Stopped Doing What I Was Doing

[Tanner40]

I find it amazing that when I begin to feel better, I miraculously seem to forget what got me there. I have felt so much better the last three weeks and for the most part, have been enjoying my life.

So what happens for me is that it's like going on a diet, and losing the twenty pounds that I wanted to lose, and then going back to eating apple pie and ice cream every night. Here comes that twenty pounds again.

I feel better and I seem to forget that this is a disease that needs consistent work and maintenance. So I begin to put back on " one pound of anxiety a day".

I journaled this morning and immediately figured out my problem. I had been working so hard: making time for 30 minutes a day of watching something that would make me laugh; journaling every morning; working my online CBT course daily; reading the book, Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway, for 15-20 minutes; relaxation tape for 30 minutes every other day.

So I begin to feel so much better and I began to let each of these things slide. Amazing what can happen within a week of not taking care of myself. I must think that I have this thing beat and don't have to do these things anymore. Oh, not so true. This is a life change that needs to continue.

New habits take a long time to become ingrained and old habits sneak back in so quickly. I still feel well but have felt my anxiety begin to insidiously slip back in. That is just NOT going to happen.

I need to remember to continue to practice the daily regimen that is beginning to change my life for the better. My small blip has been self created, just as my anxiety is self created.

Would be curious to hear others stories of how they find the discipline to keep up with their practices that keep them healthy.

Hope everyone has a great Sunday!

[Fishmanpa]

Tanner,

Interesting that you post this. I responded to CP's post as he used the word "habit" as well pertaining to HA. I believe it is somewhat of a habit in the way you react to niggles and such as well as physiological and environmental aspects as well. The healing part and CBT is habit as well. It's really no different than what I have to do to keep my heart healthy and recover from cancer. Eat right, exercise and work on my attitude every day.

Good post and time to get back on the wagon even if it is Football Sunday ;)

Positive thoughts

[Tanner40]

Hi Fishmanpa, I actually thought of you as I was posting this. Thought of all of the work and the exercises that you need to do to stay strong and healthy. I am fully back on the wagon as of this morning. I just needed a reminder and was hoping that this post might be helpful to others who think that their blips just come out of the blue. We always have a hand in these, due to our thoughts, reactions and habits.
I'm actually going to a friend's 50th birthday party today. Brunch, a poker tournament and football, of course.
Hope your Eagles whip up on the Lions!

[Fishmanpa]

You and many others here who are grabbing the bull by the horns inspire and encourage me to keep placing one foot in front of the other in my recovery both physically and mentally. While there are differences in our illnesses, they are equally as challenging to heal from.

I go tomorrow to my GP for my wellness exam. I had blood work done last week and I'll get the results. I fully expect them to be good. I am a little concerned about my TSH levels (thyroid) as radiation often kills off the thyroid gland. It plays a big part in the fatigue aspect of recovery. I'm expecting it'll be a bit off as I run out of gas pretty easily. I expect that I'll be on synthroid within a year.

Have a great time at the party! And yes Go Birds! It's going to be a good game. We're in the midst of a Winter storm here and it's supposed to get messy in the Philly area about game time ;)
I have a big pot of chili I made yesterday warming in the crock pot and some Sierra Nevada Kellerweis in the fridge. A perfect combo for a cold Wintry day :)

Positive thoughts

[Tanner40]

Good luck with the check up tomorrow. I'll be thinking of you and wishing you well. And there's not much better than messy football.