Cheesemonster13
09-12-13, 10:12
I've just read this online article about this and realised that it is at the root of my problems with excessive anxiety and depression. It particularly explains why I fear flying above anything else - trapped in a situation with no control over a long period of time - and my excessive cleaning and tidying - over-compensating by trying to control my environment.
I have copied out the main points of the article for my future reference, and include them here for anyone interested. The source of this information is Cohen, Elliot D., (May 2011), "The Fear of Losing Control" from "What Would Aristotle Do? The power of reason.", [online], accessed December 2013.
Fear of losing control:
1. Suffered by people who believe that if you don't manage to control the outcome of future events, something terrible will happen.
2a) They generally in a never-ending heightened state of stress, with only brief intermissions between fears.
2b) They are often perfectionists.
3) Unrealistic - the world is always tentative and uncertain.
3b) Unrealistic - you cannot accurately predict and manage the future.
4a) Let go of your demand for certainty about reality.
4b) Have the courage to face the inherent and avoidable uncertainty of the future; that you are inherently flawed, part of a universe that offers no guarantees.
4c) Feel free to relax and live imperfectly.
5a) You are in control of mental attitudes such as desires, hopes, wishes and preferences. You can stop worrying and ruminating now, not later.
5b) You can make what you believe to be reasonable judgements about the future, to push yourself to act on the evidence or to take precautions.
5c) You are not in control of external things including the approval of others.
5d) You cannot guarantee success.
I have copied out the main points of the article for my future reference, and include them here for anyone interested. The source of this information is Cohen, Elliot D., (May 2011), "The Fear of Losing Control" from "What Would Aristotle Do? The power of reason.", [online], accessed December 2013.
Fear of losing control:
1. Suffered by people who believe that if you don't manage to control the outcome of future events, something terrible will happen.
2a) They generally in a never-ending heightened state of stress, with only brief intermissions between fears.
2b) They are often perfectionists.
3) Unrealistic - the world is always tentative and uncertain.
3b) Unrealistic - you cannot accurately predict and manage the future.
4a) Let go of your demand for certainty about reality.
4b) Have the courage to face the inherent and avoidable uncertainty of the future; that you are inherently flawed, part of a universe that offers no guarantees.
4c) Feel free to relax and live imperfectly.
5a) You are in control of mental attitudes such as desires, hopes, wishes and preferences. You can stop worrying and ruminating now, not later.
5b) You can make what you believe to be reasonable judgements about the future, to push yourself to act on the evidence or to take precautions.
5c) You are not in control of external things including the approval of others.
5d) You cannot guarantee success.