Panicing with possible end to relationship

[Andorkov]

We've been together 4 years, and I'm 26, she's 24.

Things have slowed down lately, I really started playing video games and wasting my time on stupid things, not spending nearly as much time with my girl, as I feel I should've now.

Thing is...I noticed her answer a msg secretly, and the terrible person inside me knew something was up. I read this msg history between her and a guy, and a week ago she was saying she wants to break up, doesn't know how to do it, but that she also doesn't know if she can do it. She also said she wished she was a bad girl so she could just cheat and get it over with..

I haven't told her I read this, and I wish I never did.

I realized I should've been spending more time with her after I reevaluated our relationship. She loves me and I love her, don't want to lose her..

Problem is, I've talked to her, not telling her what I read, but we talked about taking a break, I said I didn't want that and she basically agreed, problem is I feel she may still actually feel like breaking up. I know we hadn't talked before I read those msgs, and things can change.

How do I stop thinking she always wants to leave me? Keep in mind its only been a couple days since I read those msgs and we talked.

I feel like I need to talk with her again, without sounding needy, and get her to say how she feels about me? Usually when I start a convo like that she doesn't say much, just agrees with me.

How do I get myself to calm down about this? I worry so bad I gave myself an ulcer, I've been so tired and depressed before basically when I've felt like this. I need to function, and I feel like the only thing I can do is talk to her, so what do I need to hear and how do I approach it?

Thanks

[Fishmanpa]

All I have to say is "actions speak louder than words". It's the little things that mean so much believe me. A card or flowers for no reason, doing the laundry or housework without asking, cooking a nice meal, going out on a "date" with her. You can say "I Love You" till the cows come home but if you're off playing video games after dinner, it'll do you no good.

Positive thoughts

[james_grimble]

The wheels are already in motion for her leaving you so you need to act quickly to try and save this.

Take her out, buy her flowers, take her away for the weekend and have fun or book a night in a hotel with spa facilities and pamper her.


Just do you best to win her affections back in the next couple of weeks and do all you can.


if she still feels like her future is away fom you then atleast you can say you did all you can.


....and remember if she leaves you then it wasnt right, so dont worry you will find someone else down the line and will be happier than you have ever been now !