when legs are like jelly and arms like lead but I find I feel better after about 1/2 an hour to and hour . I then go back to bed and try my best to meditate or at least be as mindful as possible , again not easy and hopefully drift off to sleep .

Had a good day today , felt a big one coming on but accepted it , shrugged my shoulders and just told it " do as you will I don't care " , it passed quite quickly . Its the watching ourselves that keeps it going . As Claire Weekes said so often dont add fear to fear , its the fear of the state we are in that keeps us there .
I have stated my healthier eating too and spent a small fortune on vits and minerals... C , D ,B complex with Biotin, Choline and Inositol , spirulina powder and magnesium .



Tom