Fathers cancer coming to an end!

[Kez_miller]

Hi guys.

Has many of you will know I have been a full time Carer for my father for the past 5 months. Well today he had the results of a ct scan back today and it turns out it has spread to his bones and the nurse told me that it looks like we are talking weeks being left rather then months due to him being 88 years old! Now I had a good cry when I found out I just broke down but now a couple of hours have past I feel physically sick and it feels like the start of a panic attack but without me actually having the full blown panic attack. It feels horrible and I just don't know what to do! In some ways I wish the panic attack would happen to get it out the way but I just feel that numb, that my body just isn't letting it happen. It's almost like a tug of war between my body saying no to the panic attack but my mind saying it wants to have the attack! Please help me out here.

[cpe1978]

Kez, I really feel for you, it is horrible hearing that news about anyone you care about. However 88 is a fine old age, if someone offered me another 53 years right now then I would snap their hand off.

Unfortunately we all have to die of something and whilst it doesnt make it any easier at all I hope that your father has had a long and exciting life.

Thinking of you.

[Annie0904]

Kez I can understand that this news will have made you feel really anxious and panicky. Your Dad is a good age and I know that doesn't make it easier but in some ways weeks is better as it means less time to suffer for him. I am sure you have lots of memories of times spent with your Dad. Perhaps you could make the time to make a memories box that you could write little memories and put them in or little objects that are special to you and your Dad.
If you feel like crying, do it as it is important to release your emotions. Your Dad is lucky to have you there for him and care for him. Sending you hugs :hugs::hugs::hugs:

[BumbleGirl]

Kez, I am so so sorry. I haven't read your previous posts but it sounds like you have done very well by your Dad. I'm sure he's proud of you. xxx

[hangingbasket]

I lost my mum 6 weeks ago. Her breast cancer had spread to her bones and liver. I remember sitting in the doctors office listening to them say she was deteriorating fast and only had weeks left. We got 10 days after that conversation. It sucks. Big time. Losing a parent is so hard. My mum was only 55 which makes it harder. I wish she'd had another 30 years. But no matter the age... it's still going to hurt like hell and if you're anything like me... it will play hell with your anxiety.
I have no words to comfort or reassure you, all I can do is empathise and say I know what you're feeling. Sorry to hear your news.

[Tanner40]

So sorry to hear the news about your Dad, Kez. Take heart in the fact that you are there beside him and have the strength in you to help him. My Mom died about 5 years ago and I was with her the entire time, so I certainly understand what you're going through. Take care!

[Twinsmummy]

Hi Kez

I am so sorry to hear about your father and I wish him a pain free and peaceful time to come. I am no expert but I would imagine your reactions are completely normal. It must be the weirdest piece of information to try and process that someone who has always been in your life isn't going to be there in a relatively short space of time and that is too big for your mind to cope with? I would guess your body is mentally bracing itself, steeling yourself to keep going for the next few weeks/months. If I am under huge stress it is like I am outside myself listening and I think it is a way of protecting yourself while helping you to get through it.

I'm sorry I can't offer more words of advice and wish you and your family the best.

X