A difficult situation to be in.

[Granny Primark]

Year 2000 in Turkey we met a couple that live about 30 miles from us.
Weve kept in touch even visiting each others homes.
But for the last 6 years the man has been ringing me. Wed have a chat then id asked to have a word with my close friend his wife.Hed say shed just gone out. Then hed started talking filthy and my God I mean filthy. Ive told him in a nice way that I dont mind a cheeky joke but I will not tolerate that kind of talk. Yet still he does it! I end up going to my door and knocking on it to get rid of him or get a friend to ring me on my mobile.
I dont do anything to encourage him. In fact yesterday when he rang and id got rid of him I felt physically sick and ended up in tears.
His wife is disabled and one of the nicest people you could wish to meet.
I so value her friendship and dont want to lose her friendship. Not only that I dont want her hurt. Shes suffered enough
What the hell do I do?

[Annie0904]

I would tell your husband and get him to speak to him. This is sexual harassment and he needs to know it is NOT acceptable. If you don't want to tell your husband then you are going to have to be very firm with him yourself and tell him straight that you do not want this kind of talk...if he continues then just end the call.

[Rennie1989]

Tell your husband, definitely. I agree that this is sexual harassment and he needs to stop. Try ignoring him for the time being, if he's still persistent then tell him to leave you alone, firmly. If he carries on then I'd suggest getting your husband to speak to him. It's unacceptable behavior.

[Edie]

I'm really sorry this is happening. It's a very difficult situation because you do not want to lose your friendship with his wife, but you really don't want to have to deal with these phone calls.

Although you have done nothing to invite this and it's definitely not your fault, you have allowed him to continue and listened to him say these things. He may well have taken this as encouragement. Remember that you are in control of your phone. You can hang up your phone without giving a reason.

You can block certain phone numbers from calling you. Sadly this would prevent his wife from calling you too, but if you want to do that, it can be done. Call your phone provider and they will do this for you for a small fee - I'm with BT and it's around £3 per month as I had an issue with someone a while back (nothing as serious as this).