Tough time at the moment!

[jimbobrooney]

Hi everyone

I have been going through a tough time over the past 4-6 weeks. All came to a head when i was convinced i had stage 4 melanoma as a doctor said a mole on my back was "different" to the rest. I went on google overdrive and almost had a breakdown

Anyway, went to dermatologist who said it was fine :-) . You would think that would make me better !

But no, because when i was in my worst stage of cancer panic, i thought that my lymph nodes were swollen (even though i had no evidence of this, except i thought they felt odd). Then i prodded / felt and played with my under arms etc for the past week or so and now my underarm is actually sore :-)

Im exhausted tired and run down because while going through the mole scare, i didnt eat or sleep.

Im constantly checking my underarms and am very "aware" of them now. My ears are kind of sore ( i think) and my worry is increasing again

So basically my fear is that the dermatologist mis diagnosed the mole and i have advanced cancer in my lymph nodes. Writing this actually makes me reliase how crazy it sounds and a good nights sleep would probably help a lot :-)

Im not going back to doctor as these underam issues only arose when i started to think about it

Im at work for first day in a week and falling asleep at the desk - i was sure the depression would have lifted by now but i think i am sliding again!

Can anyone give some advice ? Im sure if my under arm lymph nodes were really swollen then i would feel a lump or i would feel sick etc

[HoneyLove]

Hi Jim, it sounds like you've been going around in cycles of anxiety and fear, no wonder you are exhausted.

What help have you been getting for the anxiety? Have you put any lifestyle measures in place or have you sought out professional help?

[jimbobrooney]

Hi Honey

I have never gotten help for the anxiety to be honest. I always plough through it and just drive on.

I am a frequent gym visitor and this helps for sure. Never did anything else though.

WOuld you recommend meds ?

[HoneyLove]

I haven't taken meds, so personally I cannot recommend them. My own view on medication is that it's a temporary solution to help you feel calmer, but the most important work is the stuff you do yourself. Meds won't cure you, they'll only dull the symptoms.

[jimbobrooney]

have pain in my knee the last few days - am thinking its the cancer spreading to my bones (even though i went for 1.5 mile run last night!))

Have little pain in ear too and thats cos of swolen lymph nodes (also due to the cancer) even though i cant feel any swolen nodes!!