Sorry I sound like a broken record : Lymphoma

[Gemmal]

Hello Everyone

I have had a hodgkins fear beginning March 2012. I swear I started noticing painful lymphnodes after I drink alcohol, of course googled and went into a complete frenzy. I was in Australia at the time, six doctors has never heard of this? :angel-smiley-006: ::)

Anyway, done all the bloods and a chest x ray, no swollen nodes and no abnormalities.

Roll forward 22 months , I am still here ( thats a plus) still no swollen nodes, I mean I can feel lymph nodes but this forum has been a godsend as I realise everyone can.

I have itchy skin now and then which I do now think is down to my anxiety.

I have also gained half a stone.

Also had bloods repeated six times.

Sorry for the spiel, but seriously can someone tell me ? Am i going mad? am i imagining this pain with alcohol because I am anticipating it?

Genuinely think I have lost it, I have spent a fortune on online docs who same to tell me that I am fine and do not have lymphoma.

Feel free to be harsh! I hate hate hate living like this!

Gemma

[Fishmanpa]

Gemmel, Gemmel, Gemmel....

One only needs to read your post to know what the issue is... You know it too ;)

You could spend another small fortune and it wouldn't get you any closer to peace concerning your fear. No one here can tell you anything nor reassure you either. Besides, reassurance is a minuscule and very temporary fix anyway.

To answer your question... YES... the mind is the most powerful organ in the body and can cause physical symptoms where there were none previously.

Let me ask you... you say you hate x 3 living the way you do. What have you done to treat the real disease you have?

I had cancer this year. I'm actually just 7 months post treatment for stage IV oral cancer. I actually thought I had lymphoma due to the painless swollen node on the left side of my neck. Dr. Google had me convinced! What he didn't tell me was that a swollen, painless lymph node could also be squamous cell carcinoma. No cancer is good but as far as cancers go SCC is one of the nastiest out there. When my ENT told me it was SCC I was actually relieved it wasn't lymphoma... that is until I looked up SCC! Damn... it sucked!

You have no such issue no do you want it! Tell you what. Next time you want to spend hundreds of dollars on a doctor visit and tests, send the money to me and I'll donate it to the oral cancer foundation. Deal? :)

Do speak to your GP about a referral for counseling or CBT and even possibly meds to help control your HA. If you hate x 3 the way you're living, do something to bring it down to hate x 2 and work on getting it to hate x 0.

There now... that wasn't too harsh if you take some of the sarcasm out of it :noangel:

Positive thoughts

[Yossino]

... you say you hate x 3 living the way you do. What have you done to treat the real disease you have?

He's right. Your enemy #1 is anxiety. Trust me, the sooner you realize it, the better.

[Nich]

I posted a thread about lymph cancer, bloods done and also chest xray, nothing shown. Two swollen lymphs for a year and a half. One doctor told me I was likely to have cancer, the othrr thought it was nothing sinister....just wanted to let you know you are not alone....go back! I am currently being booked in for a neck ultrasound

[jimbobrooney]

Gemmal - i am in the same boat as yourself as the moment.

No swolen nodes but have itchy / fiery skin under my arm (which i believe to be from poking and prodding)

[Hypo]

Listen, my ex husband is dying of lymphoma (non hodgkins but it makes no difference here)

Trust me, if you have it you would know. Especially after all this time.

Trust me, cancer that has been around for a while would be so very obvious. I am watching it happen to a loved one now. You do not have cancer.

[jimbobrooney]

Hypo

How do you know you would have it ?

[Hypo]

Hypo

How do you know you would have it ?

I am not going to tell you that as it won't be helpful in the long run. If you are like me you will only imagine the symptoms :D

In the early stages perhaps not. But the OP has had these symptoms for 22 months, buy now there would be very obvious outward signs as well. Very obvious.

I have watched someone go from the early stages to the last few days of living, cancer that has been around for a while, lymphoma cancer anyway, would be obvious.

[Gemmal]

Ah thank you so so so much guys for your response I guess you are right I do think I would definately be very very ill by now !! I must be ??

Hypo I am so very sorry to hear about your situation :( it must be awful ! I'm thinking of you !

I just can't shake this nagging feeling . Although I must say my gp said weight gain is healthy so there Is no chance I have it ! I mean I really should listen .

Definately not happy about the weight gain though ! Lol

Thanks guys I really don't know how I would cope without this forum

---------- Post added at 18:56 ---------- Previous post was at 18:08 ----------

Also thankyou so much fishmanpa for your wonderful insight again i will definately take you up on your offer of sending you money lol !

Also hypo for being really honest with me I needed that ! Sorry about your ex husband again :( !

[Hypo]

Thank you Gemmal.

I will tell you one thing, not to scare you but to help you put this in perspective.

He looks like a human pin cushion that got mixed up with a boxer. I am not talking about little bruises, medium bruises or even big bruises but bruises the size of a fist with blood pooling on the top. People would stop and stare and the sheer size and painful look of them. Swollen organs that makes the body look distorted.

If you had it for 22 months you would know xx xx

And I only say this to help you. I once thought I might have had it due to a lot of bruising, I now know exactly what kind of bruising they mean and unless you have seen a naked person with cancer like this you would never have seen bruises like it.

[Gemmal]

Oh my Gosh Hypo how awful ! I 100% appreciate you telling me this , I need to appreciate that lymphoma does present in NOTICEABLE symptoms, as I am google maniac I read about the bruising and like yourself got freaked out by the slightest one! but wow nothing like that :(.

What a horrible disease :(

Really makes you appreciate it the bigger picture when you hear about someone who really has it! xxxxx

[jimbobrooney]

Oh my Gosh Hypo how awful ! I 100% appreciate you telling me this , I need to appreciate that lymphoma does present in NOTICEABLE symptoms, as I am google maniac I read about the bruising and like yourself got freaked out by the slightest one! but wow nothing like that :(.

What a horrible disease :(

Really makes you appreciate it the bigger picture when you hear about someone who really has it! xxxxx


Yes it makes the rest of us sound a bit sad in fairness. Im pretty much over my scare - this is my first one in 3 years and what i have noticed is that it happened around the same time (end of year)

That tells me that is either because my father died in october when i was young and i am vunerable at that time or else its because i have SAD - i have the dark and lack of sunlight

Has anyone any experience of those lamps ?